


Candied Facade

by Herembers



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Baggage, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Pining, Romance, Stalking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 49,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25561132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Herembers/pseuds/Herembers
Summary: Five years after the murder of her parents, Misa Amane has moved on as best she can, but after a stalker sends a disturbing picture from her past, she turns once again to the mysterious detective for help.
Relationships: Amane Misa/L
Comments: 150
Kudos: 147





	1. The Photo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2/17/21: This fic is currently on hiatus. I plan to begin re-writing and restructuring it soon and will hopefully update it on a more consistent basis with less pressure. There’s a few things I wasn’t quite happy with when I first started posting but did it anyway because I was just excited to be writing again. There’s a lot I love about this story and even if there’s not a lot of interest, I still want to work hard on it. 
> 
> I’ve been working on some LxMisa one-shots on the side in the meantime ❤️ So check those out of that’s your thing. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

_there are some people i know_

_whose beauty_

_is a crime._

_who make you so crazy_

_you don't know_

_whether to throw yourself_

_at them_

_or kill them._

_which makes_

_for permanent madness._

_which could be_

_bad for you._

_you better be on the lookout_

_for such circumstances._

_-Jessica Hagedorn, Sorcery_

* * *

Sitting in the brightly lit cafe, Misa Amane felt distinctly exposed. She took a perfunctory sip from the frosty glass before her, casting a covert glance around the room. A few university students on laptops littered the place, no one familiar thankfully. She was grateful for the short, glossy, brunette wig she snagged from her last magazine shoot as well as the understated outfit she chose that in no way reflected her actual style. She couldn't risk getting recognized. Her leg bounced under the table in a jittery rhythm. He'd be there soon.

She pulled a compact out of her tote to check her makeup. She hadn't quite managed to cover the splotchy blue circles blooming under her eyes. She spent the night before checking and rechecking the locks in her apartment and scrolling obsessively through Twitter on her phone to see if any new photos of her had been sent. Thankfully, none. But by the time she settled into bed the sun was rising and it was time to get ready for her meeting.

It had been a long shot she knew. Watari was kind when he explained that Ryuzaki was nearly impossible to get a hold of these days and that the down payment to hire him would be expensive and that he _still_ might not take her case. She had to try. She had several uncashed paychecks stashed away along with a hefty sum in her bank account from her parents. She'd spend it all if she had to. She didn't have any illusions about their previous relationship, if you'd call it that. She tried not to anyway.

Yes, Ryuzaki had solved her parents murder, but after that he had disappeared almost entirely from Misa's life. The only connection she had to him was the occasional phone call with Watari who made sure she was doing alright. She tried not to feel hurt over the whole thing. She knew it was his job; it was to be expected. She was just another case for the famous Ryuzaki to solve. At the end of the day she was stamped as SOLVED and filed neatly away in a cabinet somewhere along with the rest of his impressive work.

But she thought of him often in the years since. During the initial investigation when everyone else treated her with pity, he treated her like a valuable source of information. He never once made her feel stupid or crazy. He let her cry. He let her grieve. And most importantly: he found the man who did it.

She looked at her reflection in the compact. How different she had looked. Misa was seventeen then, and suddenly found herself completely alone in the world.

She remembered the sterile, grey interrogation room. The grueling hours of questions she couldn't answer. Every detective they brought in getting more frustrated with her. They kept having her relive it over and over.

_She came home later than usual after sneaking out to see her boyfriend. After unlocking the front door, she stumbled over something only to look down and see it was the cold body of her mother, a pool of dark red blood spread around her, her unseeing eyes gazing into the living room where her father lay crumpled and still..._

She remembered how she had stood up then and threw a cup of coffee someone had brought her. It shattered against the wall. That's when she felt his arms reach out and grip her shoulders.

" _You're angry. Be angry." He said, leaning forward, looking her dead in the eyes. "But I will catch that man. This isn't an empty promise. I will bring him before you in a court of law and he will answer for what he's done to your family. For what he's done to you."_

He kept his promise. After he solved her parents murder she was able to begin to piece her life together and start over with a clean slate. She landed a contract with one of the top talent agencies in the country. She threw herself into her work. From the age of 17 to 23 she worked harder than anyone she knew. While most other girls whined and found the rigorous training schedule and dating rules suffocating, she was grateful for the stability and sense of normalcy it provided. No one knew about her family. Her agency gave her a new background complete with fake parents and even a little brother, with strict instructions not to mention her family history whatsoever or she'd be dropped. Bad publicity, they said. She agreed and even if it hurt a little, she made good on that promise.

Television shows, promoting lingerie and swimwear, photo shoots, meet and greets. Through her time in the spotlight she became an expert at hiding her feelings. She'd joke about her fans being her whole world, but it was true. She had no connection to her previous life anymore. She'd come home at night and sit in the silence. It was in those quiet moments thoughts of Ryuzaki would creep up on her. Did he see how hard she was working? Was he ever watching over her? Phone calls to him went unanswered. Voicemails left unreturned. But she allowed herself the indulgent daydream here and there that he may actually be looking out for her in his own way and be proud of her since no one else could be.

Now, five years later, her focus on lingerie and swimsuit modeling brought her the most success, but she began to branch out with music and singing. Her agency seemed to like her better with her clothes off, but allowed her to promote her music on the side.

Before she could really begin to make her music career take off however, she started noticing a disturbing trend in her fanmail. At first it was benign: a letter or message on twitter mentioning where they had last seen her, what products they had seen her buy or what color her dress was. This was standard; her whereabouts were strictly tracked even by her own agency let alone loyal, eagle-eyed fans. But soon came the photos. First of her arriving in her hotel room. Then one of her sleeping, taken through the window. They began to pile up enough that she tried bringing it to her agency's attention. They did little to help. An overzealous fan, they said brushing her concerns aside. She should be fortunate to have such a dedicated fan base. He would calm down, they said, and eventually leave her be.

She wasn't so sure that whoever this 'fan' was would back down. They were only getting started it seemed. After seeing the last photo she was sent, she immediately called Watari and begged for the meeting with the only person she could count on.

She put the compact away quickly when the man in question slouched over to the table and took the seat in front of her.

Ryuzaki looked and dressed identical to how she remembered him nearly 5 years earlier. Maybe slightly more mature, but he still had a messy, boyish quality to him. He always gave off the rumpled impression of having just rolled out of bed, even if his eyes said otherwise. His dark circles mirrored her own, though she at least made an effort to cover hers.

"Miss Amane." He said quietly, his eyes falling on her brown wig, "Or perhaps I should be addressing you under an alias?"

"I think we'll be okay." She replied smiling, "I just didn't want any fans finding out I'm here."

She pushed the strawberry tart and milkshake she ordered for him forward.

He eyed them with interest, "Very kind of you to remember."

He dug in at once. Of course she recalled his peculiar penchant for sweets and watched him pick up a fork and stab a syrupy strawberry. Whenever a model friend would cry about what their overindulgence in sweets would do to their waistline she thought of Ryuzaki's freakish metabolism.

"Well then, let's not waste time: why the urgent call to meet?"

"First, I have to ask," She said shyly, casting her eyes down, her lips pouting. _This will butter him up_ , "I have wondered...if Ryuzaki has missed Misa?"

He sucked on the milkshake thoughtfully for a moment, "I can't say. I've been very busy. My mind has been elsewhere."

A non-answer. She took a small breath and nodded. She expected that much. She smiled, trying again, "I have thought of Ryuzaki over the years so gratefully. Without you I wouldn't be where I am today. Or even _who_ I am. It really is all thanks to you."

"I don't think that's true." He said mildly, taking another forkful of the sticky tart, speaking with his mouth half full before swallowing. "You give me too much credit. That or you're trying to butter me up to get something out of me. Either way I'd prefer if you got to the point."

Bullseye. She flushed, unused to dealing with men who weren't immediately fawning all over her. His straightforward demeanor threw her entire plan off balance, and she floundered for a moment.

"Well, what if I just called you here to catch up?"

Ryuzaki began pushing back from the table, "Then I'd have to be on my way."

"Wait!" She cried, frantically throwing her hands up in defeat, "Okay fine. I'll tell you!"

He sat down again and pulled the plate of half-eaten tart back to him. "Go on."

"Well," Misa said, fidgeting with her straw, "I think I have a stalker and I was hoping you'd take a look at it for me."

Ryuzaki took his time chewing before answering, "I can't do that. I'm sorry."

"Why not? I thought you were taking new cases?" She sputtered, "I can pay!"

"You're mistaken." He said flatly, "I only take on cases I find interesting."

Misa's shiny pink lips popped open in indignation, "Interesting? Misa's stalker isn't _interesting_ enough for you?"

"Not particularly, no." He said scooping a dollop of whipped cream into his mouth.

"And why not?" She demanded.

Ryuzaki sighed, fishing a cherry out of the bottom of his milkshake. "Misa, models often have stalkers. You know this. I've seen you deal with them throughout your career with ease."

"Those times were different!" She said hotly, "and besides those-" She stopped and her eyes narrowed, "How did you know I've had stalkers before?"

He paused mid bite, his wide eyes sheepish as he looked away, "A lucky guess I suppose. Every model has them at one point or another. Your industry is rife with corruption and makes it easy for criminals to take advantage of the young women in them."

This didn't convince her. Maybe he hadn't scoured newspapers looking for her name like she had his, but she knew he had to care. Even if only a little.

"This is different Ryuzaki," She said urgently, "I think he might do something and if you know this industry, then you know I'm not safe; you know I have nowhere to turn."

He sighed again and eyed her seriously, "I can't go out of my way every time a small case arises because someone might someday become more dangerous."

"He's dangerous _now._ " She pleaded and unexpectedly, took a hold of his hands causing him to drop his fork. They were large, cold and rigid in hers. He looked up at her seemingly alarmed by the physical contact, but she continued in a shaky whisper. "He knows about them-my family."

His eyes flicked down to their entwined hands. She pulled hers back apologetically while he studied her for a moment.

"I had those records sealed. Did you tell anyone?"

She shook her head adamantly, "Why would I want anyone to know that? It was one of the stipulations of my contract! Plus my agency would never tell; it would be a total disaster for them."

"And friends? Boyfriends?" He pressed.

Misa bowed her head, "Misa doesn't-I don't have that many friends. And I'm not really allowed to be in a romantic relationship."

She pulled her phone out of her pocket and, casting a furtive glance around the room, showed him the pictures she'd been sent. She scrolled through the blurry ones of her sleeping in bed, coming home late, keys in hand and the one that scared her the most that had been sent only a few days earlier. It was taken in broad daylight and showed her parents' grave with one fresh, pink rose laid delicately on top.

Ryuzaki took the phone, scrolling through until he reached the last one. His dark eyes peering at the picture intently and biting his thumb, lost in thought. She could almost see the gears whirring in his brain. A flicker of hope ignited inside of her.

"There wasn't anything else in the message." She added, "Whoever it was, they didn't say or send anything else since."

"Yes it seems he's made his point quite clear, though I think you're right: this won't be the last you'll hear from him." Ryuzaki murmured, frowning at the picture again before handing the phone back to her.

"So, will you help me?"

His owlish eyes met hers. "There may be more to this supposed stalker. I'll need to gain access to your social media accounts, it'll be faster if you give me that information now and I'll need the pass-code to your apartment."

A man knowing her pass-code? "My agency-"

"Ah yes they do pose a small problem." He tapped his chin for a moment thoughtfully, "No matter I'll find a workaround with them."

She hesitated for a moment, but scrawled her pass-code as well as the passwords and emails to her accounts on a torn page from the notebook she dug from her tote and slid it across the table.

He pocketed it, "I'll see what I can do. I'll have Watari get a hold of you when I find something."

Misa nodded feeling a weight lift off of her chest and gave him a radiant smile, "Oh Ryuzaki I could just kiss you right now!"

"That may be against your contract." He said dryly.

He bit into the last strawberry from his tart and swiped his thumb across the side of his mouth where a stray bit of blood red syrup dripped down his lip. She watched transfixed for a moment before he stood up.

"I'll be going now Miss Amane." He gave her a small nod, that she returned beaming at him, and watched as he left the cafe without another word.

* * *

"I'll meet with her."

He hung up the phone with Watari, glancing over at the shelf in his room. He didn't have much in the way of prized possessions and as such the shelf was largely bare save for a few books and CD's.

In the years since solving Misa Amane's case, It was difficult not to think of her. She was tucked into every magazine stand he passed, her carefully clipped centerfolds the treasured possession of more than a few detectives he worked with. Her Gothic motif contrasted with her cloyingly sweet bubblegum personality made her a sensation.

Flipping through the channels in hotel rooms, he'd watch her do the occasional interview and perfume commercial. Her doll-like eyes and seductively sweet smile always had the audience in the palm of her hands. However, she kept the real Misa, the passionate, angry, innocent Misa he knew, carefully concealed behind a pretty veneer of pouty lips and black lace. It was only in her music, he felt, that some authenticity remained.

Singing was one of her newest ventures, he noticed. Anytime he heard one of her songs he found it hard to think and switched it off almost immediately. Misa's breathy vocals did sometimes give way to a powerful feeling he'd concede, but overall her music was just not his taste. Authentic, but too emotional. This is what he told himself even when he received the change back from the cashier after purchasing her latest single. He took the CD home to stick on the shelf next to her others. Just another place in his life where Misa Amane had made herself a home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I'm not sure if the fandom is dead or if there are any fans of this particular ship out there craving fics, but that's not going to stop me right now. I'm an essential worker and I've been writing most of this on breaks at work since around April/May. I've had this story in my head for a long time, but never took the time to plot it out. Well, with how the world is right now, I needed some distraction. This is purely for fun, I apologize for grammatical errors. I definitely plan on going back and proofreading more thoroughly later on. I just wanted to at least get started posting, because knowing me I'll keep it in the drafts forever and never post, I don't want that.
> 
> I've always loved the idea of LxMisa, they have such an interesting dynamic. I wanted to flesh Misa's personality out a bit more, give her a better romance. This is an AU of sorts with some characters having the same or near the same occupations. Other familiar characters will of course pop up with the exception of shinigami.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	2. The Gift

__

_Escape me?_

_Never—_

_Beloved!_

_While I am I, and you are you,_

_So long as the world contains us both,_

_Me the loving and you the loth,_

_While the one eludes, must the other pursue._

_-Robert Browning,_ _Life in a Love_

* * *

Misa sat among a forest of lush foliage, decked in a creamy white satin négligée, her back arched against a faux railing, a seductive smile on her burgundy lips.

"Perfect!”

_Click click click_

"Tilt your head to the left, just a little."

_Click click click_

"That one looks great, I think we have it!"

Misa accepted the black silk robe someone had draped over her shoulders. She tied it closed haphazardly and got up to hop around the camera to check the pictures out.

"Ah! They came out great!" Misa exclaimed clapping her hands together. "You're so talented and you made my boobs look amazing!"

Naomi Misora was Misa's favorite photographer to work with. She was always so positive, encouraging and best of all, unlike some of the male photographers she worked with, she didn't have to worry about being hit on. Days she worked with Naomi always flew by.

Naomi laughed, switching through the photos as the crew around them began taking props and photo equipment down, "I think you should thank wardrobe for that one. And your mother perhaps."

Naomi turned to her as she slid her camera into its case, "Hey, if you have some time would you like to come over and have a coffee or something? I feel like it's been forever since we've talked."

"Yes, I'd love that!" Misa said excitedly, "I'll finish getting dressed!"

Out of all the people Misa had in her life, Naomi was the only one she counted as a genuine friend. She got along fine with the other models at her agency, but something with Naomi just clicked.

When Misa first worked with her she worried she'd be too strict. Naomi walked in with her black turtleneck and leather jacket looking beautiful, but slightly severe. Whispers around the studio said she was hard to please, but in time Misa found she was the opposite. Unlike most of the photographers her agency hired, who would fawn all over her and have her do stale poses she hated for long periods of time, Naomi deferred to Misa when it came to what looked best. She valued her input, made sure she was hydrated and comfortable. Her photo-shoots would also have a much smaller crew that she hand selected. So from the outside it made her look picky, but Misa knew it was just because she put care into her work. And it showed; the pictures she took always did the best in magazines and online sales. Whenever Misa had a choice of photographer, she chose her every time.

After a short taxi ride to Naomi's apartment, Misa settled on the couch with a happy sigh. It had been several weeks since she'd last been able to spend any time with her friend. She loved visiting her, because Naomi's home was like an oasis in the city. It overflowed with different types of greenery. Big, wild ferns nestled into corners, their spiky leaves jutting out next to floor to ceiling windows that overlooked a small courtyard that was currently filled with flowering hydrangea. Small pots with pothos hung above, their tendrils curling gracefully downward. By the front door Naomi's pride and joy, a giant monstera plant, greeted visitors. Misa noticed with some pride that the small succulent she bought her was sitting neatly on the side table.

Naomi bustled around the home, bringing her out a mug of coffee and sweets, setting them on the coffee table. "Did you talk to the agency about your stalker again?"

Misa grabbed a cookie to nibble at and rolled her eyes. "I did, but you know how they are. They're useless. They think I should be flattered."

Naomi frowned, shaking her head in disgust. "I don't like it. I know how this pattern of behavior goes. You know, I could always contact someone in the bureau to see if they could help?"

Naomi was formerly an investigator working overseas, but quit to pursue a dream of being a photographer. Something she had confessed to Misa one rare night they had gone out drinking together. She was the only person aside from Ryuzaki of whom she had confided about the stalker.

"It's okay. I found someone who'll stop this creep for sure."

Misa said this confidently, a small smile playing at her lips. She took another bite at the cookie and looked up to see Naomi leaning forward, an eyebrow arched in surprise, "Oh really?"

Misa nodded, "Only, it's a secret, so don't tell anyone! He's really good though."

"He?" Naomi eyed her skeptically. "Where did you meet this one?"

"He's not just some guy I flirted with and conned into helping me!" Misa huffed, "Trust me, I tried. He's immune to my feminine charms." She pouted at this for a moment before continuing, "But he's really smart and he's helped me before. I trust him."

Naomi settled back into her chair, "So you know him pretty well then?"

Misa nodded again. She never told Naomi about what happened to her parents or Ryuzaki. Not that she didn't trust her; she just didn't want the pity. Not to mention reliving it again would be painful. The pictures the stalker sent alarmed Naomi even without knowing about the one of her parents grave.

Naomi grinned over her cup of coffee, "Well if he's immune to your _feminine charms_ then I guess he can be trusted."

Misa wrinkled her nose at this, "It's really not flattering. What works on other guys doesn't work on him."

"Misa-Misa doesn't work?" Naomi asked innocently.

Misa threw her a withering stare, "That's my model persona!"

She hugged a throw pillow to her chest and mumbled, "But no, it didn't work."

"Maybe he has a girlfriend?" Naomi suggested.

Misa bolted upright, "No way! You think?"

Naomi took a long sip before replying, "Or, he's not a creep and thinks the Misa-Misa thing is annoying. Either way."

"I should throw a plant at you."

"But this man...you're not interested in him are you?" Naomi asked curiously.

Misa waved her hand dismissively, "No way. I just respect him. He's totally a weirdo, but like I said: he really helped me out. I can count on him. He took me serious when no one else did. He's just..."

"Important?"

She went silent. Even when she was seventeen Ryuzaki had fascinated her. She remembered even through her grief being shocked when they brought him on to her case. Watari, who she met first, assured her Ryuzaki was the world's best, that he happened to be in Tokyo and was interested in solving her case. Why hers? She couldn't believe it at the time. That barefooted freak was who they thought would solve the case? Regardless of her misgivings, she was proven wrong.

"Misa?"

She let out a breath, "Sorry, lost in thought. Yeah, he's important. That's all."

* * *

Misa wandered aimlessly around her apartment peeking through the gauzy dark curtains to gaze at the city lights. The rain that softly spattered on her window echoed in her quiet apartment. Her phone lay black and silent on her bedside table along with a cup of tea she let go cold hours ago.

Two full weeks passed since her meeting with Ryuzaki. She was grateful for her day with Naomi to distract her, but now that she was alone she felt ill at ease.

It was nearing midnight, but she felt no urge to sleep. Just restless, wishing she could hear from him already. She wondered what he was like when he wasn't working on a case. Was he ever not working on one? She thought of his dark circles and guessed he probably wasn't asleep either. The thought gave her some comfort.

She remembered what Naomi said about him having a girlfriend and felt a twinge of irritation. He was strange enough that she probably didn't have to worry about that, she reasoned. Not that him having a girlfriend was something she would worry over. He might even be a _virgin_ still. She stifled a giggle and then sighed. She was the weird one obsessing over the sex life of a man with bad posture and a sugar addiction.

Her phone dinged from beside her bed and she all but flew across the room to check it. Instead of a call from Ryuzaki, however, it was another dm from the same twitter account as before.

She froze. Her stomach dropped as she opened it. Inside, a string of hundreds of rose emojis lit up the screen. She frowned at it, thumb quickly scrolling through to the bottom where they had also typed, "Enjoy." A knock then sounded ominously at her apartment door.

She jerked her head towards the security camera where she could see a delivery man setting a box in front of her door and walking away. Her heart pounded furiously in her ears, her breathing accelerated. Panic was beginning to reach a crescendo inside of her before the phone rang in her hands.

An unfamiliar number.

She stared down at it in mute horror before sliding a shaking finger across to answer, "H-hello?"

"It's me."

She clutched at her chest, "Ryuzaki!"

"I'm monitoring your security camera. Don't open the door and don't get the package. I'm on my way."

Misa looked at the security screen again where the unassuming box lay. She was struck with a terrifying thought.

"What if it's a bomb or something?"

"I highly doubt that, but just in case I have a team with me to assist. Just stay where you are. I'll be there soon."

"Please don't hang up!" She pleaded, tears springing into her eyes, "Please, I'm so scared. Don't leave me alone."

The phone was silent for a beat before he answered, "I'll stay on the line until we arrive at your building."

Liquid dread coursed through her veins. She only had one way in and out of the apartment. If something happened before he arrived, she had no way out unless she wanted to jump from her window. The thought turned her stomach.

"Go sit down" he suggested.

She curled herself in a corner of her living room on the floor where she could still see the screen. She breathed heavily into the phone.

"You're having a panic attack. You should control your breathing."

"I'm fine." She lied, her eyes locked onto the box on the screen.

"You should distract yourself. Talk about your day."

She could hardly think. Her heart still beat frantically in her chest, "I don't-I don't know."

"You do." He insisted, "Did you work today?"

She thought back to Naomi at the photo shoot and said in an unsteady whisper. "Yes. I had a photo shoot."

"What else?"

"I visited my friend."

"What did you talk about?"

Bits and pieces now came back, the black waves of panic began to ebb slowly away. She thought back to their conversation and blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "Whether or not you have a girlfriend."

His voice sounded slightly amused when he spoke. "And what was your conclusion?”

"She said you might, but I think you're too weird." _No shut up too honest, too honest!_ And despite her fear, she felt her face go red.

She heard him say something muffled to someone he was with along with the sound of car doors slamming.

"We're here. Stay where you are."

The line went dead. She scrambled up from her crouched position to watch the security cam. A minute later a group of men dressed in black tactical gear approached the box cautiously and scanned it with a device before carefully hauling it off.

Her phone lit up, she answered immediately.

"You can open the door now Misa."

She hugged her robe to her trembling body and unlatched the door, flinging it open.

Ryuzaki stepped in shaking the rain off his shaggy hair. She shut the door quickly behind him, locking it again.

"Well what's in it?" She asked hurriedly.

"I'm not sure yet. It's not explosive, but my team will have it tested and we'll know soon enough."

She sighed and slumped onto the couch, but sat up almost immediately. "Ryuzaki if he was watching me, he'll know what happened!"

He nodded, "Yes, I was hoping as much. We'll see what move he makes now. I've been monitoring your security camera closely and I haven't seen anyone suspicious by your apartment."

"What about the delivery guy?"

"He was paid to deliver after hours over the phone. He had no idea what he was delivering."

Misa groaned slumping back again. "This is so frustrating. What does he want, a date? To kill me? What is his goal here?"

Ryuzaki looked out the front window of her apartment, poking back the sheer curtain with a long finger.

"What were you doing when I called?"

"I was sitting on the floor freaking out! You know that."

"That's what his goal is."

Misa said nothing as he continued studying the view from her window.

"You, cowering on the floor in fear is exactly what he's after."

She swallowed the rising lump in her throat, "So what, I just pretend I'm not afraid of him?"

"I'd start first with using your blinds more often. I was able to see you get undressed tonight."

Misa's fear was briefly replaced with shock as she gasped, "You _what_?"

He shrugged, "You wanted me to help and part of that is seeing where there's weakness in your security. Your windows are basically open for anyone to look into."

She grit her teeth, "Fine, consider it done. Anything else you pervert?"

He tapped his chin thinking for a moment, "To address what you asked before: yes, you do need to act as though his actions don't affect you. Go about your life as normal. Don't change your routine just yet. Tomorrow I'll let you know what we find in the package."

"How do I get a hold of you?" She asked worriedly, "Can I text the number you called me from?"

"Hmm I think so..." He dug into the pocket of his worn jeans producing a small cell phone... only it was absolutely ancient.

"Oh my god how old is that thing?" Misa exclaimed in horror. The battered flip phone had seen better days. The silver sheen had flecked off leaving it nearly black around the edges and the small display screen on the front was cracked in the corner.

He looked slightly affronted, "I've had this model for years, it's very reliable. Unlike modern smartphones, it's less likely to be hacked into. Considering your situation you should look into getting one."

"I'm not getting a flip phone." She said firmly, "The stalker can have me. I bet you can't even take a selfie on that thing."

He ignored this, "I do have to insist you not call me unnecessarily."

"And what about texting?" She asked.

"Yes, I suppose that's fine just don't expect a quick response."

"On that thing? Trust me I won't."

He glanced down at her and then quickly at his phone again, "It's late. I believe you have another photoshoot early in the morning you should try to sleep."

Reluctantly, she agreed. Though, privately she reasoned it wasn't _that_ late and maybe she could ask him to stay and talk a while...until she remembered something.

"Ryuzaki wait one sec!"

She ran back into her bedroom and dug quickly through the side table and brought out the envelope full of money she saved for him.

She handed it to him with a small bow, "I think we missed discussing payment when we met last time. I wanted to make sure I gave you something."

He was quiet, staring down at the plain white envelope with a strange expression, holding it between two fingers as if it were dirty. She babbled on nervously.

"I'm glad I've been setting aside money. I just didn't know it would be for something like this! Um...if that's not enough let me know!"

"That won't be necessary." He handed it back to her.

She tried pressing it into his hands, "No really, take it, I wanna help!"

He shook his head, pushing the envelope more firmly back to her. "I told you: I take on cases I find interesting I don't necessarily do this for the money and besides; I can already tell you I'm paid much more than what you've put in there."

"But isn't there something I can do?" She asked dejectedly, "Having to catch this guy is probably expensive and you've even got a team to help you now I just feel-"

"Cake."

"Huh?"

"I'll take payment from you in the form of cake."

She watched him a moment as he scratched the back of his head, "I'm not picky on flavor."

She let out a giggle and smiled up at him, "Alright. It's a deal."

She locked the door behind him as he left and watched his tall figure disappear through the security cam.

Feeling paranoid, she drew the blinds on her windows. _No more free shows perverts_. She glanced down at her robe which had slid open slightly. She couldn't help but feel a little insulted that he maintained his composure while she was prancing around practically half naked.

She crawled into bed, taking her phone with her so she could text him.

M: Thank you for your help tonight Ryuzaki you're the best!

She lay back in bed staring at the ceiling. Her panic had dissolved away entirely leaving her feeling especially exhausted. Though the ordeal made her worry, she felt safer knowing Ryuzaki was looking out for her.

He had to have been very close at one point, she mused, for him to have seen her undress...The idea didn't bother her as much as it should have and a small, completely irrational part of her brain wanted to keep her curtains open to give him another show sometime. She shook her head at this. _Wow, I need a boyfriend._ If only she didn't have an actual pervert after her.

She turned over, tugging the blankets up to her chin. Without that stalker however, Ryuzaki probably would have never come back into her life at all. The thought made her feel strangely empty.

Her phone beeped.

She reached for it and read his response:

R: You're welcome. And you can tell your friend you were right, by the way, I don't.

M: huh? don't what?

R: Have a girlfriend. Goodnight.

Misa threw her head back on the pillow, her hands covering her face, feeling warm beneath her fingers. _I was right he's too weird for one._ She buried herself into the covers and let herself smile alone and unseen.

* * *

"So that was Misa-Misa!"

"Who?"

"The model! Matsuda has her poster in his cubicle."

A group of detectives stood in front of the coffee machine in the kitchen, talking excitedly among themselves.

"Ah I guess it's hard being that popular." Said one sagely, "That's who we're detailing then?"

"Looks like it."

He let out a low whistle, loosening his tie.

"I wish I could have met her." Matsuda said wistfully. He grinned as L now approached the group of men, trying to get by them to refill on some much needed caffeine.

"I even saw Ryuzaki buying a magazine she was in recently too."

L's hand hovered for a moment over the coffee pot before answering, "Yes, for research purposes."

"I definitely plan on doing my own research if you know what I mea-" he stopped when he saw L give him a sharp look and quickly excused himself along with the other detectives.

L carried his sugar laden coffee out of the kitchen and stopped Watari who was passing by, "Do me a favor: make sure _that_ one is put on desk duty for a while."

Watari raised his eyebrows, but nodded as L set off to his temporary office.

He threw himself down on the hard leather couch, grunting on impact. He turned to the side table, pulling out the magazine in question, thumbing through it until he reached Misa's spread. On one side she wore a tight red leather mini dress with a matching garter belt that she seemed to be in the middle of unbuckling. The other side she was draped in nothing but black silk sheets, artfully covering the more risque parts of her body, her hazel eyes half lidded, her bright red lips blowing a phantom kiss. His mind flashed back to her apartment where in the middle of their conversation her robe had drifted partway open revealing a tantalizing eye full of cleavage. He shut the magazine quickly.

His watch beeped at him: heart rate elevated. She was bad for his health.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the feedback on the first chapter! This really is just a very self-indulgent fic for me, but I'm having so much fun writing it and knowing there's even a small group of fellow LxMisa shippers out there enjoying it warms my heart.
> 
> Some notes: L/Lawliet=Ryuzaki, as with the original story it's an alias. Hopefully that'll become more clear as the story progresses. I also wanted to make it clear if it isn't already by the rating: smut will most definitely be happening. I wouldn't necessarily classify this as a slow burn per se, but it won't happen right away either.


	3. The Broken Glass

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__

_  
I know my course. The spirit that I have seen  
May be the devil: and the devil hath power  
To assume a pleasing shape. _

_-Hamlet, Act 2 Scene 2_

* * *

  
Misa bounced in place, frantically pressing the elevator button, trying to get the doors to open faster. She glanced down at her phone: 6:47, nearly an hour late. She slept in much later than she meant to after the stressful night.

All night her dreams were plagued by shadowy men reaching out, offering her roses from dark corners. She woke up more than once, gasping in fear, thinking a coat hanging up in the corner was a man.

As the elevator doors slid open she rushed through the corridor, looking down to check her phone, until bumping straight into someone. A hand shot out, gripping her arm and steadied her before she fell backwards. She looked up startled to see a handsome man, dressed in a crisp navy blue suit. He had chestnut hair and soft eyes. He apologized, reaching to grab her phone and keys that fell when they collided. Recognition flashed behind his eyes when they met hers.

"I don't think we've formally met." He said, handing her things over, "I'm Light Yagami"

"Are you a new model here or something?" She said distractedly. She wanted to be polite, but she was tired and already very late. She looked over his shoulder on tip-toes where she could see the door to the studio.

"Not quite," he said smiling, "But I'm flattered. My father is the CEO of Facade."

Her agency. Misa felt the blood drain from her face.

Light laughed at her expression, "I'm just here visiting."

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!" She said nervously, "I had no idea his son would be here. I'm kind of embarrassed to be seen like this..." She had rushed out of her apartment that morning without putting her usual care into her appearance. She tugged nervously at her black ruffled skirt, hoping when they bumped into each other nothing was exposed.

"Don't be. You're a natural." He encouraged and then added bashfully, "I actually had one of your posters in my dorm in college so meeting you is kind of a dream."

Misa's face lit up at this, "Really? I appreciate the support!"

"Where are you rushing off to?"

"I'm filming a commercial today and I'm pretty late." She admitted, somewhat embarrassed. "So really I'm just postponing the lecture I'll get."

"Well we can't have that, can we?" He murmured, "What studio are you in today?"

She pointed to the door around the corner. He nodded resolutely, heading off in that direction, with her scurrying to follow behind him.

The director of the shoot that day was an irate, red-faced little man who had worked with the agency for nearly 20 years and was well-known for his explosive temper. He'd made nearly every model he worked with cry more than once and in fact seemed to revel in it. He was a favorite at Facade however, so complaints against him fell on deaf ears.

He was waiting by the door when they entered, no doubt ready to ream Misa the moment she came in, but at the sight of Light he blanched.

"Mr.Yagami! To what do we owe the pleasure?"

Light smiled, "I actually came here to apologize. I've kept one of your models out and made her late."

The directors eyes shifted quickly from Light to Misa, "Well, we were just saying we needed the extra time to set up, so really we're grateful sir!"

 _Kiss-ass,_ Misa thought, but she enjoyed seeing the director sweat. Light surveyed the room with interest.

"I've actually never been on set for a commercial before." He remarked, looking around at the assistants and crew members who gawked at him. "I'd love to observe today if that's alright?"

"Of course!" The director cried, "Of course let's find you a comfortable place to watch. Kana!" He snapped his fingers at one of the other models, "You and Amane get to the dressing room."

Misa was then ushered off along with the other model to get her hair and makeup done. Kana whispered in her ear as they left, "How did you snag the CEO's son?"

"I didn't _snag_ him." Misa said indignantly, "He bumped into me!"

In the dressing room a stylist helped lace Misa in a black velvet bustier with panels of scalloped lace. Kana, who was dressed in a similar style but in ivory, peeked through the dressing room door out onto the set.

"God he's handsome." She gushed, "I'm so glad it's a lingerie commercial."

Misa muffled a snicker as she pulled the sheer black thigh highs up.

She shot Misa a glare, "Don't tell me you're gunning for him too?"

Misa rolled her eyes, "Not exactly. You shouldn't be either. You know we're not allowed."

Kana stuck out her tongue playfully, "He's the CEO's son. I think we can break a few rules for him."

Misa may have flouted the rules once or twice when she was very new, but quickly learned it wasn't worth it. The stress of almost getting caught, the worries of losing her coveted position; it was too much of a risk. She also wasn't sure getting involved with the CEO's son would be a smart move either. Though, she wasn't blind; he was insanely handsome and she was grateful for the distraction after the terrifying night.

Throughout the shoot she snuck glances at Light who watched over the production. He wandered around asking questions, pointing at various camera equipment with interest. Occasionally he'd give her an encouraging smile which she'd return eagerly.

More than a few of the crew members were whispering amongst themselves about him, wondering if he was single or if he'd be up to getting drinks with the crew when they were finished.

"He acts like a prince." Kana sighed while Light held the door open for a grateful assistant carrying in lighting equipment. She had to agree. She'd not heard much about the CEO's son aside from the fact that he would probably be taking his fathers place in the upcoming year once he retired. She felt hopeful about it now that she met him. Maybe under his leadership models would be safer in situations like hers.

She remembered what Ryuzaki said about the industry not taking care of the models in it. He was right. This stalker wasn't her first, but certainly the most threatening she'd dealt with. She knew many models who had dealt with overly friendly "fans", with just as little support. Light, she hoped, possessed more compassion than the other men in charge.

To the delight of everyone on set, Light had an enormous amount of expensive food catered when they took a break for lunch. The atmosphere on set warmed up even more towards him after that. If there was one way to win over a crew it was through good food.

"That was so sweet of you." Misa remarked as they walked together outside of the studio in the late afternoon. He invited her out to talk with him while he waited for his driver to pick him up. "I don't know how to thank you for today."

"You could let me take you out tonight?" He suggested smoothly.

She stopped in her tracks, her eyes going wide, "Oh, but I don't...I mean, I'm not really allowed to go on dates." She explained.

"It wouldn't be a date then, just a nice night out." He said grinning and then leaning forward he added conspiratorially, "With the CEO's son can you really afford to say no?"

She laughed at this, but before she could think of an answer to give, her phone rang: Ryuzaki.

"Excuse me a sec!" She asked before stepping away to answer.

"Ryuzaki?"

"We have the contents of the box." He said without preamble.

"What was in it?"

"Roses. Like the picture he sent before. Nothing overtly dangerous, but I'd like to get together to discuss it in person. Come to the address I send you when you're done there."

"Oh okay," she glanced over her shoulder to see Light waiting politely. "I gotta go. I'll see you then."

She hung up and turned back to Light. She slipped her phone back in her purse and smiled at him.

"Sorry about that."

"Boyfriend?"

Misa shook her head emphatically, "No! Nothing like that, but I do have somewhere I have to be tonight unfortunately."

His expression was unreadable for just a moment before he reached into the breast pocket of his jacket, producing a small card.

"Here," he said, holding it out to her, "I'll give you my number. Don't worry, I won't even ask for yours. Shoot me a text sometime when you're free. No pressure."

She smiled apologetically, "Okay...I'm sorry about all of this. Today is just a little crazy."

"Should I do something crazier to grab your attention?" He teased.

She giggled at this, "No thanks, I've got all the crazy my life can handle." She smiled shyly, looking up at him through her lashes, "Besides, I think you've got my attention."

At that moment his ride pulled up with a man hopping out hastily to hold the door open for him. Light leaned forward, his mouth hovering near the shell of her ear, "I'm so glad to hear it." Goosebumps erupted along her arms.

He gave her another dazzling smile as he got into the waiting vehicle. She watched him leave before glancing down at the business card she still held, thinking that she may have to keep _that_ particular encounter a secret from Kana.

* * *

The address Ryuzaki told her to go to looked to be a large, sleek apartment building that loomed Intimidatingly above her. She looked at the text again: top floor. She walked inside unsure, holding a small container of cake she had gone home quickly to prepare for him. A man in a plain suit approached her.

"Miss Amane?" He asked.

She nodded as he bowed, "I'm Shuichi Aizawa. I'm with Ryuzaki. We're located upstairs, he asked that I escort you."

"This is what Ryuzaki is using as an office?" She asked confused.

The agent shrugged as he directed her towards the elevator, "He said this would be more comfortable for him. He's using the penthouse."

"May I ask, how many people are working with him...with Ryuzaki?"

The agent thought for a moment, "I'm not sure. He has a few of us on call as needed."

"And he pays you guys?" She asked puzzled.

"Oh yes he's compensating us quite generously. Though I think a few would of them have done it for free just so they could put working with him on their resume."

All she could think of was how expensive it all sounded while she carried her own meager contribution to the operation in a small plastic container. Just how much money was he pouring into helping her?

The elevator doors finally slid open to reveal the foyer into the penthouse. It was enormous and seemed to be made nearly entirely of glass windows that overlooked the city around them. Some of the rooms they passed had walls that were partially transparent with frosted glass.

It was decorated somewhat strangely though; the furniture was distinctly European, down to the tea set sitting on the mahogany coffee table in the large living area. She noticed someone familiar standing by giving her a crinkly eyed smile.

"Watari!" She said delighted.

He smiled warmly at her, "It's nice to see you again."

Watari worked exclusively with Ryuzaki, though she couldn't quite figure out if their relationship was familial or not. He was especially kind to her when her parents died and was the one who brought Ryuzaki onto her case.

He gestured towards the large couch for her to settle down on where Ryuzaki waited biting his thumb.

"Ryuzaki this place is nuts!" She exclaimed looking around. The windows in the living area had billowy white curtains drawn against the brightness of the setting sun.

"They don't mind you using it like this." She asked him concerned, "You're using the entire penthouse?"

"Why would anyone mind? I own the building."

Misa nearly choked, "You _what?"_

Ryuzaki looked at her in mild surprise, "I said: I own the building. The penthouse is mine too, of course, I just prefer to stay outside of Tokyo when I visit, but since you're located closer this made the most sense." He poured himself tea from a delicate looking silver tea pot, adding in an obscene amount of sugar cubes. "This also has helicopter access if I need it." He added casually.

She was stunned. Even as they spoke he perched on a couch that was most likely worth more than her entire apartment, in frayed jeans he probably owned since before the first time they met years ago. It made no sense to her.

She was successful as a model, but no where near the realm of owning an entire apartment building. She glanced down at the small container of cake she brought suddenly feeling very inadequate.

"Is that for me?" He asked, his eyes lighting up.

"Yeah...This is why I was a little late."

She reached hesitantly for a small silver plate and served him a slice.

"What type of cake is this?" Ryuzaki asked, holding the plate up to eye level, examining it closely, "There's no frosting...pound cake?"

"Honey Castella" she replied softly, "My mom used to make it for me. It's her recipe."

"Ah." He stuffed a forkful in his mouth. She sat awkwardly for a moment as he ate, watching him closely, waiting to see if he liked it or not.

"Well, do you like it?"

Ryuzaki nodded, already grabbing for another piece.

"That was kind of you." Watari remarked as Misa offered him a piece as well.

She blushed, "It's really the least I can do. I haven't made sweets in a long time, you know since my parents...so when Ryuzaki asked to be paid in cake I-"

Ryuzaki coughed.

Watari's eyes moved between the two of them with a small smile. "I see. I'm glad to hear it."

"We should discuss the contents of the box." Ryuzaki said, setting his empty plate back down, "I was going to discard of the flowers. Unless for some reason you want keep them?"

The roses currently sat in a battered cardboard box on the coffee table, their deep red petals slightly wilted. She shook her head.

"I don't even wanna touch them."

"Then that leads me to security. This man, and I'm assuming it's a man based on the behavior, is escalating. The messages, the pictures, the package. I don't say this to scare you, only to make you aware."

"You said I should continue my life like normal right?" She asked, nervously twisting the hem of her skirt. She wondered how on earth she could possibly continue pretending nothing had changed when he was apparently escalating. What did he plan to escalate up to next?

"Yes. He knows you're a model so he may know that your agency won't be of any help. We don't know for sure yet if he's aware you've contacted authorities for assistance, but I have a suspicion he does after last night. I'm sure he was watching very closely."

She took a steadying breath, nodding as he continued.

"We're not yet to the point of having someone from my team to follow you for your safety, but if that case does arise I have plans in place..." He trailed off as an agent entered, looking grim.

"Could you excuse us please Misa." Ryuzaki murmured frowning. Misa nodded glumly and left the men alone, wandering over to a sliding glass door that lead to the expansive balcony.

She stepped out and was greeted to a breathtaking view of the city. She leaned on the railing as a warm, balmy breeze with the promise of rain ruffled her hair.

"It's a lovely view."

Watari had followed her and looked out over the city with her. He mopped his sweaty forehead with a handkerchief, "A little warm perhaps."

"It's pretty." She said quietly.

"Something wrong?" He asked concerned.

"To be honest, I'm uncomfortable." She confessed. "I know I wanted his help, but after seeing how much time and money he's spending I feel bad. He could be helping someone more important than me."

The old man looked at her with sympathy, "And what makes you less important than anyone else?"

She shrugged. She didn't know much about Ryuzaki other than that he was a world renowned private detective. She recalled the excited whispers among the police when he took her parents case, how every detective clamored to get his advice, how he had apparently caught terrorists, serial killers, arsonists. In the years since they parted she would try looking him up occasionally, but internet searches came up largely empty.

"Well, I'm not a politician who needs protection or a serial killer who needs catching. I'm just a model with a stalker."

"Hmm." Watari thought for a moment, "This is how he handles every case he works on. He gives it everything he has."

"So, I'm not special then." Misa sighed, looking down at the streets below with a sad smile, internally frustrated with herself for being so contradictory.

Watari chuckled softly, "Oh, I wouldn't say that."

"Misa." She turned to see Ryuzaki waving her back in.

"Is something wrong?" She asked as she stepped back inside. Aizawa looked slightly stressed whereas Ryuzaki's pensive face revealed nothing.

"One of the windows in your apartment was broken. He left a flower." Aizawa explained.

"A rose, to be exact." Ryuzaki said thoughtfully, "He seems to be upset you didn't personally accept his gift."

"You think?" She replied exasperated, already drained at the thought of cleaning up glass and dealing with a more irate stalker. "He wants to scare me, but sends me flowers. Then he gets mad at me? If he wants me so bad shouldn't he be...I don't know, nicer?"

"This man isn't playing by normal rules." Ryuzaki explained, "It's about power and control. You denied him the act of watching you open the box. In his mind you took something from him and so he's punishing you for it."

"Should I go back there now?" She asked, watching as Ryuzaki paced around the room, thinking intently. He seemed to get an idea.

"No." He said decisively, "I'll have someone sent to clean it up tomorrow. You can stay here for tonight."

She suddenly felt very warm. "Here?"

"Yes, I have several unused guest rooms. Unless you'd be more comfortable elsewhere?"

She briefly thought of Naomi, who had plenty of room and would surely let Misa stay with her in a heartbeat, but Misa quickly replied, "No...Here is fine."

* * *

She tentatively padded out to the dimly lit kitchen, long after the others had gone home. She could not possibly sleep, too acutely aware that they were the only two there. Through one of the sets of semi-transparent sliding glass doors, she could see Ryuzaki who sat hunched in front of a computer. He'd probably be there all night which gave her an idea.

While the coffee brewed she looked through the fridge for snacks. Unsurprisingly, real food was scarce. There was a small glass pitcher of water, a half empty carton of cream and a container of fresh strawberries. _How are you so rich, but have nothing to eat_ she thought irritably. The cabinets were loaded with foreign looking sweets and half opened packages of cookies. She grabbed the strawberries, thinking they were by a large margin the most nutritious item in the apartment.

The warm aroma of coffee now filled the kitchen. She hummed softly to herself as she poured some in a cup, setting it neatly on a tray along with the strawberries and sugar cubes. She remembered the cake she brought and quickly opened the container sitting on the marble island, putting the last slice on a plate for him. She stood back, admiring her work. Something about the whole act of bringing him a snack at night while he worked made her feel somewhat domestic.

"Ryuzaki?" She called timidly outside of his office.

Ryuzaki slid the door open for her, looking at the tray in surprise. "Is something wrong?"

"I'm having a hard time sleeping." She admitted, as she stepped inside to set it carefully on his desk.

"I'm having someone sent to your apartment to clean up the mess and to install more cameras as soon as morning." He said promptly, his eyes straying to the tray, already plunking a few cubes into the coffee.

"Thank you." She said, sitting on the leather couch across from his desk. "What brought that up?"

He settled back in front of the computer. "You can't sleep because you're worried about your stalker, correct?"

_Not entirely_ , she thought, but she smiled knowingly, "So you were trying to comfort me?"

"I suppose..." he muttered, taking an absent minded bite of cake. He continued typing, the light from the computer casting a blue glow on his pale features. He looked as tired as he usually did. His dark eyes darted back and forth reading quickly.

"Why did you become a detective?" She asked suddenly.

He looked up at her, "Why do you ask?"

She shrugged hugging her knees, "I'm just curious. Like, why do you do it?"

He thought for a moment. She watched him choose his words carefully, "I like to solve problems...see justice served. I want to do my part in making the world better."

"But why?" She pressed.

"Everyone should." He said simply, adding, "You wanted justice for your family."

"I did, but that's because they were my family. I loved them. You do this for anyone or at least anyone you find interesting right?"

"I think someone should be looking out for everyone's best interest regardless of whether or not they have a personal stake in their life."

She couldn't read him well, but there was something guarded in his expression that made her question if there was more to it than that. She wondered if there had ever been a time in his life where someone should have been looking out for him. Had someone failed him? She didn't feel it was her place to ask, not yet anyway.

"I guess that's true, but I don't think I could do a job where I deal with bad news all day like you do."

"Well I don't think I could do a job that requires me to wear a thong bikini like _you_ do." He retorted.

At this she fell back on the couch, covering her mouth as she giggled uncontrollably. "You're right, my job is way harder."

She peeked up at him and noticed the corners of his mouth lifted slightly. The closest she'd gotten to a smile from him. It was also the first conversation she had with him that wasn't completely revolved about her stalker. It felt natural. She didn't want to stop, but of course he was the responsible one.

"You should try and get some sleep." He suggested, popping a strawberry into his mouth.

"Yeah yeah, but take your own advice alright?"

He grunted an unintelligible reply, already lost in whatever he was reading on his computer again.

She stood yawning but paused mid-stretch when she noticed something familiar sitting on his shelf. She hadn't released much music, just a few singles that did moderately well in online sales, so she hadn't seen many people purchase physical copies of them. She was touched.

"Did you need something else?" He asked, glancing up from his screen again.

She blushed, quickly stammering out, "N-no! Goodnight Ryuzaki!"

She hurried out of his office and practically floated down the hall, her brain not at all working properly. Her thoughts bounced around her skull in a happy, incoherent little mess.

_He bought my CDs!_

_Do I..._

_No way._

_I'm over thinking this._

_I just haven't had a decent guys attention in a while._ She reasoned with herself, rubbing her face as if she could fade away the scarlet blush that stained her cheeks. _But that's not true_ , said a sly inner voice. _Thats right_. Light Yagami showed her plenty of attention, even asking her out, and while she was certainly flattered by it, it didn't affect her nearly as much. Flirting with him was like flirting with any other guy, but Ryuzaki? There was just something different there.

* * *

L got up stretching, his back ached from being cramped in front of the computer researching all night. He twisted his neck trying to work the knots out to no avail. Misa's stalker, though seemingly infantile and prone to emotional outbursts, had yet to leave a concrete trail for him to follow. The twitter account was a dead end, the package left at her door had no fingerprints. The roses he left were of a standard variety and nearly impossible to trace back to a viable source.

But L knew keeping Misa out all night would be sure to anger him more. Good. He looked forward to seeing what move the petulant child made next.

The sun was beginning to rise over the city. An excellent time for another cup of coffee, he wasn't tired anyway.

He felt an unfamiliar tugging sensation in his chest as he neared the room Misa was in, like a balloon being pulled at the end of a string. He paused when he saw the door left open. She lay curled asleep on the bed inside, her golden hair splayed over the pillow.

He thought back five years earlier to a similar scene of her asleep in an interrogation room, Watari's long grey overcoat laid over the top of her.

_The old man looked at her with pity, "She's a good girl."_

_L looked on indifferently. He could have taken any case he wanted, anywhere in the world. When Watari brought him into the Tokyo precinct, he assumed it was for something different. Already since arriving several agents had approached him asking for professional consultation on several high profile cases. Instead, they stood together outside of a one way mirror watching the interrogation of a teenage girl._

_"She reminds me of you actually." Watari observed. "When you were very young. So angry. So full of hurt."_

_L watched her closely as she was shaken awake by an officer. For nearly an hour she argued passionately with the exasperated interviewer. Her arms crossed over her chest, looking away in defiance. Once the man left the room however, she lay her head on the table exhausted, tears streaming down her miserable face._

_"Tell them to stop treating her like a suspect." L said annoyed, "It's obvious she's not."_

_"They think she had something to do with it." Watari explained gravely, "Double homicide in a peaceful neighborhood. They want this wrapped up quickly. They'll try to pin it on her."_

_L's eyes met hers through the window, though she didn't know it._

_"Will you let that happen?"_

Of course he wouldn't.

The sun came in through a crack in the curtains, casting a beam of light across her peaceful face. She exhaled softly through her parted lips, hugging her pillow with a sleepy moan. Whatever nebulous thread that reached through the one way glass those many years ago, still tethered Misa to him now...or was it the other way around? He backed out of the room quietly, sliding the door shut, thinking perhaps he may need some sleep after all.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if you're like me you may be thinking, "CDs? I thought this was a modern AU!" But apparently they're still relatively big in Japan. According to an article I read, 71% of their music sales is physical media like CDs, so it made sense to have L purchase them. Though, I also like the idea of L just kinda being stuck in the past in some ways (like his old ass flip-phone).
> 
> As always thanks for reading, your comments are so encouraging and keep me going!


	4. The Meeting

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_Sometimes I have the strangest feeling about you. Especially when you are near me as you are now. It feels as though I had a string tied here under my left rib where my heart is, tightly knotted to you in a similar fashion. And when you go to Ireland, with all that distance between us, I am afraid that this cord will be snapped, and I shall bleed inwardly._

_-Charlotte Brontë_

* * *

"So he left you another flower?”

Misa watched as Naomi knelt on the balcony outside of her apartment, apparently searching for any clues. Her lips were pursed in worry, her dark brows knitted together in concentration. She pushed back a tendril of hair that had come loose from the low messy bun Misa had insisted on helping her do. Whoever Ryuzaki sent to clean up did a good enough job, but remnants of the glass still glittered in corners under the hot sun over a week later.

Misa nodded, glancing up at the shiny new security camera installed at her front entrance. The morning after she woke up at Ryuzaki's penthouse, Aizawa was waiting to take her home, without her even having a chance to say good morning to Ryuzaki.

"A rose." Misa clarified. "I guess he's trying to be romantic again."

"I'm so glad you weren't home." Naomi said standing and patting off her jeans.

"That's what confuses me though." Misa said as she locked the door. "He seems to know where I am all the time. Why did he wait until I wasn't there to break my window? Wouldn't it scare me more if I was there to see it happen?"

"Are you saying he made sure you weren't home?"

Misa shrugged as the two women headed down the stairs towards Naomi's car. "It kinda seems like it doesn't it? Like...I don't know, maybe he didn't want me to get hurt? Ryuzaki seems to think he's just trying to scare me."

Naomi paused with her hand on the door handle. "It's true men like that are after fear and domination. They usually follow a pattern."

A pattern that was accelerating according to Ryuzaki. Misa was grateful that the last week had been relatively quiet. No pictures, no messages, no unwanted packages. She had no time to feel relief however, deciding that it was likely the calm before the storm. Watari would often be waiting for her after she finished a photoshoot. He sat in his vehicle with a friendly smile, ready to drive her home. She appreciated his company, but couldn't stop herself from squinting through the tinted windows every time to see if Ryuzaki was in the back seat waiting. He never was.

"What is this meeting about by the way?" Naomi asked.

"I don't know." Misa replied unconcerned. "They just said to to come in at noon, but it's probably about a new brand deal or something."

She received an email requesting her to show up on her day off to an meeting. She asked Naomi for a ride there, partly because she felt bad always riding with Watari and also because she just wanted to spend time with her. Naomi's calm demeanor was incredibly soothing to be around after the stress of the last few months. She even convinced her to stay with her for a few days, much to Naomi's chagrin as it meant she was forced to be Misa's dress up doll. She noticed Naomi eyeing the bright red manicure Misa gave her dubiously as she drove, noting it would be a miracle if she didn't pick it all off by the time she finished her meeting.

As Naomi parked outside of Facade, she turned in her seat to face Misa.

"You know I'm here for you. If this detective of yours can't do more, let me know. I just want you to be safe."

Misa smiled lightly, looking down to fiddle with her hair. "Thank you. He's doing great though I mean...aren't you wondering where I stayed that night?"

Naomi's mouth fell open. "Misa!"

She giggled at Naomi's scandalized expression. "Nothing happened! I slept in a guest room all alone. He was very respectful as usual."

"You sound disappointed." Naomi commented slyly.

Misa blushed. "Not at all."

She knew nothing would happen of course. But she did secretly hope he would have been there when she woke up that morning and that their conversation the night before would have at least jump started some sort of friendship. So far no amount of reaching out to him brought her any closer. She tried texting him throughout the week without receiving a single response back, leaving her feeling lonely and ignored.

Naomi smiled indulgently, "I have to admit: it's nice seeing you like this, even if I wish it were under better circumstances. I'll have to meet him sometime and make sure he's suitable for you."

Misa went even more red, "You're talking as if anything will ever happen. I really don't think he sees me that way."

"Maybe not now because he's focused on helping you-which by the way is a good thing-but you won't have a stalker after you forever. Who's to say what the future holds?"

That was her dilemma though. What happened after she didn't need his help anymore? That question kept her up at night nearly as much as her stalker did. Ryuzaki vanished completely from her life the last time. No goodbyes, no way to contact him. He was her hero and then he was gone the day after the trial ended, leaving behind an impression that still lay so deeply upon her. Little things he did now, she noticed, were starting to press into her heart far too quickly for her to simply brush aside. It frightened her. She could already tell when they did part again, it would be much more difficult to bare.

"I better go in." Misa said quickly, "Wish me luck. And thank you for looking out for me."

To her dismay, the meeting wasn't over a brand deal like she initially thought, but instead Misa was directed immediately to the office of Soichiro Yagami, the CEO of Facade.

He sat on one side of a long conference table along with another man she didn't recognize. She'd never met the CEO before and sincerely wished someone had told her beforehand who exactly the meeting was with, because of course she chose that day to wear torn fishnets under her short skirt. She pulled nervously on her plunging corseted blouse trying to look a little more professional.

The CEO was a stern looking man with graying hair and square glasses. He gestured to a seat across the table where she was shocked to see Ryuzaki sitting.

"Please have a seat Miss Amane."

She took the chair next to Ryuzaki, who was of course perched in his usual very _unusual_ way. She felt a mixture of anxiety and embarrassment, mentally willing him to act like a normal human being for once.

The CEO introduced the man next to him as a lawyer named Setsuo Takahashi, who represented the agency.

"I've been told you hired this man here because of a situation with a fan, is that correct?" As he said it he inclined his head towards Ryuzaki, with a look of disdain, clearly not impressed by Ryuzaki's casual state of dress and odd mannerisms.

'Hired' was a generous interpretation she thought, considering he refused her money and asked to be paid in cake of all things. She glanced sideways at Ryuzaki apprehensively, "Yes, I didn't know where else to turn."

Mr. Yagami looked grave adjusting his glasses which glinted ominously under the fluorescent lights. "You could have told someone here surely?"

"I did." Misa replied, "I told my manager about it months ago when it started."

Mr. Takahashi spoke with an unpleasant smile on his face. "I believe you were also told to follow up periodically with that manager to make sure all was going well, but you chose not to."

"Because I wasn't getting any help!" Misa said fiercely, her voice now rising, "They told me I should be grateful for the attention!"

Ryuzaki held a hand up to quiet her. She scowled at the lawyer. What right did he have to assume she didn't do anything? She always took the proper measures, but why bother following up when their answer would be useless?

The lawyer shrugged as he waved a hand dismissively. "These things happen. Every model has the occasional...let’s call them, overly-dedicated fan. Perhaps If you can't handle the pressure you should seek employment elsewhere?"

Misa panicked at hearing this, wondering if she should have just kept her mouth shut. She glanced at Ryuzaki to see his reaction only to find he was actually smiling.

"Misa Amane is your best selling model, you'd be incredibly foolish to lose her." He said, finally speaking up. "But if that's how you feel I have several connections within the media who would be interested to learn more on how Facade mishandled not only her stalking case, but the numerous others you've swept under the rug."

Mr. Yagami now leaned forward frowning. "What other cases?"

"Two years ago a model listed under your agency, Asami Ito age 19, went missing. A similar situation to Miss Amane, a fan sent threatening messages and photographs. Her concerns were pushed aside as well. She hasn't been seen since."

Mr. Takahashi sat back with a harsh laugh, "I remember the model you're referring to. She didn't show up to 3 consecutive photo shoots and according to her contract she was dropped. What happens after that isn't a problem that concerns the agency."

"The safety of your models doesn't concern you?" Ryuzaki asked cocking his head in question, his eyes focusing on Mr. Yagami who looked uncomfortable and clearly unaware of any disappearance.

The lawyer again brushed this off, "She probably got a boyfriend and left the modeling world it happens."

"It happened again," Ryuzaki continued, "Nearly a year later. This time Yori Nakamura, age 21. She went missing after a meet and greet. She filed multiple complaints about a man following her home at night. She too hasn't been seen or heard from since."

The room was silent. Even Misa hadn't known about any models going missing. True, sometimes she heard about one abruptly leaving the agency without notice or rumors about landing a better gig elsewhere, but now she questioned if that had always been the case after all. If she hadn't contacted him, would she have ended up like them too? She shuddered at the thought.

Ryuzaki leaned forward his dark eyes set intently on Mr. Yagami. "You need to be made aware of what's happening within your agency. The more I research, the more I believe it may be an in-house problem you're dealing with."

At this Mr. Takahashi's face went red with anger, "Just what are you insinuating?"

"If you even remotely care about the safety of your employees, or at least keeping this agency afloat without a scandal, I'd be sure to hire me to investigate further."

The lawyers mouth fell slack, taken aback by Ryuzaki's audacity. "Is this a joke? What makes you think we'd ever hire you after the disrespect you've shown?"

"Because you only have the two options." Ryuzaki said grimly, "Either you accept my help and allow me to investigate or I go to the press and expose you from there. Either way, I'll get what I want. I only came here today as a courtesy to my client. Rest assured if Miss Amane or any model currently employed here, is harmed due to your negligence, I'll make sure your agency is held accountable to the fullest extent of the law."

Mr. Yagami seemed to be struggling for words. "I still don't understand why we should trust you."

Fortuitously, the phone in the middle of the table lit up with an incoming call. Ryuzaki nodded at it. "That phone call may help you make your decision."

Mystified, Mr. Yagami picked up the phone, his eyes focused on Ryuzaki. Almost immediately his face went pale.

"I see. Very well. No, I think I know what we have to do."

He hung up. He drummed his fingers on the table for a moment, his eyes searching around the room. He sighed in a defeated sort of manner.

"Consider yourself hired."

The lawyer looked at him aghast. "Sir?"

"He has full authority to investigate as he sees fit." Mr. Yagami said as he rubbed his temple, his eyes closed as if the room were suddenly very bright.

Mr. Takahashi looked bewildered. "I don't understand sir, are you sure?"

Mr. Yagami looked up, speaking directly to the detective.

"Do what you need to. Just don't allow this out to the press. Handle it quietly."

"Done."

Ryuzaki now stood up, gesturing for Misa to do the same. She awkwardly tugged her skirt down into place as she followed him to the door.

"Ah gentlemen I should mention," He said, pausing at the door. "I've recorded this conversation, so I hope you don't plan to go back on your word. I'll have someone come by for my down payment later."

With that he exited. Misa hurried out the door with him, leaving the two shell-shocked men behind.

"Who called him?" Misa asked breathlessly as they left. "Why did he change his mind so fast?"

"Just some old friends at the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department." Ryuzaki said checking his watch. He turned back to Misa.

"Obviously this constitutes a slight change of plans. You'll need to let me know where you're going at all times from now on, but at least now I don't have to keep hacking into your agencies database."

"But was all that necessary?" She fussed, "What if I lose my job?"

"You won't." He said confidently, "As I told them you're too valuable."

She could sense a sort of subtle electric excitement emanating from him as they walked. It surprised her since his usual disposition was more reserved.

"You seem happy." She observed.

"I like when things go my way. It makes everything much simpler." He said, holding the door for her as they stepped out to the parking lot. She rolled her eyes smiling to herself _that makes you sound like such a kid._

Ryuzaki excused himself to look for Watari who would he driving them back. Not long after she heard someone call her name. She raised a hand to shield her eyes from the brilliant sunlight to look for the source.

"Misa!"

Light waved at her across the parking lot with a friendly smile on his face, though as approached he looked somewhat puzzled.

"There you are." His warm eyes searched hers in concern, "I heard you were having a meeting with my father and some lawyer over a stalker? Is everything alright?"

"Yeah I'm having um...a small problem." she admitted.

"I had no idea that was happening." Light said, his forehead creased in worry as he ran a hand through his hair. "You should have told me the other day I would have helped."

"Oh no, I wouldn't want to drag you down with my problems! Besides I do have a detective helping me."

"So you hired someone?" He asked. "When I heard what was going on I actually thought I could help you out if you needed."

"That's really nice of you, but I think the detective I mentioned is doing a good job it's just-oh here he is actually."

Ryuzaki approached with his hands crammed into his pockets, pausing briefly when he saw Light. The contrast between the two men was almost comical: While Light was dressed more casually than the first time they met, with his charcoal grey suit jacket slung over his arm and his shirt collar unbuttoned, he pulled off a more sophisticated look whereas Ryuzaki simply looked disheveled. Though it wasn't necessarily unattractive to her for some reason.

"Light this is Ryuzaki the detective I mentioned. Ryuzaki this is Mr. Yagami's son."

Light smiled good naturedly, "It's nice to meet you. Thank you for looking after Misa and I hope my father didn't give you any trouble in there."

"None at all." Ryuzaki murmured his eyes narrowing, "Do you work here Light?"

Light raised his eyebrows, "I do. I'll be taking over my fathers position when he retires later this year."

Light turned back to address Misa, "I was actually curious Misa, if you're still doing your meet and greet this weekend?"

Misa covered her mouth, "Oh! I can't believe I almost forgot about it. Yeah of course I wouldn't dream of missing it!"

"Well don't worry then," He said, as he clapped Ryuzaki on the shoulder, "After hearing about all of the trouble she's going through I insist on being there personally to watch over her."

Misa beamed up at him. "That's really sweet of you, but I don't want to take up any of your time."

"Not at all. I'm your fan too remember?" He winked at her and she giggled.

Ryuzaki scrutinized the two of them intently, his tone more clipped as he spoke. "I see. We'll be in contact then. Let's go Misa." At this he placed a hand on Misa's lower back steering her gently, but insistently towards Watari's waiting car.

"So pushy." She whined, but felt unmistakably warm at his touch. She turned back to wave at Light, "Sorry, I'll give you a call or something later!"

Ryuzaki held the door open for her as she got in with him sliding in beside her.

"Don't be alone with him." He said as soon as the car took off. Misa looked at him incredulously.

"What? Why?"

"There's something about him I don't like."

She rolled her eyes. "Well I'm not going to be rude to him. He's the CEO's son!"

"At the very least he's going to be taking over an agency that's been complicit in disregarding the safety of their employees, I don't trust him."

She thought of how kind Light had been to not only her, but everyone on set. The general feeling he gave off was more helpful school-boy not nefarious overlord. She just couldn't imagine him being as bad as the other men in charge at Facade. In fact, she actively looked forward to the day he took over.

She pouted, "If you're jealous just say so."

"I'm not jealous." He said dismissively. "More importantly we need to discuss how you're going to handle that meet and greet. I'm assuming you won't want to cancel it?"

"No way! Just because I have one creepy guy after me doesn't mean they all are. I love my fans."

"Then your security will need to be stepped up. My team will be watching, but you should know it's likely your stalker will be there as well."

"Fine."

She sat quietly with him in the back seat feeing out of sorts. His mood was so much more upbeat earlier. She picked at her nails, wondering idly if he actually was jealous of Light. The thought gave her some pleasure, and a wicked part of her wanted to exploit it if she could...but it was more likely he just didn't trust anyone working at Facade. She couldn't exactly blame him. How had she not known about years of models going missing? And now it seemed that the same man was after her.

"Ryuzaki," she said after a while, "Are you sure you'll be able to catch this guy? He got away with it before."

"He didn't have me looking for him before."

There was that confidence again. Something about it made her unable to sit still, stirring up a sort of agitation inside of her.

"Did I let you down the first time I helped you?" He asked pointedly.

"Of course not." She muttered, poking at a hole in her fishnets.

"And I won't this time either. Just do what I tell you to do and you'll be safe."

She felt a twinge irritation. "Fine, but when I text, could you at least text me back? I get you're busy, but it's been a whole week and you ignored all of my texts! I'm kind of sick of being left in the dark over here!"

He blinked at her as she continued ranting, “Another thing: you could have at least told me I had a meeting with the CEO today, look at me!" She waved a hand over her provocative outfit. "I can't believe I met him wearing this!"

His dark eyes traveled along the length of her body before saying matter of factly: "You look beautiful as usual I see no problem here."

That blew the wind from her sails. _As usual?_ How could he say that so casually? She felt her cheeks reddening.

"You think I'm beautiful?" She asked in a hushed voice.

His mouth opened and closed for a moment as if on the verge of saying something, but decided better of it. Instead he responded, "You're a model, Misa, I'm sure you're told that on a regular basis."

"Yeah, but It's different when _you_ say it." She said softly, unable to look anywhere except her knees. Her heart drummed in her chest.

"I don't see how-"

Watari cleared his throat from the front seat. They had arrived at her apartment and she didn't even notice.

"Ah! Thank you for the ride Watari!" She scrambled for her purse and struggled for a moment to get the door unlocked and opened in her flustered state. As she got out Ryuzaki rolled the window down to speak to her.

"We'll stay here until you're inside safe and-"

He paused, seemingly searching for the words. "I will...do my best to respond a little quicker to your messages from now on."

She smiled softly, "Thank you."

She looked back to see him rolling the window up again. As she unlocked the door and came inside, Naomi was waiting there, surprised to see her.

"I didn't know you had a ride back I was just about to call-are you alright?"

Misa glided past Naomi over the couch to bury her face in a velvet throw pillow. When she spoke her voice was muffled.

"He thinks I'm beautiful."

* * *

Some people, L knew from experience, were more untrustworthy than others. Human beings were the amalgamation of countless ideologies and upbringing. Nature and nurture. He learned from a young age not to judge the wrappings a person came in; often they obfuscated the truth. But the young man in front of him set off every alarm in L's mind. A vital essence inside of him was missing; instead something darkly sinister and calculating peeked out from behind his eyes. It was there for only a moment, before he blinked and a friendly smile graced his handsome face.

Some foreign and deeply possessive creature reared its head inside of L, urging him to act. He placed a hand on the small of Misa's back, the other lightly on her shoulder to move her around himself and closer to Watari's car. His eyes glanced over to Lights to gauge his reaction, unsurprised to see a flicker of annoyance flash across them.

Long after the encounter he was left to ponder if her stalker felt the same type of bizarre possessiveness over Misa that he was struck with and if so, what made L any different?

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 down! So I work full time and I'll be taking classes on top of that starting next week, but if all goes well my posting schedule should still be fairly consistent. I've been making sure to set aside time for writing lately because it's my stress reliever in these ~trying times~. I've been obsessed with this pairing since 2008 and all it took for me to finally write about them was a pandemic, who knew?
> 
> As always, thank you for the feedback you're leaving me! I'm posting this on FF and AO3 so wherever you decide read it and comment I appreciate it so much, it means the world to me.


	5. The Liar

__

_  
If you don't get too close to people you can't disappoint them,_

_which would be so much worse_

_than letting them disappoint you._

_-Stephanie Burt, Advice from the Lights_

* * *

_He hovers over her, his pale hand sliding down between them agonizingly slow, across the plane of her bare stomach, knuckles catching on the waistband of her panties before slipping in entirely. She bucks her hips pitifully against him seeking more contact, more pressure-just more. She can't look him in the eye, can't stop the breathy panting that escapes her parted lips, but she watches his hand with rapt attention, expectation building, coiling low in her belly. His long fingers dip into her wetness, swirling around, eliciting another desperate whimper. He pulls it back up, forcing her to meet his dark eyes as he holds the glistening digit to his mouth giving it a slow, deliberate lick._

She awoke that morning panting and flushed, trying to suppress the mortification that crept over her. It wasn't her first dream like that, but certainly the first Ryuzaki was the star of. She clamped her legs shut and rolled over in bed, despite her embarrassment hoping to quickly fall back asleep and continue, until her alarm went off not a minute later. No time to rationalize it or even take care of the ache she felt keenly between her thighs.

After a day of photo shoots and meetings, Misa now sat somewhat awkwardly at the enormous dining table in Ryuzaki's penthouse. Like everything else he owned it was oddly ostentatious. It paralleled the floor to ceiling windows which were nearly opaque due to fog. An elaborate gold chandelier hung above it, glinting dully in the muted light. An image of him sitting down at it every evening to dive into a 3 course meal consisting solely of cake and ice cream entered her mind. She'd try to tease him about it if he wasn't in such a foul mood.

To Ryuzaki's displeasure, Light insisted on being put in charge of organizing Misa's meet and greet, leaving her in the delicate position of juggling between the two. Under strict orders to not be alone with him, Ryuzaki insisted on meetings pertaining to the meet and greet take place in his penthouse under his watchful eye.

"It'll be a handshake event." Light explained as he pointed a chart on the table. "Those garner a good turnout especially for you, Misa. It'll be in Ikebukuro, at Sunshine City. Its a popular place to shop so it'll give fans the chance to purchase your latest single as well."

"A handshake event when she has a stalker?" Ryuzaki quipped from the head of the table. He sat behind a laptop sipping on his coffee. His end of the table was laden with colorful sweets and bright bowls of chopped fruits that contrasted wildly with his serious expression.

Light smiled reassuringly. "I have no doubt the extra security your team will provide along our own will be more than enough. And as I said, I will be there personally to watch over her."

"What do these events usually entail?" Ryuzaki asked watching Light carefully.

"A quick hello, a handshake and sometimes they'll leave gifts." Light said. "It's a good opportunity to connect with fans on a more intimate level."

"Which is exactly what her stalker will be thinking."

Misa shot Ryuzaki a reproachful look. Light was being extremely patient with them planning the whole event around her security. She was shocked he even agreed to have the meeting at Ryuzaki's home considering how coldly he treated Light when they met.

Light hesitated. "Speaking of that. I was curious as to how your investigation into the missing models is going?"

"Classified." Ryuzaki replied, now hunched over the laptop, typing again as he spoke. "Conflict of interest. You work there, you understand."

Light considered this. "True. It's just, I'm going to be taking over the company this year. I want to be as transparent and cooperative as possible with your investigation."

Ryuzaki's round eyes surveyed Light suspiciously over the computer. "I'll be interviewing more employees there as soon as Miss Amane's event finishes. I'm sure you and I will no doubt meet then to discuss it."

"I look forward to it. Well, I think that's everything." He turned to Misa, "If you have any questions just give me a call. I'll be there early Friday to help set up and show you where you'll be. I'll of course send that information your way as well." He added respectfully to Ryuzaki.

Ryuzaki grunted, lost in his work again. Though, personally, she doubted he was 100% absorbed.

"Thank you so much for your help with everything. I know it's kind of weird to do it this way."

Light gathered his notes, sticking them into the messenger bag he brought. He gave her a small smile. "I understand your safety is top priority right now. Plus it was...interesting."

She walked him to the elevator, ignoring Ryuzaki's eyes which she could feel follow the two of them.

"Sorry you had to come all the way here to talk about this."

"It's not a problem. Besides, I'll take any excuse to spend a little extra time with you."

She blushed as he pressed the elevator button. He looked over her shoulder and then added quietly. "Maybe after this all settles down we can spend some more time together, alone."

"With how the agency is-" She began.

Light shook his head. "I can change any outdated rules about dating when I take over. In fact, I'll make sure it's the first thing I do." He held the doors of the elevator hesitating a moment. "You're often alone with Ryuzaki aren't you?"

She was slightly taken aback. "Yeah, but he's just helping me, it's not like anything else would ever happen." However, her thoughts strayed back to her dream, where she wished more _had_ happened with the detective. She mentally shoved those thoughts aside to focus.

Light paused giving her one of his dazzling smiles. "I'm glad, because I can get pretty jealous."

She wasn't sure how to respond. While his confidence was charming, she felt conflicted by his attention. There wasn't much she felt she could do about it. She settled for nodding shyly as the doors slid shut.

She sighed heading back to the dining area calling out. "Well, he's gone are you happy?"

"Over the moon." Ryuzaki replied blandly.

She watched as he dipped a lazy finger into the half melted ice cream beside him to lick it off, his eyes not moving from his work. Her thoughts immediately dove right back into the gutter, causing a rush of heat to sweep through her.

 _I'm giving him too much credit_. She thought firmly. _He's probably a virgin. He's too weird to have ever- wait, why not just ask him?_

"Have you ever had a girlfriend before?" Misa asked innocently, now meandering slowly along side the table.

Without looking up he asked. "How do you define 'girlfriend'?"

She thought for a moment. _How else?_

"You know, you like a girl, she likes you. You go on dates, buy her flowers, take her home..." She trailed off suggestively, watching him closely.

He rubbed a thumb pensively across his chin. "I've never bought a woman flowers, but yes I suppose by your definition I've had them."

She made a face. Why was she not surprised he'd never bought a girl flowers? Well, that settled it then. He probably wasn't a virgin if he'd had more than one. Still, that didn't justify her brain unconsciously imagining him like _that_. Especially since he seemed to have so little interest in her.

She hadn't tried flirting with him since they first met up weeks ago, mostly because there would be something tangible behind It now. It would probably mess up her whole routine if she tried it on him again and end up saying something she regretted. Plus, what if it scared him away? He was nice enough, bought her music, agreed to help her for free...What if he viewed her as a younger sister? _Uhg! No way!_ She thought fervently. _Anything but that._

 _"_ If you're looking for romantic dating advice I'm afraid I won't be of much help."

She snorted. "Yeah I figured as much."

"I was wondering though," Ryuzaki began, looking up at Misa, his face serious. "Are you feeling prepared for this event?"

She looked at him in surprise. "Yeah, of course, why?"

"You haven't interacted with the public since you began receiving the threatening messages. I just wanted to make sure you're mentally able to handle tomorrow."

She smiled, scrunching her nose. "Are you worried you won't be able to keep me safe?"

"No, I'm confident now that he at least won't be one of the visitors it's just..." He paused, his eyes searching the air in front of him. She tilted her head in question, but he shook his head. "It's nothing. You're free to go home, I'll have Watari drive you back."

On the ride home she thought about his strange behavior. His abrupt change in mood made no sense, but then again he often confused her. She knew so little about him. She made a tally in her mind of everything she did know. _He's really smart, he catches bad guys, he's loaded, he likes sweets, he's really cute when he licks his fingers-nope that one isn't helpful._

* * *

Misa awoke early the morning of her meet and greet, the excitement keeping her from sleeping any longer. Meet and greets were some of her favorite events to do. Despite the stereotypes surrounding the people who went to them, her fans were always sweet to her. Her apartment walls had more than a few fan letters and gifts she'd received over the years lovingly tacked up. She always treasured those interactions. True, she was a little nervous about the idea of her stalker showing up, but if Ryuzaki was confident he could keep him away she'd trust him.

She twisted and turned, admiring her reflection in the dressing room mirror. She arrived at the mall two hours early in order to get ready. She wore a short black pleated dress with long ruched, see-through sleeves that flared out at the wrist. She wore her golden hair loose, with soft waves and dusted silver glitter along her bare collar bone and shoulders so that she sparkled in the light, making her look ethereal.

"Are you decent Misa?"

Ryuzaki called from outside the door. She tottered over in her platform heels to open it with a flourish.

"Don't you get any sleep?" She asked, noticing his tired eyes, the dark bags underneath more pronounced than usual.

"I need less sleep than most people." He replied. As he said it he carried an enormous frozen coffee complete with whipped cream and caramel drizzle. She eyed him doubtfully.

He pointed at the drink. "Don't misunderstand, I get this for the sugar content, not the caffeine."

She rolled her eyes. "Yeah like that's any better."

She waited for him to comment on her outfit, hoping maybe he'd call her beautiful again, but he simply walked past her and set his laptop down on the small table set up in the room. She sighed thinking she'd better savor the one compliment he ever gave her, because It was unlikely to happen again any time soon.

"I should let you know now, there's been a slight change in plans. I have someone else detailing you today."

"Who?" Misa asked. "Not Aizawa?"

"Aizawa's wife unexpectedly went into labor early today." He paused. "We do have another detective on standby for this event, but..."

Misa was puzzled by Ryuzaki's somewhat pained expression as he sighed. "Matsuda."

The man in question entered after a timid knock, a look of reverent awe on his innocent face. Oh, she knew that look.

"Misa-Misa!" He breathed, words now tumbling out of his mouth. "I'm a big fan! I buy every magazine you're in and I got your latest single today! I actually met you at a handshake event you held last year in Akihabara, but I bet you don't remember me do you?"

He looked so hopeful and sad, like a lost puppy dog. She couldn't just crush his dreams.

"Ah, I meet so many people, but hmm lemme see." She slowly circled him, looking him up and down carefully, causing his face to go red. "Now that I get a good look at you, you really do seem familiar!"

"Really?" He said excitedly.

"Yeah! When you came in I could have swore we met before." She said brightly.

Ryuzaki could not have looked any more bored or disbelieving of Misa.

"You should take this assignment seriously, Matsuda."

"Of course!" He said and he turned dramatically to Misa, putting a hand over his heart. "I would take a bullet for you if I needed to."

"Oh, but think of your wife!" She exclaimed.

Matsuda scratched the back of his head, embarrassed. "I'm actually not married like Aizawa, I don't even have a girlfriend."

Misa couldn't resist. She leaned in close and looked up at him through her lashes, her eyes swishing from his chest to his face. "So that means Matsuda is single then?"

Matsuda went tomato red, unable to speak as he nodded vigorously. Ryuzaki rolled his eyes from behind him. "Quit messing with him please."

Ryuzaki pulled up a map of the mall on the laptop he brought. He pointed at one corner where a rectangle representing her meeting table would be.

"You'll greet fans here, there's an exit right next to it behind a curtain. Matsuda will be beside you during the whole event. If you feel unsafe, tell him."

"Where will you be?" She asked frowning. It seemed out of character for him to be too far.

"I'll be nearby. There's no point in both of us being there."

"And what about Light?" She asked skeptically. "I'm surprised you're letting him help after what you said about him."

Ryuzaki sucked on his coffee, speaking with the straw still in his mouth. "Well, what better opportunity to keep watch over him. Plus, I don't exactly have the authority to tell him not to be there. Yet."

"He's really nice you know. He even said he wants to help you investigate!"

"Regardless, I'll be watching. I have to go set up. Matsuda will escort you out soon." Ryuzaki snapped the computer shut, heading out the dressing room. She watched him leave feeling slightly disgruntled. _He could have at least told me I looked pretty!_

She turned to Matsuda who was staring openly at her, his mouth slightly ajar. She giggled and he turned away quickly. _Well, at least I know I can affect normal_ _men._

The phone from beside her makeup stand began to ring.

"Ah that might be my friend Naomi!" She said over her shoulder, "Could you excuse me for a sec Matsuda?"

Matsuda nodded eagerly, smiling. "I'll be right outside the door, just call me if you need me."

She picked up the phone and answered cheerfully. "Misa-Misa here!"

"Hello Misa."

"Who is this?"

"Your number one fan of course. Do you like the roses I sent?"

The radiant smile slipped from her face and she felt her blood run cold. The voice was unrecognizable, distorted, and deep, like he was speaking through a machine. Her heart beat rapidly, pounding against her rib cage.

"Speechless, Misa?" He chuckled, "I like that I can have that affect on you. You often take my breath away as well."

She felt panic clawing its way up her throat. She looked at the door where outside it, Matsuda stood. If she could get to him and tell him-

But seeming to read her mind the man spoke up. "Don't go trying to get the nice agents attention, Misa. Let's just you and I talk for a moment."

"What do you want." She breathed. She felt her knees go weak as she slid to the floor.

"I just wanted to wish you good luck at your meet and greet today. I can't wait to shake your hand. It's so hard to resist touching you, but I'm happy to pay for the privilege today."

"I have people here watching me." She whispered, her entire body trembled as she spoke. "A lot of people. Ryuzaki will find you before you get near me."

At this, the voice on the other end of the phone cackled, " _Ryuzaki?_ Is that what he told you his name was?" He now spoke in a lower tone, seemingly caressing the last few words, "I'll do you a favor here, Misa and let you know now: he's _lying_ to you."

Through the waves of sickening fear she felt confusion wash over her. "What're you talking about?"

"I worried you'd get the wrong idea about your detective, but If you don't believe me just ask your friend Miss Misora, she'll know all about it."

But Naomi hadn't met Ryuzaki yet, she planned on introducing them after the meet and greet. Her voice sounded faint as she spoke.

"You're lying."

He chuckled again. "Maybe it's best for you to find out the hard way. That way you'll see which one of us actually has your best interests in mind."

"He wouldn't lie to me." She said, her weak voice growing stronger, "He's going to find out and when he does-"

"You know I'm close." He hissed, "Keep this conversation between the two of us unless you want your agent hurt. I can see him now, his name is Matsuda isn't it? Do you want to be responsible for that?"

"Okay I won't!" She said shrilly. "I won't tell him! I wont tell anyone, just don't hurt anybody."

"Then, I'll see you soon Misa-Misa."

The call ended. She gasped in lung-fulls of air as she dropped the phone. Looking at the clock, she had less than five minutes to pull herself together. She scrambled off the floor to the mirror to check her makeup. With trembling hands she quickly reapplied her eyeliner as best she could, wiping the dark smudges from beneath her eyes. She smoothed her hands over her ponytails and hoped her flushed cheeks would be taken as blush, her terror as excitement. _It's fine, just push it down._ She thought firmly. _Just ignore it!_

A knock at the door nearly made her jump out of her skin. Matsuda called through it.

"Misa, it's almost time I have to escort you down there soon."

"O-okay one sec!" She called out, trying to disguise the creakiness in her voice. _I can do this. I have to do this._ She opened the door and Matsuda grinned at her. "Ready?"

For a split second she considered telling him what had happened, but his smiling face made her falter. She didn't know what the stalker was capable of and she couldn't put Matsuda in danger like that.

"I'm ready." She said weakly.

"Are you alright?" He asked looking worried, "Do you want me to tell them you need more time?"

"No!" She said quickly. "No I'm...just nervous. It's been a while since I've done a handshake event."

"I see." Matsuda said smiling again as they walked down the hall. "So even idols get nervous to meet their own fans. That's kind of sweet!" He babbled on, but his words became muffled white noise in her ears. Every unsteady step forward took her closer to where her stalker waited.

As Matsuda held back the curtain for her to enter Misa quickly put on the most convincing smile she could and stepped out into the light.

* * *

L watched from the control room as she made it to the table.

"She seems to be doing fine." Watari commented, though his brow was creased. "So far at least."

Like him, Watari worried how Misa would handle the event. L wasn't one for being superstitious, but he had a looming feeling of dread that hung over him like a dark cloud. He spent the last few days checking and rechecking every last detail of her security, but something about the whole event made him antsy. Despite her assurances that she was ready to be in the public eye, he felt restless. He tapped his foot in an anxious rhythm, biting his thumb nail as his eyes darted from screen to screen, keeping a close eye on her movements.

For a while it seemed to go smoothly. Every fan who approached her was behaving. It helped that Ryuzaki had made sure to have everyone who bought tickets scanned before they entered. Most didn't even mind the bag searches. Anything for _Misa-Misa._

But something was wrong. He could sense it, he could see it, even through the screen. He scrutinized her face. Her eyes darted around the room in worry. No, not worry: fear. Pure terror seemed to have gripped a hold of her.

"Something isn't right." L said quietly. Watari leaned forward with him to watch the screen. "Call her friend, the one she's been spending time with. She might help calm her down some."

As more fans approached she seemed even jumpier. Her body language apprehensive and stiff. As one fan approached she fell backwards against the wall, shielding herself with her hands. She turned to Light, saying something, grabbing a hold of him and pointing at the man on the other side of the table.

L felt a thrill of foreboding shoot through him and jumped up. "She won't make it to the end of this."

* * *

"Misa are you alright?" Light murmured, he reached a hand out to her shoulder. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

She could barely focus on him as she echoed what she told Matsuda earlier. "Yes, I'm just a little nervous."

Groups of fans came and went, some leaving gifts and letters which she did her best to accept graciously. As time went on, however, the more hands she shook the more paranoid she became. Which one was he? Had they already met? Was he watching her now? She felt herself breaking into a cold sweat. Faces blurred into one another.

A man approached appearing to be in his early 20's carrying a large blue backpack. He stammered out a polite greeting and held out a gift for her. She smiled at him until she noticed what was in his hand: a single red rose.

She let out huff of air, terror seizing her as she stumbled backwards against the wall. Matsuda and Light both rushed to her side in concern.

"Misa?"

"Don't let him near me." She gasped, pointing at the man. "He's going to hurt me!"

Matsuda looked back at the fan who looked hurt as he replied timidly, "It's just a flower for Misa-Misa I don't understand what's going-"

"That's what you want me to think!" She screamed, now absolutely inconsolable. She felt suffocated by the amount of people around her, everything was too bright, too loud. She looked up at Light, pleading with him: "Please, get me out of here, he's going to hurt me-"

Misa felt a hand wrap around her wrist and tug her back through the curtain she came out of earlier. She looked up to see Ryuzaki leading her back to the dressing room.

"Ryuzaki!" She pleaded, trying to pull him back. "It's him! He's here- that was him!"

"It wasn't him." He said quietly as he opened the door and directed her to the dressing room couch. She kept trying to pull him back, shaking her head insistently as she stuttered through her words. "It was! He had a rose! He-It was him you need to go stop him!"

Ryuzaki put his hands firmly on her shoulders forcing her to sit down as he knelt before her, his hands flanking the sides of her knees on the couch.

"Misa," He said carefully, "Every person who came today had to buy tickets a week in advance. I made sure to look into the background every single one. It's not him."

Misa still shook her head, her mouth trembling.

"What happened?"

Matsuda had come flying through the door looking worried. Ryuzaki held up a hand to keep him quiet.

"He-he called me." She stuttered. "Before the meet and greet. He called me and said he'd be here, he said he wanted to _touch_ me." She shuddered, her shoulders heaving as she sobbed into her hands.

"Did you know about this?" Ryuzaki asked Matsuda sharply.

Matsuda paled, responding quickly. "No! I swear I had no idea."

They both looked back at Misa.

Her voice quavered. "He said he'd hurt Matsuda if I told anyone."

Ryuzaki bowed his head in frustration as he gripped the sides of the couch with white knuckled fists. "Misa, that is his job. I hired him to protect you."

"He's right." Matsuda said kindly. "I can take care of myself, don't worry about me getting hurt."

"But-but he said-"

"He lied." Ryuzaki said, lifting his head. "He lied, like he always does, to control you."

Light poked his head into the room looking concerned. "They're asking if she's going to come back out is everything alright?"

"She's in no condition to continue. Cancel the rest and refund her fans. Tell them she got sick." He jerked his head at Matsuda. "Go with Light. Help him explain."

As Light shut the door, Ryuzaki held Matsuda back. "Keep a close eye on him." Matsuda nodded and left.

Misa couldn't make sense of it. Did he lie? How did he know Matsuda's name? Where she was? She couldn't keep her jumbled thoughts together.

"Where were you?" She whispered through her tears. "How did you get there so fast?"

"I was watching from the surveillance room. I told you I wouldn't be far."

His tone was brusque. She looked up at him, her bottom lip quivering. Even though he was quiet and hadn't raised his voice, she could tell he was angry with her.

"I need you to be honest with me." He said tersely. "At all times. If he calls you, tell me. If he threatens you, tell me. Otherwise, I can't help you."

 _Be honest. Be honest._ The words echoed strangely in her head. Why was that important? The door opened again, but this time it was Naomi who walked in uncertainly.

"Misa, are you alright? I got a call-"

She halted, her eyes hooked on to Ryuzaki in shock, who looked back at her with a strange sort of resignation on his tired face.

"L?"

Misa looked between the two of them confused. "What did you call him? This is Ryuzaki."

But an internal shift had already begun to take place. She stared at Ryuzaki, suddenly remembering what her stalker told her over the phone, what she had vehemently denied to him and to herself.

_He's lying to you._

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) 
> 
> Hope everyone is staying safe!


	6. The First Move

_  
  
And you will meet people_

_who are safer loved_

_from a distance_

_and dangerous to love up close._

_Like the flames_

_you loved as a child._

_Like the fire_

_that taught you pain._

_Nikita Gill, Flame Truths_

* * *

Misa lay on her couch staring at the ceiling, her phone lit up occasionally from beside her, briefly brightening the dark room before slowly dimming, over and over again. She watched the shadows grow and fade as it did, making monsters out of the shapes in her mind. She'd long stopped checking the notifications, she knew what they'd say.

Her entire breakdown had been caught on cell phone video and uploaded online almost immediately. Multiple angles showed Misa stumbling backwards in terror, screeching at an innocent fan and then being taken away.

The fan she snubbed was interviewed: he just wanted to support his favorite idol. Sympathy poured in for him. Online gossip blogs were flooded with comments about her behavior.

_"She only treated him like that because he wasn't good-looking, she's so superficial!"_

_"Why act so bitchy? Is she on drugs now?"_

_"She's not even that hot she's getting old anyway."_

Crazy. Over dramatic. Many speculated on whether or not she had been drinking and if she'd check into a private rehab soon.

The upside, if there was any, was that with all the hate mail and cruel comments she received, she couldn't tell who was her stalker and who wasn't. And she wasn't in the mood to weed through them all to find out.

She hadn't been called in for work in a few days and didn't expect to any time soon. Her agency was in damage control mode. So far their only method of taming the blaze was blaming her behavior on being overworked and that she was taking an "extended break for her health". Because of course, they wouldn't want the truth out there.

She felt completely alone. It was the type of all encompassing isolation that crept deep inside of her, to the bone, leaving her body feeling hollow. She was no stranger to that particular strain of misery. It brought her painfully back to the day her parents died, when she realized just how alone she was in the world.

For days she had little drive to do much beyond laying on her couch, every now and then she'd read a message board or two to torture herself and then go back to her lethargic moping. She wore the same oversized, holey T-shirt for the last 3 days, her hair was stuffed into a half-unraveled messy bun that would be a pain to detangle later. Nothing about her was up to her usual standards, she didn't have the energy to care.

She argued with herself on what happened that day. Maybe she did overreact, but how would anyone else have respond to that situation? She had been too overwhelmed to think clearly. The phone call. The rose. The months of messages, pictures...It was too much.

And then there was what happened afterwords.

_"L, I didn't realize..." Naomi began to say, but Misa tuned her out, her eyes dead set on Ryuzaki._

_"Why did she call you that?" Misa asked, as she did, she took an unconscious step backwards. "Do you know each other?"_

_Naomi looked down and away. Ryuzaki shifted uncomfortably._

_She looked between the two of them and it made sense, clicking together in a glaringly obvious way. Oh._

_"We were...partners when I worked overseas." Naomi explained._

_But that wasn't it, not entirely. She could feel the tension, the atmosphere was thick and suddenly she didn't want to be there anymore. She wanted to be as far away from him as possible._

_"I want to go home." She said quietly. "I'm really tired."_

_Ryuzaki dug for his phone. "I'll have Watari-"_

_"No." She said firmly, standing and grabbing for her purse, keeping her gaze averted from his. "I'll take a taxi or something."_

_"I can take her." Light said. She turned to see him standing in the doorway, leaning against the frame, looking like an angel of mercy._

_"Sounds good." She said quickly, heading past him out the door. "Let's go."_

_She didn't need to turn to see Ryuzaki's face to know that he would be angry. She wanted to make him mad. She felt hurt and stupid and it made her feel a tiny bit better knowing he'd be angrier with her. She didn't care._

_She barely remembered the ride home with Light. He pulled his fancy little sports car to the back of the mall and she hopped in. Normally she might be impressed by it since it looked expensive, but that day she just felt grateful for the quick escape._

_"If you ever need someone to talk to," He commented after a while, "I'm more than happy to listen." She leaned her head against the window, closing her eyes for a moment._

_"I can't believe you're being so nice to me after how I acted today."_

_"What can I say, I'm a really great guy."_

_A reluctant smile tugged at her lips. She'd give him that much. She felt humiliated by how she behaved, how she tried begging him to take her away._

_"Are you mad at that detective?" He asked curiously. She went very still in her seat, holding her breath. He must have sensed her unease, because he quickly spoke up again._

_"Sorry!" He said putting a hand up, his eyes still concentrated on the road ahead. "It wasn't my place to ask."_

_She sighed. "No, it's fine. I am mad at him, but it's a long story. It's stupid. He lied about something that's probably really small to him, but to me it's a big deal. I don't know why."_

_"Can I give you some insight...on men?" He offered._

_"Oh...uh, sure."_

_He pulled in front of her apartment building. He took his time parking before turning to her, choosing his words carefully._

_"I try to make it a point not to tell lies that will hurt others, but not everyone is like that. If he's lying to you about something small, then he's probably lying to you about something bigger too."_

So what else was he hiding then? Would she ever find out? Everything about him was shrouded in mystery. Even when she first spoke to him at seventeen, her innocent questions about his life were always answered vaguely or straight up ignored.

_"Where are you from Ryuzaki?"_

_"It's not important."_

Because even back then, she wanted him to let her inside.

Maybe she just had to deal with the idea that she had built him up inside of her to be something he wasn't. She idealized him from the moment he put the man who murdered her parents behind bars. She had years to reflect upon that life-changing act. She got swept up in his unexpected kindness, because over the years no one just gavethat to her without expecting something in return. She felt equal parts betrayed and ridiculous for feeling betrayed. He was exactly as he advertised himself, she was the one who had false expectations of him. So course he'd have secrets. She just thought after all this time and with the way he started treating her now, maybe she could be someone he considered worth letting in.

Her doorbell went off. She rolled off her couch, slipping into her fluffy slippers to check the camera. Naomi stood outside in her burgundy leather jacket, holding a small plastic bag.

Misa unlocked and opened the door, stepping back to let her by.

"I bet you haven't eaten today." Naomi said, setting the bag on her counter. "I made curry tonight I thought you might like some."

"Thank you." Misa said softly. She went back to the couch to sit down. She hadn't really spoken to Naomi since that day either. She sensed her friend may have been trying to give her some space.

Naomi sat on the couch facing her. Misa couldn't quite meet her face beyond seeing the concern that was etched into it for a split second before looking back at her lap.

"I know you might be angry with me-" Naomi began but Misa interrupted.

"Why would I be angry with you?"

"Oh Misa, if I had known he was your detective."

Misa shook her head. "I mean it, I'm not mad at you. I love you. I know if you had known you would have told me."

They sat in silence. She had so many questions she wanted to ask.

"So you guys...you were..." She struggled for the words.

"We worked on a serial murder case together in the US around 4 years ago. That's how I met him." Naomi responded promptly.

"But you also..."

Naomi took a deep breath and nodded.

"For a short time. It wasn't anything serious." She said firmly. "And I had no idea he was in Japan at all. To be honest, I haven't heard from him since I left the US years ago."

The idea that they had ever been anything made her feel small. Even so, she couldn't help but feel annoyed by his behavior on Naomi's behalf.

"He never called to see how you were? What an ass."

"As I said, it wasn't a particularly _meaningful_ fling."

"Still..." Misa grumbled. She tugged on the hem of her oversized shirt, fidgeting. She felt agitation bubbling up inside of her.

"And his name?"

"He uses aliases depending on where he's working. I knew him as L only because I had to work closely with him. His full name is classified, I believe only a small handful of people know."

"I knew he couldn't tell me his full name." Misa mumbled, "I know what his jobs' like. I just assumed he'd tell me eventually. Learning that even that was a lie just made me feel like maybe I don't know anything about him at all. And that's probably how he wants it to be."

Naomi nodded solemnly. "He is notoriously secretive."

Misa felt the burning behind her eyes before the warmth of her tears began to brim over her eyelashes.

"Misa what's wro-"

"You're so mature!" She blurted out. Naomi inclined her head in question. Misa blushed as she stuttered on.

"I mean, you're just so much more mature than I am. You're refined and elegant. You're smarter than I am too. You have stuff in common, you were even his partner! I always wondered what his type was and now I just feel like..."

Her downtrodden tone puttered out. Naomi smiled kindly at her. "So you really like him then?"

Misa wiped at her tears furiously with the back of her hand.

"No." She said stubbornly, "He's a jerk, why would I? I don't care what his type is, forget I said that."

She felt ridiculous confessing her insecurities. She didn't even fully realize it bothered her until Naomi showed up. She genuinely loved and cared for her, but she hated the feeling of inferiority that swelled up inside of her when she compared herself to her friend.

Naomi pursed her lips, suppressing a smile. "Misa...L, as I'm sure you've noticed, craves sweets doesn't he?"

Misa nodded, feeling foolish, keeping her eyes trained on her fluffy slippers as Naomi continued.

"He craves sweetness and sugar above all else. He doesn't care for more, as you would put it, 'elegant and refined' flavors like say, seafood or caviar. He likes what he likes. We all have our tastes and I would say that you're the sweetest."

Misa looked up with tears now falling freely down her face. "I'm sorry Naomi I don't know why I'm like this."

Naomi shook her head, "It's alright. There was a very short time we were together it's true, but it didn't work out for a reason. I'm glad it didn't."

Misa sniffed, feeling her appetite returning to her. She got up to poke around the bag Naomi brought in. Inside there were several small containers of curry, vegetables, and fluffy steamed rice.

"Uhg, you're beautiful, smart, _and_ you can cook?" Misa groaned as she stuck a fork into the first container, not even bothering to heat it up. "Ryuzaki really is an idiot for letting you go."

It was easier to joke about now that they had talked about it. Naomi shook her head smiling, "Like I said, I think you may be more compatible."

"Sure, in 10 years maybe he'll let me know when his birthday is." She then looked up expectantly at Naomi.

"October 31st-but I only know that because of paperwork."

"Creepy Halloween perfect for him." She mumbled again, stabbing aggressively at a piece of carrot, ignoring the fact that she always enjoyed the holiday, and thought it was kind of fitting that he was born on a day people hid behind masks and ate candy.

Naomi came around the counter cleaning up the clutter and mess that had accumulated over the past week of Misa's depression, tossing instant ramen packs into the trash and empty water bottles into recycling. "I don't know if it's my place to give you any advice..."

"Please!" Misa interrupted eagerly, "I'll take it!"

"Well, if you're looking to move forward with him, you may need to make the first move. He's quite practical and analytical. It's what makes him a great detective, but a terrible romantic partner."

Misa bit her lip, "You don't think it's too soon?"

"Well, as long as you don't attack him I'm sure it's fine. Just talk to him, let him know how you feel."

Misa had never been one to pursue in romantic relationships. In fact, a problem she faced now was being pursued by the wrong type of man. But even before that she never went after men, they went after her. That's just the way it was. Not that the idea repelled her; on the contrary, she'd been toying with the idea of making a move on him. Maybe this was the push she needed. Though, she was still angry with him. She'd probably have to overcome that hurdle first.

But something suddenly occurred to her.

"You said that only a few people know his name is L right?"

"Yes, why?"

"My stalker, when he called me that day, he laughed when I said Ryuzaki's name. He said he was lying to me. Do you think that means he knows?"

Naomi paused, her hands hovering over a bowl she was cleaning in the sink. "Have you told L this?"

Misa shook her head. "I haven't spoken to him all week."

Naomi grabbed a dish towel, drying her hands quickly. "Get dressed. I'm taking you to see him then."

Misa looked scandalized. "I haven't-no I look horrible!"

Naomi rolled her eyes. "Then get dressed. This is something he should know."

A whirlwind of quickly showering, brushing her teeth, tearing a comb through her hair and tossing on the first clean outfit she could find landed her an hour later standing nervously outside of his apartment building. She couldn't even give the excuse that it was too late: they both knew he'd be awake.

"I called him." Naomi said from her car. "He gave the go-ahead to his doorman. You can head on up."

She begged Naomi to come in with her. Despite their obvious romantic history together, Misa felt she needed the moral support, but Naomi declined.

"Tell him what your stalker said. And what happens after that..." She grinned at Misa as she rolled up her window and drove away. Misa scowled.

On the elevator ride up she smoothed the wrinkles out of the plain black T-shirt dress she wore. The knee high socks and sneakers were the only things she could find that went with it, the result of putting her laundry off for way too long. She looked much simpler than she preferred to be seen and it made her feel self conscious. She'd have preferred to stomp in wearing 6 inch heels and the confidence to match. She also chastised herself for putting black lace lingerie on underneath it all, because it wasn't like _that_ was going to happen. They were just going to talk. _You're still mad at him remember!_

The doors slid open with a soft ping. She bent over to slip off her sneakers as she stepped in, putting on the guest slippers waiting in the entrance. She looked up to see him watching her, his expression impassive.

She swallowed at her nervousness. "Hey."

"Hello."

She scratched her arm looking around for a neutral topic to latch onto. His apartment was dim, almost like she had hers. She could see into his office where his computer illuminated the room.

"I'm not interrupting am I?"

"Not at all. I was just about to take a break."

She walked past him to the living room. "It's so dark in here."

She soon realized why. None of the lights were on, instead all of the curtains were drawn back revealing the twinkling cityscape around them. The balcony door was open letting the cool night breeze in. It was beautiful. If she had this view she'd probably never have the lights on either. _Focus_. She closed her eyes, taking a deep, calming breath.

She turned to face him. _No more small talk. Don't be a coward._

"What am I to you?"

Without giving him a chance to answer she clarified quickly, "It's just, you definitely don't have to help me, but you do. And so that makes me think I'm...a friend? Something? But then you don't even tell me your real name?What's with you?"

He stayed silent, his lips a thin line on his face. Most distractingly his eyes never wavered from hers. They were black in the dim room and intensely focused. She looked away as she spoke again.

"You said you wanted me to trust you and to be honest with you. I think it's fair I get some honesty in return, don't you?"

He rubbed his thumb across his lower lip in thought. "I suppose so."

"So what am I?" She asked again.

"What do you want to be?"

She looked up confused. He scratched the back of his leg with his other foot, looking away from her.

"I-" She was put on the spot. _What do I want to be..._

"I don't know what you are." He admitted. "What I do know is that there is a dangerous man after you and I want to stop him from hurting you anymore than he already has. Take that to mean whatever you need it to."

She sighed, exasperated. "No, Ryuza-wait, should I even call you that?" She asked frustrated.

"When we're alone I don't care what you call me." Did he know how that sounded? Likely not. It made her heart pound in her chest even more, knocking the determination she had built up out of her.

"Well...okay." She finished lamely. So much for making a move, she didn't even know what she wanted to say.

Instead, she settled for telling him what she told Naomi about the call with her stalker. His face darkened as she explained.

"He said I was lying to you?" Ryuzaki murmured, mostly to himself as he paced around the room. "That explains your reaction afterwords."

She pursed her lips, remembering how she blew him off. Yes, if she wanted to receive the truth from anyone it should have been him, not her stalker. He stopped pacing.

"I will say this: your stalker is more...formidable than I anticipated. I tracked down the fan who offered you the rose. He was given the flower right before the event. He doesn't remember who gave it to him, only that the stranger suggested that it was your favorite."

Misa frowned. "What're you saying?"

"I'm saying I believe he made sure you'd get the flower so you would have precisely that type of reaction. He knew you'd be on edge after the phone call and he wanted to push you over that edge, publicly."

Misa blinked as he continued.

"In short: it's a form of psychological manipulation with the double edged sword of causing harm to your reputation at the same time."

"Did you see what people are saying about me." She asked quietly.

He paused. "I did."

"So it worked." She mumbled faintly. "You see how everyone is treating me right now. They think I'm crazy. I feel like I'm crazy. I'm alone. I'm always alone."

She stood trembling in the middle of the room, tears falling down her face. She hadn't cried all week until that night and now it seemed she was making up for it. She hid her face in her hands, ashamed and wishing she could go be miserable in peace.

She expected him to get frustrated with her, or to send her home as usual, but instead he approached her hesitantly, as if she would run away, his hands reaching for hers. He held them lightly. Through watery eyes she blinked up at him, startled by his gentle touch. His hands were much larger than her own, pale and but surprisingly warmer than the first time she had touched them. His thumb rubbed a small, soothing circle over hers that by contrast sent a rush of electrifying heat she could feel all the way down to her knees.

He swallowed, his eyes not meeting hers.

"I'm not used to being a friend. I don't think I've ever had one before." He murmured in a low tone, continuing his steady circles. "I apologize for not noticing how this has affected you."

She instantly imagined a dozen scenarios at once, all of which ended with them tangled in bed together, those long fingers rubbing tantalizing circles elsewhere. Her breathing hitched; usually these thoughts disturbed her. She'd push them down beneath the surface, where they could simmer away, eventually becoming an errant day dream or nighttime fantasy. But what was the use in pretending now? She wanted him to chase away the misery she felt. She was struck with the overwhelming need to open herself to him completely.

"L," She whispered unsteadily, using his real name for the first time, "What if I don't want to be your friend?"

His thumb stilled and his dark eyes flicked up to meet hers. Confusion and what seemed like hurt, flit across them briefly.

"I apologize." He said, starting to pull away.

"Wait!" She cried out and leaning forward on her tip-toes, she grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him back to her. Their lips slid against each other in a clumsy kiss as she clung to him. He went rigid in shock as she pressed herself against his body. His lips were soft, and vaguely sweet. She parted her own slightly to dip her tongue into his startled mouth, desperate to taste him. His hands that had gripped on to the sides of her shoulders spasmed, briefly pulling her closer, before pushing her away.

She panted slightly, watching him as he stumbled backwards for a moment, hitting the wall behind him with a thump.

"Misa, playing a game like this is-"

"I'm not playing a game." She pleaded softly.

He looked dazed for a moment; the usual cool and unbothered facade crumbling to the ground before her. His eyes were bright, his pale cheeks now flushed with color. His shirt collar was still stretched from where she had clung to him, revealing a flushed collar bone. It was intoxicating seeing him become so disheveled, knowing she had caused that reaction. She wanted to see more.

He licked his lips, his dark eyes darting back down to her mouth and for a wonderful, fleeting moment she wondered if he was about to continue their kiss, but instead the muffled ringing of his phone interrupted.

Misa let out a huff of frustration as he dug the ancient flip phone out of his pocket gratefully and answered.

He turned away from her, his shoulders hunched. "Aizawa."

He paused and without looking over his shoulder said, "I'm with her now. Yes, I'll be right there."

Misa bit her lip as he finished the conversation, the phone snapping shut. He turned back to her.

"Something's happened, I need to go."

"Shouldn't we talk about all this." She whined.

He was already punching in the numbers on the keypad next to the door, slipping into his shoes. "There's no need Misa." He was still slightly out of breath, but quickly regaining his composure. "You're lonely I understand. You may get confused with all of this going on. It's normal to fall prey to your misguided impulses."

Her mouth fell open in disbelief. "I am not confused! I really have feelings for you!"

He turned and faced her. His large eyes cold and black again, "Stay here tonight. Don't open the door for anyone. I'll be back in the morning." The elevator doors slid shut.

She spent the rest of the night furious at both at L and herself. She remembered Naomi's advice, _"Well as long as you don't attack him..."_ So much for that. She practically threw herself at him. But she confessed her feelings too and all she got in return was the same patronizing treatment. _Misguided impulses?_ If he were any other man they would have already been in bed together. She felt distinctly hot and agitated at the thought and knew that part of why she was so drawn to him was because he was so unlike any other man. Still, making a move did nothing. If anything it pushed him further away.

Was she so stupid in his eyes that she'd just throw herself at any man who gave her attention? She paced around his living room, seething.

She looked at her phone where a message from Light was waiting to be answered. In a moment of recklessness, she responded.

_Sure, I'd love to go out with you._

* * *

L caught his breath on the way down, grateful to finally have her eyes off of him. She was worse than any craving for sugar that overtook him. Nothing compared to _that_. To the way it felt when she pressed herself to him, the warmth of her body against his. To the small, almost imperceptible breathy moan that left her lips when her tongue slipped into his mouth. It took every ounce of self control he had to keep himself from picking her up and taking her back into his bedroom where he could finally-no.

He took in another steadying breath. _This is a classic response to stress._ He reasoned. _She views me as a respected authority figure. She's seeking stability, a friend. She said herself she was feeling lonely._

It didn't help that he felt so finely attuned to her presence. He reacted on instinct when he saw her crying, wanting only to soothe the strange stabbing ache inside of him that was triggered by the sight of her tears.

And then for her to turn around and throw herself at him...It sent all the careful rationale he had out the window. He wanted to let her continue, let her have her way with him. He felt a deeply dark desire to let her use him however she wanted. The way _he_ used others in the past...

...But rationality did return, forcing him to push her away. And it reminded him that she wasn't in her right state of mind either. It would have been wrong of him to take advantage of her when she was like that. And besides, they had a history. She was a repeat client. No, that wasn't right. A friend? Not quite. It bothered him that she didn't fit into any box he tried putting her into. She had wiggled her way out into someplace completely new and it worried him.

The only remedy to the madness, he decided, was to catch her stalker quickly, send him to jail and then quietly disappear again. Solve some cases overseas, maybe go back to England. Some distance would help clear his mind and he could slip back into the comfort of who he was before.

Aizawa was waiting for him in the lobby. He spoke urgently as they headed to the car.

"Another Facade model missing. Her roommate hasn't seen her in a week. No sign of exactly when she left, but this was outside her apartment."

He handed L a clear plastic evidence bag, scattered inside were several blood red roses, their stems snapped and broken, petals crushed as if they'd been stomped on. He held it up to eye level examining it closely.

"And Light Yagami," L murmured, "You've kept an eye on him?"

"Matsuda has been keeping watch like you asked. He's made no suspicious moves today." Aizawa frowned. "Do you think it's the same man, the stalker?"

L scrutinized the bag. He was positive it was the same man who was after Misa. He left her roses to send a message. And now, with what Misa told him about the stalker having some knowledge of L, he felt like these roses were a message to him too.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed. This was one of my favorite chapters when I started planning this story out. This and another one that's coming up, because I'm a sucker for a little angst and pain haha...
> 
> My classes are going alright and thankfully don't seem to be too stressful hallelujah. I’m still sticking to my posting a chapter a week, but please understand the world is nuts right now so sometimes it might be a chapter every two weeks, especially when finals or midterms hit. I do understand your fears of abandonment (I’ve gotten some messages already lol) when it comes to L/Misa fics. Let’s all pour one out for the OG Rewrite. 
> 
> I hope you're all staying safe, thank you as always for your kudos and comments!


	7. The Tangled Thread

_  
I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed_   
_And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane._   
_(I think I made you up inside my head.)_

_-Sylvia Plath, Mad Girl's Love Song_

* * *

Misa drifted awake several hours later to the delicious aroma of food being cooked, the soft sizzle of something frying in a pan. For a few seconds she felt a sense of peaceful contentment cover her, something that reminded her of being a little girl again when her father would wake up early on weekends and make breakfast for her and her mom. She dug herself deeper into the blanket, trying to savor the feeling, but even as she did she felt it slipping away. Her eyes popped open.

Reality came back, her recollection of the night before souring her warm feelings. She'd refused to sleep in the guest bedroom the previous night and instead curled herself on the couch. She waited up for a long time before that however, determined to continue her conversation with L, to demand him to take her feelings seriously. He never came back.

She had paced around his apartment, throwing dirty looks at his office. As angry as she was with him she didn't snoop there, but she did explore his apartment a little more. It was mostly bare, so little personality in it besides the odd bits of extravagance. He had top of the line appliances that looked untouched. She spotted in the largest room an enormous king sized bed with crisp, stark white sheets that had probably never been slept in. In the adjoining master bath an ornate marble claw foot tub overlooked more stunning views of the city. Privately she longed to lounge in it, thinking of the tiny soaking tub at her own apartment, but stalked away from it resolutely.

Overall his home felt empty and dark, mirroring her own miserable emotions.

Now in the morning light, she noticed someone had draped the comforter from the guest bed over the top of her. She wondered if maybe he had done it until she noticed it was Watari in the kitchen cooking.

She stretched, shivering slightly before shyly getting up to see what he was making.

Watari looked much more relaxed than she usually saw him. His suit jacket was folded neatly over the back of one of the kitchen chairs and his shirt sleeves were rolled up. He wore a faded red gingham apron. He looked less like a 1940's butler and more like relaxed weekend grandpa. She smiled to herself and couldn't help but think how much it suited him.

He turned and noticed her watching. "Good morning Miss Amane."

"Good morning."

"I'm afraid I haven't prepared a traditional Japanese breakfast."

She could see eggs frying in the pan as well as bacon. He slipped two slices of bread into the sleek black toaster next to the stove. "Would you like some? Or I could try making something more traditional? There may be some miso soup I could prepare-?"

"No, this is fine thank you." She said smiling. She couldn't remember the last time she sat down for breakfast. She didn't exactly starve herself, but she relied on maintaining her size for modeling, skipping breakfast was the norm for her. Today however, she didn't care. _Not like I'll be working anytime soon._

He slid toast, eggs, and bacon on a small plate and poured her a glass of orange juice.

"I didn't know you cooked." She said as she took a small nibble of bacon.

He gave her one of his crinkly eyed smiles. "I don't often have the occasion to, but seeing as how there's a guest, I couldn't help myself." She felt her heart grow warm. He really did give off a grandfatherly vibe.

"Watari can I ask, how long have you known L?"

He didn't even look surprised by the name use. Something in his expression told her he'd been expecting it.

"Hmm...Since he was very young."

She knew not to ask anything too private, knowing L had probably swore him to secrecy. Despite her agitation with the detective, she felt intensely curious about his life. What he was like before she met him? What shaped him into the man she barely knew? Her curiosity was only intensified by the maddening privacy he maintained. She bit her lip before speaking up again.

"What was he like when he was a kid?"

"Oh, well let's see," The old man thought for a moment. "Much like he is now. Maybe a little more rambunctious. And of course smart. Sometimes too smart for his own good."

"I bet it was a pain to raise him then." She said nonchalantly, taking a bite of her toast. She watched as Watari's eyebrows raised in surprise. She correctly guessed then that it was Watari who raised him. It wasn't a far reach. She always assumed it, even if L sometimes seemed to treat him more as a butler. There was something paternal behind the looks Watari would give him.

The old man gave her a rueful smile. "No more than his brothers I can assure you."

_Brothers!_

He leaned in to whisper dramatically, "The real pain came when he became a teenager."

She giggled into her orange juice as she took a sip. He smiled again before shaking his head, sighing.

"Ah, perhaps I've said too much."

"I'll take it to the grave." Misa promised solemnly. She poked a hole into the yolk with the corner of her toast before nibbling on it again, watching the golden liquid spill across the plate.

She enjoyed the idea of a younger L. She imagined him just as Watari described: as he was now, but in miniature, probably stealing candy and solving schoolyard mysteries. And brothers! Were they just like him too? She was just about to ask if L was adopted or if he was related when she heard someone coming in from the elevator around the corner. She tensed as the man in question came into view. His eyes fell upon hers and she quickly looked away. She slid her unfinished plate across the marble countertop.

"What are you taking to the grave?" L asked as he handed a newspaper to Watari.

She ignored him. "Thank you for breakfast."

"Not at all." Watari said frowning. "Are you sure you've had enough?"

She nodded, her mouth set in a thin smile. "I should probably go."

She saw him exchange a quizzical look with L, who spoke again.

"Actually, I needed to speak to you in my office."

He slouched off in that direction. She followed nervously, feeling in a strange way like she was headed to the principals office. Would he bring up what happened last night?

He sat behind his desk and swiveled the screen so that she could see it too.

She sat on the couch, catching a look of her own reflection in the black screen briefly. Mortified by her bed head, she quickly tried to brush through her hair with her fingers.

"Misa, how well do you know Kana Kobayashi?"

As he said this, a picture of Kana popped up on the screen.

She blinked at him startled, not at all expecting the conversation to go in that direction. "Um, not very well, but I've worked with her a few times, why?"

"She's gone missing."

Misa froze.

He spoke again, answering her unasked question that hung in the air. "I do believe it is the same man who's been corresponding with you."

This time another picture popped up, roses crushed on the concrete out of an apartment, she could only assume it to be Kana's. Her stomach turned unpleasantly. She just worked with her a few weeks ago.

"Did you mention your stalker to her? Or any other models?" L asked intently.

"No." She said faintly. "I didn't even think to. I thought he was only interested in me. I should have said something."

He shook his head distractedly. "It may not have made any difference. You made the right move when you contacted me. I'll be meeting with your agency again soon. I have a feeling they're now more grateful for my assistance."

His voice had an edge to it and his eyes had the same intensity and excited gleam she often saw when he was delighted with getting his way. This turn in the investigation seemed to thrill him in a way, another twist in the cord for him to unravel. But this cord was her life, her livelihood, her coworkers livelihoods. A dark thought crossed her mind: Did it really matter to him if something happened to her? He seemed so unaffected by her confession and blew it off easily. He was caught off guard by the kiss of course, but wouldn't anyone be under those circumstances? She didn't give him a chance to respond. But If she disappeared, would he simply view it as an excellent move on the part of her stalker? A challenge to conquer?

_No._

She thought of how he held her hand the night before, the unexpected warmth. The occasional small glimpses of kindness she saw behind his eyes. She felt momentarily ashamed of herself for thinking of him that way, he wasn't a monster.

"How long has she been missing?"

"Two weeks at most. I've been searching through her social media. She's received messages from someone to meet, but I can't trace back to who it was with."

"You're sure it was my stalker though?" She asked anxiously, "Anyone could have left a rose right?"

He pursed his lips, staring fixedly at the screen. "Too coincidental. Regardless, I'm not going to stop looking. I contacted her family last night and organized a search for nearby areas. We'll find her."

So that's where he was all night. While she threw her little tantrum, he was out taking care of not only her, but another model too. She felt a fresh wave of shame envelope her.

"If that's all." She said quietly. "I kinda wanna go home now."

"Yes." He said preoccupied, already typing again on his computer. "Watari will take you. I'll have you stop by tomorrow to go over some casework with some of my team so we can establish a timeline."

She left thinking maybe she would try confessing once more then, let him know exactly how she felt, this time without throwing herself at him. She would show him that her feelings weren't just her being confused or lonely. Well, she _was_ lonely, but not so lonely that she would confess for no reason. Maybe a few days away from the incident would provide clarity for him, too.

But the next day proved her completely wrong.

"You don't have feelings for me, Misa." L explained patiently, popping a candied cherry into his mouth. "I'm a surrogate of some kind for you I imagine."

Matsuda sat awkwardly between the two of them at the large dining table, his eyes kept resolutely on the paperwork before him. She had tried keeping her conversation with him private, insisting they talk alone. L on the other hand, didn't see the need. As soon as he caught on to what she was insinuating he dismissed it at once.

Misa ground her teeth in frustration as he rattled on about her loneliness manifesting itself as feelings for him.

"So you're okay if I date other guys then?" She asked through gritted teeth.

He paused a moment eyeing her carefully before saying, "As long as he is properly vetted by my team I see no problem with that."

His words hit her like a slap to the face, but years of modeling taught her how to hide her disappointment. Misa sat up straight, fiddling casually with the straw in her drink. _Fine, if he wants to be like that._

"You know," She began sweetly, putting on her model voice. "Perhaps _Ryuzaki_ is right. Misa-Misa is so lonely at night now. With how the agency is with relationships...It's been so long since Misa has had a real boyfriend."

He continued to pick at the bowl of fruit next to him as he responded blandly. "As I said, as long as he is vetted by my team-"

"Oh I don't care either." She interrupted, waving a hand at him dismissively, pulling a mirror from her purse to check her lipstick, "As long as he keeps Misa happy in bed, just about anyone will do. Even someone like Matsuda." She paused and winked at Matsuda who flushed red, opening and closing his mouth like a dead fish.

Ryuzaki sat completely still as she said this, his hands scratching absentmindedly on the worn knees of his faded jeans. She eyed him slyly over her compact. But instead of rising to her bait he nodded calmly, his voice going low and as soft as velvet when he spoke, "As long as Misa is safe, I have no problem with her satisfying her loneliness."

She leaned over and reached across the table, stealing one of the cherries he had midway to his mouth and popped it into her own. " _Of course_ Ryuzaki doesn't."

His expression hadn't changed, but she felt a new spark of tension smoldering in the room. Even Matsuda felt it as he cleared his throat, clearly reminding the two of him he was still there.

"In that case, I'll let Light know I'm available tomorrow night."

She stood smiling to herself as she turned away.

"I said to stay away from him."

She turned on her heel to glare at him. "You just said as long as your team can check him out, I can date who I want. So check him out!"

But she knew that they had been already. She had peeked over Matsuda's shoulder and saw paperwork with details of Light's whereabouts for the last week. How long he had been following him she wasn't sure, but in her mind, if he hadn't arrested him or brought him in for questioning then he probably wasn't doing anything wrong. And most important to her: it made L angry.

She noted with some amusement that a muscle in his jaw was now flexing in irritation.

"You'll be followed on your date." He said in a low voice. "By someone on my team. From the moment you leave until the moment you're home."

"Fine." She shot back icily, " _That_ won't be different for me, I'm used to being watched anyway!"

Matsuda coughed again, desperate to relieve the awkwardness.

She grabbed her phone from her purse and began texting Light at once, fingers moving at lighting speed across the keyboard. She glanced up to see if L was watching, but he was back to looking over the paperwork before him, ignoring her completely.

As usual she ended up feeling more angry with herself than him. Maybe she was pushing herself on him and he really was totally disinterested in her. What was she expecting him to do? _I don't know, acknowledge me a little? Is that too much to ask?_

She stood slowly and headed towards the elevator, side stepping another agent who was bringing in a box of files for L to look over.

Watari stopped her. "Are you alright?"

She put on a quick smile. "Oh yeah I'm fine."

She looked over her shoulder again. L looked just as absorbed as before.

"Um, I think he's done with me. I'm just gonna go call my friend to come pick me up."

She quickly excused herself, not wanting Watari to see her miserable face as she ducked around the corner.

She checked her phone to see Light had already responded with the time he'd pick her up tomorrow evening. She felt a jolt of nerves tightening in her stomach. This would be good for her, she reasoned, to get out and do something normal for once. Her life the past couple of months had been so hectic and stressful. She wanted an escape from it all, if only for a night. Even if her heart ached when she thought of L, some distance would be healthy. She tried to convince herself it would be anyway.

* * *

For the third time that night L's phone went off from beside him. He flipped it open in irritation.

_I heard you've taken on a new case!_

_Do you need some help?_

_Your favorite little brother will be flying in from LA next month, just saying._

Watari seemed to know exactly who it was by L's exasperated sigh. "He'll just keep messaging until you answer him."

L didn't have time to pacify his brother. He also didn't need any help. What he needed was another cup of coffee, more sugar, and for a certain model to stop making his blood pressure spike every time she opened her mouth.

He grabbed a mug from the cupboard and set it on the counter next to the coffee pot, his mood darkening as he remembered her exact words.

 _"As long as he keeps Misa happy in bed just about_ anyone _will do."_

He inadvertently crushed a sugar cube in his hand as he thought of it. Yes, he had no doubt anyone would do. He was right then when he assumed she was just lonely, seeking companionship wherever she could get it. Still, he didn't like it being rubbed in his face. It was one of the rare circumstances where he didn't enjoy being right.

Especially when he could have easily let himself be the 'anyone' in that equation.

He took an absentminded sip of coffee, shuddering when the bitterness hit his tongue, realizing he hadn't put any sugar in.

Watari seemed to notice his preoccupation.

"Perhaps I should postpone my trip?"

Watari's flight to Winchester left in a few hours. He stood nearby holding his hat and long overcoat in hand, a look of concern on his weathered face.

L shook his head. "Go, it's fine. I'm just frustrated with this case."

Watari nodded, clearing his throat before speaking again. "Miss Amane also seemed somewhat upset today."

L grunted. "Yes, it seems she's often upset with me these days."

"It would be a shame," Watari said, placing his hat on his head, "to let someone else comfort her, but I'm sure she wouldn't have a problem finding that someone, would she?"

He suppressed a sigh. As usual, Watari had the uncanny ability to read L's moods and hit the nail on the head. But whatever idea the old man had gotten from watching the two of them needed to be quashed. "I agree she'll have no issue finding someone _suitable_ to comfort her." He glanced down at his watch. "Do you need me to call you a taxi to the airport?"

"Oh no, I think I'll manage just fine. I'll be back in a few days." He gave him a polite nod and headed out, leaving L alone.

He took the coffee with him to his office, eager to dive back into Kana's disappearance, and lose himself in work for a few more hours. It was only after he was settled back in his chair that he realized he again forgot to put sugar in. He took another sip, wincing. He'd just have to get used to the taste of bitterness.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this weeks update was a bit shorter and slower than others. The next chapter has a lot going on in it, I didn't want to pack too much into this one and overload it for pacings sake.
> 
> On another note, I have a Spotify playlist I made to listen to while I write this story, it's under the same name as this fic if you wanna check it out sometime. If you have song suggestions, lemme know I'm always looking for more music, of literally any genre I'm not picky.
> 
> Thank you for the comments and kudos!


	8. The Light

_  
  
"That man that hath a tongue, I say is no man,  
If with his tongue he cannot win a woman."_

_-Valentine, The Two Gentlemen of Verona_

* * *

Misa spent nearly 4 hours going over potential outfits and makeup looks she could wear on the date, obsessively comparing accessories and flipping through old magazines she had shot for to look for inspiration. She texted her options to Naomi throughout the day. So much so that eventually Naomi ended up just driving over after work that evening.

"So you're just going out with this man to make L jealous?"

"Yep." Misa chirped, shuffling through her closet. It was a mess of lace, ruffles, and velvet. For once she cursed her own taste in clothing. She barely owned anything that wasn't black. She found a few more options and tossed them onto the growing pile on the bed.

Naomi sighed. "I know he can be difficult, but surely you can work it out another way, without involving your boss."

"My bosses son." Misa clarified. "...and he's hot and rich and wants to take me out. Just be happy for me!"

She held up a black velvet mini dress next to a silky red one.

Naomi again sighed heavily, jerking her head at the black one. "I can't be happy for you, because I know this isn't what you really want."

Misa tossed the red dress aside, quickly stepping into the black one tugging it up to her hips and over her shoulders. She turned expectantly to Naomi to help her zip it up.

"Well it looks like I won't get what I want so I might as well have some fun at his expense. It's just one date."

She sat back down in front of her mirror, quickly rummaging through the messy drawer until she found her favorite shade of lipstick. She spread the blood red balm across her lips, cleaning the edges with a makeup wipe.

Naomi looked dubious. " _Just_ a date?"

Misa turned back to her in mock outrage, "Yes! You saw my underwear, it doesn't even match. Trust me, if he was getting lucky I'd pull out all the stops." She pulled the pins from her hair that had held it out of the way while she got ready and let it cascade over her shoulders in soft golden waves, ruffling it gently with one hand. She turned back to Naomi. "Well?"

"You know you're gorgeous."

"Yeah _I_ do, but would he think so?"

Naomi pursed her lips for a moment but relented. "Yes. I'm sure he'll feel very stupid for making you feel like you needed to go out with another man to get back at him."

Misa turned back to her mirror satisfied. Good, she hoped he did feel stupid. As she was getting ready she wasn't thinking of Light's reaction at all. She was thinking of L's. He would see her leave through her security camera and would surely get regular updates from whoever was following her for the night. Hopefully those updates would include lots of pictures. She wanted to make sure she looked her best because it was all for him.

"Where is he taking you?"

Misa got up to dig through her shoe closet, tossing a pair of red heels over her shoulder.

"No idea. He said it was 'dinner with a view'."

She slipped into the heels and admired herself again in the full length mirror. Yes, that was the look she wanted. Seductive, sweet and hopefully to L's eyes: maybe even looking to get lucky. He didn't need to know she was wearing her comfiest underwear.

"Do you want me to wait up for you?" Naomi suggested. "I don't mind staying behind. Someone should clean this mess..." She eyed the disaster zone that had become Misa's apartment in her mad dash to look perfect.

Misa shook her head. "No, why bother? I'll have an escort watching me the entire time until I get home."

She spritzed the air in front of her with her favorite soft vanilla perfume and walked through it, closing her eyes. _L would like this scent_ she thought smugly _I smell good enough to eat._

The doorbell went off.

"That's him! Okay, so I look good?"

Naomi rolled her eyes. "Yes, breathtaking now get out of here, go make him jealous I guess." She still looked unsure. Misa gave her a quick hug before grabbing her clutch and skipping to the entrance, she called over her shoulder in a loud whisper, "Lock the door when you leave!"

She opened the door to see Light looking just as dashing she imaged he'd look. Every time she saw him she was struck with the same reaction she had the first time she met him: _he should really be a model._ He stepped back to admire her.

"You look amazing!"

She feigned shyness as she looked down. _See L? Some people know a good thing when they see it._ She knew the camera was in the perfect spot to see her. She turned around, giving him(and L) a 360 view of her dress.

"Thanks!"

She closed the door behind her and allowed him to lead her down the stairs where a long black limousine waited.

"I hope it's not too ostentatious." Light said grinning. "When you agreed to go out I wanted to make sure I treated you the way you're probably used to being treated."

_The way I'm used to. Right._ Light held the door open for her, allowing her to slide inside. _I don't know about that, but I could get used to this._

* * *

The restaurant he took her to was inside of an expensive looking hotel she'd heard of but never been in before. Heads turned as they walked in, several members of staff greeting Light by name. His hand gently grazed her shoulders as he lead her to a more secluded corner of the restaurant.

The waiter sat them at a table near the largest windows overlooking the city skyline. Misa couldn't help but notice how empty it was around them.

"Where is everyone?" She asked curiously as she was seated.

"I called ahead to clear out this section for some privacy."

_Wow. So he can just do that? I'm definitely not the only girl he's taken here._

Another waiter came by placing menus before the two of them. Before Misa even had the chance to look it over, Light spoke up.

"Should I order for you? I come here often so I know what's best."

"Oh!" She said startled, "Yeah of course."

He sounded so self-assured, she felt like she had no choice. He was probably right, she reasoned, what did she know about Italian food?

"She'll have the carpaccio di capesante and I'll have the carre di agnello."

She watched as Light ordered, the confident way he did everything. He pointed almost carelessly at the menu at which wine he wanted, like he'd done it a dozen times. He probably had. While she definitely enjoyed dressing up and going out, she felt out of her depth. She hadn't gone on a date since high school. Guys back then obviously weren't going to pick her up in limousines and take her to expensive restaurants. She went to the occasional gala and event as a model, but usually with another model or her manager as an escort.

She looked up to see Light watching her, a half smile on his handsome face. She forgot how a man could just _stare_ at her. L barely looked at her, the agents he worked with paid her no mind except for Matsuda who she regarded as more a lost puppy. She smiled back at Light shyly, taking a quick sip of water.

Strangely though, she found herself missing the simple things about dating. Picnics, walks in the park, flowers...she shuddered. No, she was kind of sick of flowers at the moment. In her limited experience with Light he seemed to be used to the finer things. Not that he was a snob, everyone she talked to seemed to like him. Still he was mystery to her, perhaps more so than L.

"Everything alright?"

She looked up from her reverie. "Yeah, sorry just lost in thought. You're really a mystery to me."

"Let's fix that then." He said, his hands spread in a grand gesture over the table, "Ask me anything you want. I'm an open book."

_That's refreshing,_ she thought. She hesitated taking another small sip of water before speaking.

"Okay. Um...What did you go to school for?"

"Ah boring stuff at first. Computer science, technology, that sort of thing. Eventually it just made sense to switch to business since my father wanted me to take over the company."

"Wow you must be pretty smart then." She remarked. "So I guess running Facade isn't what you actually wanted to do?"

He paused. "No, it wasn't necessarily a dream of mine to run the company, but my father needs me. And I learned a lot of valuable skills." He checked the watch on his left hand, fidgeting with it a bit. "They still come in handy even if I'm no longer going into a technology field."

There was a certain playfulness to his statement that confused her. She decided not to push it.

"What about your family, do you have any siblings?"

He grinned. "A little sister. Here, let me show you." He pulled his phone out of his breast pocket. She couldn't help but compare it to L's battered old flip phone. Light's was sleek, shiny and looked fresh out of the box. He showed her a picture of a young girl holding some sort of academic award, grinning ear to ear next to Light.

Misa smiled, "I can tell you're proud of her."

He nodded taking his phone back. "You think I'm smart, wait until you meet her. She'll put me to shame one day."

_Wow, he even wants me to meet his family?_ She sat back slightly as the waiter brought out their food, placing an elegant plate before her. She didn't realize throughout the conversation she had leaned in to listen to him talk. He had a very magnetic personality she had a hard time resisting. _See? I can get used to this._ But even as she thought it, she still couldn't get L completely out of her head. If only she could have that sort of openness from him.

She dug into her food, taking small bites as they continued talking. She learned that he had studied overseas for a time. He hadn't had a girlfriend in quite a few years, citing issues with being so busy with work. She found that surprising and a little hard to believe. _Maybe he thinks that's what I want to hear?_

"What're your plans for the future?" She asked, gently patting her mouth, surreptitiously checking her lips in the reflection of her knife to see if her lipstick had smudged during the meal.

"Let's see...I'd like to start making some real changes at the company. Maybe even expand. I'd also like to be married soon."

She nearly choked on her drink. "Really?"

He gave her a reassuring smile. "I won't pop the question tonight, but I am very interested in settling down as soon as possible."

She let out a small giggle of disbelief. "So what, a house, a wife...kids too?"

He nodded serenely. "Exactly."

She smiled trying to put on a brave face of confidence like he had. "Sounds like you're after the perfect life."

He leaned forward, his brown eyes bright and intense. "Oh I am and I can be a very persistent man when I see something I want."

She blushed, looking down at her plate again, grateful when the waiter arrived to refill their wine glasses. She hadn't even thought that far into the future. Marriage? Children? She was only 23, a lot of models she knew retired by 25, and some did just as Light described. She didn't necessarily hate the idea of it, but thought it was still far too early for her to even think about doing that with anyone. Unbidden, of course, came the image of L wearing a formal black suit standing at the end of a long hazy asile. _He'd probably look really handsome_ she thought longingly, _well, if he fixed his posture_ she amended. But she couldn't really imagine him wanting to settle down with anyone. He'd probably live out the rest of his life solving case after case, cooped up in his penthouse or whatever mansion he lived in outside of Japan, keeping his distance from everyone around him. It darkened her mood as she took another bitter sip of wine. _Uhg focus on the guy who's actually showing you attention! Not that weirdo for once._

After they finished their meal, they took a short walk outside on the patio in the cool night air. He offered her his jacket and it hung loosely over her shoulders. They talked for hours about work, their hobbies and interests. He told her what an average day for him was like. He knew for the most part what hers were like based on their first meeting. Even though she wasn't working at the moment, she spared him the details of her most recent depressive state. That definitely wasn't attractive.

She found it incredibly comfortable to talk to him. He seemed genuinely interested in her and questioned her about nearly every aspect of her life. How long she had been a model? Did she want to do it forever? Where did she see herself in the future? She had a hard time answering the last one because she could only focus on surviving the present with a stalker after her and she told him so.

Light stopped walking as she said this. He turned to her. "Speaking of that, I wanted to ask you about something...this Ryuzaki guy." He said frowning, "Is he really doing a good enough job?"

She looked down at her her glass, swirling the liquid around distractedly. Of course his name would arise. She stayed silent as Light continued.

"It seems like he goes off and does his own thing and I just wonder if he's-no I shouldn't say it."

She looked up at him quickly. "No, please tell me what's on your mind!"

Light hesitated. "I just wonder if he'll really keep you safe. The handshake event. That other model going missing...These things happened after he took over your case, right?"

She stood quietly for a moment, looking out over the sea of lights. He wasn't saying anything she wasn't already worrying about herself, but she couldn't help but feel defensive over L.

"I think he's doing the best he can. Those things might have happened regardless." She said, her voice measured and careful. "I trust him."

"How do you even know him?" Light asked curiously, an underlying persistence to his voice as he backed her to a corner of the veranda near the railing.

Now she felt worried. Throughout the evening she was becoming more and more open with him, no doubt aided by her frequent sips of wine, even going into detail about her friendship with Naomi. But not even Naomi knew about how she met L. That would lead to knowing about the truth of her parents. Only L knew that.

"It's a long story." She said softly. "He just helped me out a few years ago. He solved...a big case then. I'm sure he'll do it again."

Light stopped, his tone skeptical as he leaned in towards her, his arm gripping the railing beside her blocking her in. "Five years is a long time. People change. You think he's really stayed on top of his game since then?"

Did she mention exactly how long ago it had been? She blinked down at the drink in her hand, deciding it was probably time to quit. She set it down on one of the empty tables near them, spilling it on the crisp linen tablecloth, watching the red liquid spread and seep towards the edge.

"I guess I'll just have to wait and see." She said weakly. "Is it okay if we head back inside it's getting kinda cold."

As she turned Light grabbed her wrist lightly, holding her back. "I just don't want something worse to have to happen to you for you to finally kick him to the curb and get help from someone who can really get you results. From someone who cares about you."

She looked down at where he had slid from encircling her wrist to holding her hand. The action felt both reassuring and restrictive. She felt almost guilty for allowing him to touch her. Which was ridiculous, it wasn't as if L wanted her. He made that clear. Could she really allow herself to seek help from someone else? To cut him out of her life before he inevitably cut her out? Would it save her some heartache later?

She couldn't think too hard about it, her head was already feeling fuzzy from the alcohol. "Thank you." She murmured, allowing him to continue holding her hand. "I'll consider it."

* * *

After they left the restaurant Misa felt sluggish, like a lead weight kept her movements from being as direct as she wanted them to be. She hadn't had any alcohol in months. Maybe even since the previous year, she was definitely a lightweight. _How many glasses did I have again?_ Through her inebriated haze she also felt like a shadow had followed her all night, keeping watch over her. She thought of her stalker. _It's fine...It's probably just whoever L hired to watch me._ Thinking of that, she hadn't noticed anyone tailing them all night. She assumed she'd get peeks of Matsuda or Aizawa in the fringes of the restaurant keeping watch, but she saw no one except Light most of the evening.

The ride back to her apartment was quiet. Light made polite small talk, but overall kept his gaze out the window, seemingly lost in thought. She was grateful for the moment of silence.

She had a great time with him. He was engaging, handsome, sweet. She thought of her mother who would surely approve if she was still alive. She always joked with Misa to find a rich man when she was older so he could take of her parents. Her father was more stern and probably would have not liked Light based solely on the fact that he was a man interested in Misa. He'd probably approve of L more readily. The thought made her smile.

Light walked her up to her front door, his eyes searching hers.

"I want to see you again. Soon. I want to help you with the next steps in your career." He reached out to push a tendril of hair behind her ear. "I think it's time you stop hiding away."

She nodded, feeling lightheaded as she giggled. Something about that particular action of pushing her hair aside was comforting and familiar, even though she knew he'd never done it to her before. "Thank you for everything. The date, your help. I'm so grateful for you, L."

_Shit!_ She heard her mistake the moment the words left her mouth.

Her cocked his head to the side. "What?"

She shook her head smiling sheepishly, "Light! I mean Light. I'm sorry it's the alcohol I think I may have had one too many."

He chuckled. "I can see that."

She looked up to see him leaning in, gently grabbing her by the shoulders, seeming to position her in a way that made her think he expected a kiss. Even in her hazy state of mind she was caught off guard. _A kiss? Already?_ She was rusty on date etiquette, but it felt too fast. _Hypocrite_ she thought, remembering how she threw herself at L. _It can't hurt to do a small one, right?_ She placed the softest one possible on his lips, noticing how cold they were in the chilly evening.

His eyes opened and for a split second she felt chilled by the look in them, unable to discern what she saw there. She blinked and they went back to normal, if anything they looked more concerned. She really couldn't trust her own eyes when she was drinking.

"Are you going to be alright?" He asked.

"Yeah I'm fine. Just tired." She assured him. "I had a wonderful night. Thank you."

He promised to call her in the morning, giving her one of his dazzling smiles. He left down the stairs, his driver hopping out immediately to open the door for him. She watched as he eventually drove off, leaving her alone.

She felt good to finally be alone. As wonderful a night she had, she looked forward to getting comfortable, maybe she’d text Naomi again to tell her about it. Well, maybe she’d wait until she was more sober. She didn’t want Naomi to think she spent the date getting plastered on purpose.

As she stood in front of her door, ready to unlock it however, she paused. Even through her muddied haze something felt off. The hair on the back of her neck stood up, and even though it was quiet, something akin to sirens began to go off inside of her, sobering her up slightly. She glanced up the security camera and noticed with alarm that it was shattered, hanging on by a thin wire, only the mount remaining. Heart accelerating, she began to dig into her small clutch frantically. Her lipstick and cell phone clattered on the pavement, but before she could yank her keys out, something hit the side of her head, knocking her to the ground.

She tried to sit up, gasping with pain, head jerking around to look for the intruder. She saw a large, hulking figure dressed in black, his features distorted by the night and the street lights behind him. He hit her again with something long, sending a shower of sparks behind her eyes. She cried out in pain. All she could do was hold her head for a moment, her vision temporarily blurry. She felt something warm running down her face into her eyes, stinging them. The figure jerked her up by her arm and began dragging her down the concrete stairs outside of her apartment. By now she was trying to kick away and scream. _I have to give L time._ She thought desperately. Even in her panicked state she knew he'd be on his way. He'd know something was wrong. He just needed time.

At the bottom of the stairs a black van waited with its doors wide open. _No!_ She cried out in earnest now as she was thrown down the last few steps, hitting the ground, hard. She felt a sharp, stabbing pain in her side.

_Not in there!_ She thought frantically. She could hear the man stomping down the stairs behind her. She began trying to drag herself away, desperate to get to her feet. Somewhere between her front door and the bottom of the stairs she lost her heels. Her bare feet dug into the ground trying to push herself up to a standing position. He quickly got a hold of her. She tried clawing at his face, hitting him, biting him, moving as erratically as possible. It wasn't enough; he was too strong. He grunted as he held her down in the back of the van, fumbling for tape. She could hear the sound of it tearing in his teeth as he secured her wrists, slapping another piece across her mouth. Even though her head pounded, she tried looking at his face. His eyes. _Who is it?_ He was unfamiliar. 

He shoved her roughly backwards into the van, slamming the door shut. Awkwardly, she tried to scramble up, but felt too uncoordinated. The metallic taste of blood in her mouth sickened her. She fell back down, her cry of pain muffled through the tape.

Faintly, she could hear a scuffle and yelling going on outside. She went very still, listening intently. After a moment the door was thrown back open. She wriggled backwards in fear, trying to ready herself for another fight, but it was L. He stood outside panting, his face frantic. Relief flooded through her. She tried sitting up again to inch towards him, but felt weak and dizzy, collapsing forward instead, the adrenaline beginning to leave her body.

He stepped in, swiftly picking her up and carrying her out. _I'm safe_ she thought delirious with relief, _he's here_. He set her down, carefully undoing her wrists, gently peeling back the tape on her mouth. Her legs wobbled beneath her, he steadied her.

"What happened?"

But she couldn't focus. Through the commotion she could hear sirens in the distance, the sounds of footsteps running. She swayed, struggling to keep her eyes open. He picked her up again carrying her to a side area of the apartment building where a small bench and patch of grass were.

"She may have a concussion, keep her talking." Someone called out...Aizawa? It was hard to tell. Her head pounded. "I have an ambulance on the way."

L set her down, cradling her head so it didn't knock against the ground. His dark eyes searched hers. Cool hands probed her ribs and then her face. When he pulled them back she could see they were shiny with blood.

"Where are you hurt most?" He murmured. "Where did he-"

She reached a trembling hand up to touch his cheek, noticing even through the fog of her pain and confusion how his shaggy hair stuck to his face in sweat, how the nearby streetlight cast a blue glow across his pallid skin, how _scared_ he seemed. She had never seen him look that way before. Her first instinct was to touch him, tell him she was okay. Better than okay because _he_ was there. He needed to know. The words got stuck in her throat as she spoke.

"I knew...you'd come." Was all she could say before the world went black.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you may notice there’s no peek into L’s thoughts this update and that’s because the next chapter is entirely from his perspective. This also means I’ll be taking my time to write it so don’t be alarmed if I take another two weeks again. On top of being busy with work and school, I got very sick recently which was annoying...it’s been a lot lol. Forgive me! Updating is slow, but it’s happening. Your comments are keeping me going so thank you as always.   
>  Hypothetically speaking, if I were to do a smutty/explicit one shot of LxMisa someday, what AU would you like to see? Would you rather it be in canon universe? What fic tropes do you like? Throw them at me, skies the limit.


	9. The Shadow

_  
  
As well as death, we'd mime marriage._

_I'd slide on a spectral ring_

_and you'd shiver at the thrill_

_of my thumb and fingertip_

_sealing the deal for a second till_

_the thought melted back into your skin._

_-Caroline Bird, Temporary Vows_

* * *

It was times like these L sincerely wished he had a vice to turn to. Drinking never appealed to him, having only gotten drunk once when he was teenager. He hated the feeling. The swimming head, the memory loss, the rancid taste in his mouth that came the morning after. He stayed away from drugs, pharmaceutical or otherwise, for the same reason. He just never understood the appeal of not being in complete control over ones own faculties, never needed that kind of escape.

Until now.

_"I knew...you'd come."_

Misa's hand went slack, her head rolling to the side. He froze. Sleeping after a concussion wasn't actually all that dangerous. Still, he worried she had some sort of brain damage that could go undetected if she stayed unconscious. Whatever she was hit with wasn't enough to crack her skull, he hoped anyway. It was hard to tell through the blood that matted her hair to her head. But head wounds were notorious for heavy bleeding and there was a long gash in her hairline.

He tried gently shaking her, saying her name. She remained motionless. He pulled the dark sweatshirt he wore over his head and bundled it under hers to keep it propped up. She never made a sound. Paranoid, he felt her neck for a pulse. It was there, drumming faithfully under his fingertips. He breathed out in relief.

Possibly she was just exhausted, the alcohol she drank certainly didn't help. His brain whirred through the possibilities. He had limited medical knowledge. It was obvious she'd need stitches. Based on how she winced when he carried her, he was sure she had a broken rib or two, if not broken they would be bruised. Those would heal in 4-6 weeks depending on severity. The concussion would heal on its own with basic care, barring any permanent brain damage.

That last thought made him nauseous. He felt bleak helplessness threaten to swallow him whole. _I should have stayed._

Flashing lights signaled the ambulance's arrival. He stood back as the EMT's hopped out got to work. He let them know what he knew based on his quick assessment. He watched as they loaded her up, her left hand dangled off the side of the stretcher for a moment before the doors shut.

"Follow them." He directed at Matsuda who arrived just before the ambulance. He stood looking pale and worried as L spoke to him. "No visitors. Don't let her out of your sight."

Aizawa approached from behind the van. "The van is registered to Teru Mikami. Petty thief, he's got no violent priors though. He hasn't been found yet but we've got police searching."

L nodded. "Get a team here for evidence retrieval."

"They're already on their way." He said now pointing a flashlight up at the stairs outside her apartment. "You think it was him? The stalker?"

 _Not a chance._ He had more finesse than to simply try to abduct her. Like L, her stalker preferred working from the shadows. Perhaps he was finally ready to have her, so he sent someone else to collect her? It didn't sit right with him. He wasn't sure why, but the entire attack was strange. It was messy and poorly coordinated.

"More likely hired by him." L murmured. They walked up the stairs to her apartment, careful not to disturb anything. One of Misa's high heel shoes lay on the top step, the other near the bottom, the thin ankle strap snapped. _She'd never be able to run away in those._

"When did you notice?" Aizawa asked, his flashlight pointed up at the broken security camera.

"A minute after she arrived home." L said frowning up at it. Another messy aspect of the attack.

"Matsuda was watching the cameras." Aizawa explained, "He saw someone approach and smash it. I got the call when I was already on my way here."

Nearby, a long iron wrench lay discarded. He crouched down to look at it more closely. It was bloodied, several blonde hairs stuck to the end of it. He felt nauseous at the sight. Blood had never bothered him before and this amount was minuscule compared to what he was used to seeing. Still, he had to stand back up and breathe for a moment.

"It's lucky you got here in time." Aizawa said, shaking his head in disgust as he now bent down examined the weapon. "He could have taken her God knows where."

_I knew...you'd come._

The attacker also could have easily killed her. Misa was probably a hundred pounds soaking wet. Her injuries weren't anything to laugh at, but they were miraculously minor compared to what they could have been. An inebriated woman wearing high heels would be easy enough to simply abduct without the theatrics of striking her over the head, dragging her down the stairs, taking the time to tape her wrists and mouth; it made no logical sense.

"He wasn't going to take her anywhere." L said quietly. "He had other plans."

_I knew...you'd come._

Apparently, she wasn't the only one who knew.

More nausea hit him. He leaned over the railing for a moment trying to settle his stomach. Aizawa stood and spoke with concern.

"Ryuzaki, are you alright?"

L nodded, "Is your car nearby I need to borrow it."

Aizawa raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Are we going somewhere?"

"I am. You're going to stay here until the team comes to collect evidence. I'll need your keys."

Aizawa handed them over, still looking worried. L carefully skirted down the stairs his head pounding.

It wasn't just nausea he was feeling, it was rage and guilt churning his stomach. He had watched her all night. He should have gotten there sooner, should have noticed faster what was happening. His hands gripped the steering wheel hard. His softer feelings were getting in the way of his rational thinking. He couldn't allow that to happen anymore. He was grateful for the time alone and the long drive to his destination. It gave him time to think over what happened that night.

* * *

Aizawa had dropped L off near Misa's apartment earlier that evening. L insisted on doing it alone, he didn't want Light recognizing any vehicles. Watari wouldn't have approved so he was grateful for his absence.

He stopped Naomi Misora outside of Misa's apartment. She approached him cautiously, arms crossed over her chest.

"What're you doing here?" She asked warily.

He held up a small tracker that contained a mic. It was tiny, barely visible between his thumb and forefinger. Naomi instantly recognized it and shook her head, looking repulsed.

"I'm not bugging her."

"You'd rather she be left unsafe?" L asked. "It's just a backup in case he takes her somewhere I can't get to. Like his apartment."

The former detective shot him with a pointed glare. "Are you insinuating she'll sleep with him?"

L shrugged. "She may choose to."

She snatched the bug from his hand with disgust. "Then you don't know her."

He received an angry text from her 30 minutes later. She'd placed it in Misa's purse.

_"Don't make me regret this."_

L was not usually a man prone to action. He preferred pulling the strings from behind the scenes. But he also wasn't one to let a learning opportunity pass him by. He stood in the shadows, waiting for Light Yagami to show up.

He'd donned a black hoodie, grateful fall was beginning to cool the air enough at night so that he didn't look suspicious standing around near the vending machines across from her apartment complex. He sipped on a canned coffee watching her front door, every now and then checking his watch.

A long black limousine arrived _. Putting on a show I see._ Light Yagami exited, checking his appearance in the reflection of the windows before heading up the stairs towards her front door.

Misa came out giving a little twirl. From his vantage point he couldn't get a good look at her. Thanks to the mic however, he could hear her conversation with him clearly.

"The Aman Hotel." He heard Light tell the driver. L's own ride, a taxi he called earlier to arrange transportation for the night, arrived right on time. He echoed Lights directions.

"The Aman."

He kept the earpiece in while he rode in silence. Their small talk didn't tell him much. Several minutes later his taxi pulled up to the Aman. He tossed several bills in the front seat, his eyes still glued to Misa's back. After a small gap in time he walked in. The concierge immediately halted him.

"Can I help you sir?"

L stopped, distracted. Looking into Light's dinner plans in advance let him know he'd have an entire section booked, L would have to sit somewhere out of sight. He watched as the two were lead into the restaurant.

"I have a room here." L said, his eyes still on Misa as she disappeared around the corner.

The concierge eyed L's rumpled appearance with displeasure.

"Under what name sir?" He asked, clearly skeptical.

"Hideki Ryuga." L replied, now digging into his pocket producing a wad of bills, peeling a few off. "Here. After you check my name this should also ensure my privacy. Excuse me."

He left the stunned concierge behind to sit at the bar in the restaurant, hood still pulled up. The bartender looked at him with the same skepticism as the concierge.

"Tea, please. And sugar."

"Sir, this is a bar-"

L reached again into his pocket, pulling out a few more bills to toss on the bar. When all else failed, money kept people happy and compliant.

The bartender collected them looking mollified. "You got it."

He could hear Light ordering for Misa. _Controlling_. He noted mentally. He sipped on the tea the bartender slid to him, absentmindedly plunking in sugar cube after sugar cube as he listened in.

"What did you go to school for?" Misa asked Light.

"Ah boring stuff at first. Computer science, technology, that sort of thing..."

L made another mental note. That part was true. When he dug through Light's background he saw how intelligent he was. Impressive even by his own standards.

Light Yagami also benefitted from having a wealthy, loving family. His father owned a popular modeling agency, his stay at home mother doted on him and his younger sister who was also gifted with intelligence. The perfect family with him as the perfect son. His grades throughout school were flawless, he was popular among his peers, as well as athletically inclined. He was awarded multiple scholarships, was accepted into a prestigious technology program...He had no where to go but up.

So learning that he had to switched to business in order to take over Facade confused L. It seemed like Light had been heading in an entirely different direction up until a few years ago when he took a strange interest in Facade. He read emails sent to Light expressing their disappointment that he wouldn't be pursuing technology any longer, that they'd hope he'd work for them at The Public Security Intelligence agency when he graduated.

The announcement of his fathers impending retirement solidified Light's next move: he'd take over. He began working at the modeling agency with his father right out of college.

It struck L just then that if Light had continued on his previous career path, the two of them would have surely crossed paths. Perhaps even working together someday.

"I'd also like to be married soon."

He could hear the shock in Misa's voice as she responded. "Really?"

 _Controlling. Moves quickly in relationships._ L wasn't sure on how traditional dating usually worked, but he knew _that_ wasn't exactly normal. He remembered when he was snooping through Light's past there was an ex girlfriend he'd been unable to track down. All he knew was that the two dated briefly in high school. He didn't have many other relationships otherwise, which L found strange given his obvious popularity and wealth.

Misa echoed L's own thoughts. "Sounds like you're after the perfect life."

It did indeed. Marriage. Children. The cookie cutter life. Though perhaps L just didn't get it. Maybe it was the norm for some people, to move very quickly. He thought of Misa's hand, small and delicate with a diamond ring glittering on it. In the context of belonging to Light however it looked like it weighed a thousand pounds.

"I can be a very persistent man when I see something I want." He heard Light say.

 _Unfortunately for you that isn't going to happen_. He couldn't control Misa, but if Light did have something to do with her stalker like he thought, he'd never let him get the chance.

L was surprised at how much he learned about Misa as she spoke with Light. After the two finished their meal, they took a stroll outside. He could almost imagine himself there, walking beside her instead of Light. He could imagine her small smiles and soft sighs through the cadence of her voice. She didn't want to be a model forever, but she still enjoyed it. She mused about getting too old for the profession. _You're not_. He thought dismissively. She still looked the same as when he first met her, he doubted anyone could rationally call her 'old'. She talked about singing, how she wished she could do it more because it made her happy. _Then you should._

She brought up her own future, pausing as she said softly, hesitantly. "I do...want to get married someday too."

He could almost see the pale pink flush warm her cheeks, causing her to look away in embarrassment, because she was admitting something important to her. Something that made her feel vulnerable. When she spoke again her voice was wistful.

"My parents, when they got married, it looked so sweet and simple. I saw pictures of it. They eloped somewhere overseas on vacation. It was outside in the spring, my mom wore a pretty white dress. I've always wanted something like that."

He could hear an underlying current of sadness weaving its way through her words. _You can_ , he thought insistently. _You've got time to find someone who can give you that._ He could see her, just as she described. Dressed in a gauzy white gown in a misty, shaded grove surrounded by honeysuckle and bellflowers. Except it was someplace only _he_ was familiar with. It was near the orphanage where he grew up, where there was a popular wedding destination near the forest. When there weren't weddings he and the other kids would play there. He hadn't thought of it in years.

"But it's hard to even think about stuff like that with this creep after me. I feel like he's taken my future."

Yes, there was that.

But he would make sure she was safe. He wouldn't her future be robbed from her. He'd solve her case and leave her with a future that was wide open for her.

...but what if he was wrong about Light Yagami? He'd certainly snatch her up and make her his. If not Light, there would always be some other man eager to take his place. L wasn't ignorant to the noticeable appeal she had. He'd found her attractive since the day he met her, even if her attitude sometimes detracted from her beauty. He was professional about it in a way he never had been with anyone before. For some reason, in his mind, Misa Amane was strictly off limits to him. He regarded his attraction to her as simple, obvious. She was a lingerie model and he wasn't blind.

He thought of how she kissed him, the way he replayed it over and over in his head since. The way he usually ended up imagining an entirely different ending to the scenario when he was alone...It meant nothing. Even if now there was something in his attraction to her that was distinctly possessive, magnetic. It's what made him decide to personally follow her that night.

"...this Ryuzaki guy, is he really doing a good enough job?"

That, and his deep mistrust of Light Yagami.

L was shaken from his thoughts. For a while, he could pretend Light wasn't there at all. He listened as Light spoke again, his words oozing in false sincerity.

"I just wonder if he'll really keep you safe. The handshake event. That other model going missing...These things happened after he took over your case, right?"

L felt agitated hearing this. Because he was right. It wasn't the open and shut case he assumed it would be. Light's tone, however, seemed to imply he was trying to plant some seed of doubt about L's abilities. He could hear Misa's voice harden slightly as she spoke. "I trust him."

He felt undeserving of that praise. He'd done nothing but get stuck deeper into the case, angering and confusing her in the process.

She complained about the cold, wanting to head back inside, but L could hear the tightness in her voice.

L got up from the bar, from the way they were talking the date was about to come to an end. At the restaurant at least. He needed to get back to the taxi to be ready to follow them back. He could see Misa and Light coming around the corner already. He made sure his hood obscured his face and headed out the door.

He tapped on the window of cab driver who lay sleeping in the front seat. L had paid an obscene amount of money to guarantee he'd have a quick ride back. The cab driver jumped at the sudden noise and after looking up to see L he quickly had the back door open for him.

"Did you enjoy your meal sir?"

"Yes, very interesting." L murmured preoccupied, still looking out for Light's limo. At last it slowly rounded the parking lot.

"Follow that limousine." L directed. "Stay far enough back that they won't notice."

The cab driver shook his head in bewilderment, but did as he asked. Through the earpiece he could hear very little conversation. He wondered darkly if it was because her lips were otherwise occupied. Were there a pair of hands running up her smooth thighs, under her short dress, was her back arched against...he gnawed at his thumbnail until he tasted blood. No, he could hear no difference in her breathing to imply any sexual activity. It didn't make him feel any less eager to have her home though.

They pulled up to her apartment. L got out quietly, tossing more bills at the thrilled cab driver, asking him to wait a few more minutes.

He could see Misa stumble a bit after she left the limo, steadying herself against the handrail. _How much did you drink?_ He frowned watching Light lead her up the stairs. She looked off balance. He felt antsy. _Don't invite him in._

He dug his hands into his pockets pacing across the street, as she and Light spoke.

"I'm so grateful for you, L."

His head snapped up. Had she seen him? No. It was a mistake. From his place in the shadows he could see her clap a hand to her mouth, quickly explaining her slip. 'Too much to drink.' It made sense, but he couldn't help but foolishly hope she'd been thinking of him.

No doubt incensed that she'd said someone else's name, Light leaned down allowing her to press her lips to his. L expected it of course, even so he felt a swell of equal parts resentment and longing strike him. He assumed she'd go back to Light's place or at least invite him in, but she didn't. After all her talk about wanting someone to warm her bed, she wasn't going to?

 _Then you don't know her._ Naomi's words came back to him.

Perhaps he didn't, but he knew her much better now. He watched Light head down the stairs and into his limousine, noticing the sour look on his face. It looked like he too expected more.

L sighed, heading back to the waiting cab across the street. Aizawa would be there soon to start his shift watching her apartment. She'd gotten home safely, his job was done. He got inside the cab, directing the driver to his apartment.

It wasn't a minute into the drive, just as he was about to take the earpiece out when he heard a sharp intake of breath. He went very still, listening intently. The sound of her purse falling, a shriek, a sickening thud.

"Stop!" He yelled.

The cab driver frowned at him through the reareview mirror. "What?" He began slowing the car to the curb, "Whats wro-"

But L had already jumped from the vehicle, tumbling hard on the ground before sprinting back up. There wouldn't be enough time to explain, to make the driver turn around in time. He ran through the streets, the earpiece blaring the attack over his panting. He could feel every gasp of pain as if he was the one being hurt. Her panicked cries stabbed into him.

Furious and terrified, he leapt over the fence behind her apartment building. His legs pounded into the pavement, jostling the earpiece out. _Hang on_. He was close, he was almost there. He rounded the corner in time to see a man in black slamming the doors to a white van shut. _He has her._ The man turned in time to see L launching himself at him.

His fist connected with the mans jaw, causing him to grunt and fall backwards. Blinded by fury, L prepared to attack again, only to see the man getting to his feet and running away towards the back alley.

Conflicting desires kept L frozen for split second. Go after the attacker or check on Misa. Anger pulsated through him, along with the intense desire to tear the man apart.

The muffled cry from inside the vehicle made the decision for him.

He wrenched the doors to the van open to see Misa curled up against the other side of the van, her eyes wild with fear and then relief. A relief that was mirrored inside of him. A relief so powerful it felt acutely like pain, it sucked the air from him, he could drown in it.

* * *

Now, hours later, he pulled into the hospital parking lot, turning off the ignition. He sat there quietly, his hands still gripped on the steering wheel. He was sure Light had something to do with it. He remembered something he said to Misa that night.

_"I just don't want something worse to have to happen for you to finally kick him to the curb..."_

Too coincidental. The failed attack was an attempt to divide Misa from L. It was a gut instinct, he knew it.

Initially, he drove to Light's apartment. He meant to confront him, to do something with the anger that coursed through him. He was frustrated that he didn't bring a weapon. He sat outside contemplating his next move...

But then he remembered Misa's eyes, the undeserved gratitude in them, the way she caressed his face to comfort him even though she was the one hurt...and it watered his rage, tempering it enough to see reason. If he went to Light, he'd end up doing something he regretted, it could compromise the case. It would be bad for Misa in the long run, he couldn't risk it. He wouldn't.

It was more important to see with his own eyes that she was safe. And besides it wasn't Light he was most angry with, it was himself.

He found his way to her room in the hospital where Matsuda waited on a plastic folding chair outside. He straightened up when he saw L.

"She'll be okay." He explained before L could even ask. "She's got a broken rib, a concussion, and she got stitches. But the doctor said most of it would heal on its own with rest."

L's shoulders sagged with relief. Just as he hoped. Matsuda continued, "She'll be released tomorrow morning, where should I take her?"

He wouldn't make the mistake of having her out of his sight again. Not until the case was solved.

"My home." He said quietly. "When she's released take her there. Don't make any stops and let me know the moment you leave."

Matsuda nodded and then added hesitantly, "She asked about you earlier, should I tell her you're here?"

"No. Let her rest. I should head back." He paused to look through the hospital window at her. Her head was turned so he couldn't see her face. He was grateful for that. He wondered if she had time to start feeling less grateful for him.

He turned to Matsuda. It was strange. He knew it was his job, that he was there for the paycheck and perhaps a good reccomendation when the case was solved, but he couldn't help but feel especially grateful for the detective.

"Thank you."

Matsuda nodded, looking over at Misa through the glass. His eyes looked red rimmed but alert. "I won't let anything happen to Misa. No one is getting by me."

L almost smiled. "Of course not. I'll see you in the morning."

He made a note to make sure Matsuda was given a hefty bonus.

* * *

The eventful night caught up to him as he arrived home, leaving him feeling hollow, exhaustion settling into his bones. As the elevator reached his floor however, he could hear the TV in his apartment. Watari wouldn't be due back for another day at least. That meant someone else was paying him a visit.

He walked in cautiously, but the errant chocolate wrappers strewn on the marble countertop in the kitchen told him what he already deduced.

Mello lounged on the sofa in the living room, his black boots dangling off the edge. Shoes inside, a bad habit he brought home from overseas.

He was reading the magazine L had bought weeks earlier, the one with Misa on the cover. He pulled it down to address L casually.

 _"Misa-Misa?"_ Mello said doubtfully, "Tell me this isn't the case you've been stuck on?"

He tossed aside the magazine. It fluttered face down on the floor. L picked it up by the corner, carefully setting it on the coffee table.

"No greeting?" Mello sighed dramatically. "Not happy to see your favorite brother?"

"Welcome." L said dryly, eyeing the mess he'd made. "Make yourself at home."

He sat up, still grinning at L. Mello was his younger brother in name only. Being raised in an orphanage meant L got to know many children throughout his life. They came and went, often he didn't bother to learn some of their names. Only a very small few ever felt like actual siblings, bonded by more than blood. He remembered when he was around twelve years old, yelling at Mello for being 'like an annoying brother' after he spilled chocolate milk all over one of L's homework assignments. He'd said it with the intention to hurt him, make him stomp away in anger or else tell on him. Instead, it had the opposite effect: he was _thrilled_.

"I heard from a model I was fooling around with last week that Misa-Misa was number one around here until she went crazy on a fan at a meet and greet."

"Is that so?" L asked uninterested, now bending to pick up the other wrappers Mello had carelessly thrown around.

"And," Mello continued. "From what I heard from Watari, it _looks_ like you're following way too many rules."

He was right about that. Misa's case had him going by the book more than he'd have liked. He got search warrants, organized meetings...things he never bothered to worry about before. He solved cases, kept people alive long enough to testify, for the truth to come out. Then he left. But her case was different. As much as it pained him to admit it: he cared about what happened to her afterwords. Perhaps too much. He wouldn't be apart of her life of course, but he wanted to make sure he left as little mess as possible when he did leave. She deserved that much.

He'd done a poor job so far. She sat half beaten and broken in a hospital room for all his help.

L headed into the kitchen, grabbing a glass to fill at the faucet, digging through a cabinet nearby for ibuprofen. He shook a couple into his mouth and gulped down the cold water. His head was pounding. As much as he wanted to sleep he needed to stay awake. He had too much to look into before he could let himself rest.

Mello had followed him in. He'd brought the magazine in to flip through again. He turned a few pages, stopping on one of the more revealing pictures of her. He eyed it speculatively as he spoke.

"So you're helping this lingerie model with a stalker. You wanna explain to me why you took this case?"

"Not really. This isn't something I need help with." He said coolly, "Why are _you_ here?"

Mello looked slightly sheepish. "I might have gotten mixed up in a little bit of trouble let's just say...So I caught an earlier flight."

Most likely illegal. But if anyone was to blame it was L, who often skirted the rules when he needed to. Of course Mello would follow suit as he got older. The difference between them was that L waited until it became necessary to bend the rules, Mello rushed in head first regardless.

"And after talking to Watari I knew you needed help."

"I don't." L reiterated, grabbing a container of loose tea down from the cabinet and scooping some into a small bag.

Instead of listening, Mello dug a folder out from a leather bag that hung from the back of one of the kitchen chairs, sliding it across the marble countertop. L grabbed it and flipped through it quickly, inside were several headshots of Mello, a list of references...

Mello beamed at him proudly from across the counter. "That's too bad. Because you're looking at _Facade's_ newest model."

"You're...becoming a model now?" L asked blankly.

"As your best looking and smartest brother it made sense to go undercover for you. You're welcome."

"Smartest?" L said mildly, now filling an electric kettle with water. "I didn't realize Near would be helping you."

Mello scowled from behind him. "He's too busy being a perfect little prodigy to get any real work done." He hopped up on the counter smiling smugly. "So? I start this week. I can give you intel. Pretty smart, Right?"

L sighed wearily. Mello's constant need for validation had to stem somewhere from childhood. His youngest brother didn't have that issue, so it wasn't just an orphan trait. Perhaps it would have been better if he'd been adopted out to a real family, then L wouldn't be put in this position.

Though, as much as he hated to admit it, he could possibly use the extra help. Misa would be out of work for a while. Having an inside man could prove beneficial.

"I'll take your assistance." L said slowly, "...but I want another set of eyes with you. I'll hire your manager tomorrow."

Mello laughed, "Fine, fine. Plus you'll be happy to have me around I brought some toys with me."

He produced a small handgun and set it on the counter, admiring it. "So much easier to get these overseas."

L looked at the handgun. It'd been a while since he had to use one. Tonight if he had it...

"You look like shit by the way." Mello said, interrupting his thoughts. He nodded at L's shirt as though he was just getting a proper look at him. L looked down to see the dirt and blood stains on it. Misa's blood. Mello frowned at L's hand that was holding his teacup. His knuckles were slightly bloody too and scraped from when he hit Misa's attacker.

Mello's frown of concern quickly melted into a smile of intrigue.

"You may be breaking more rules than I thought."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and leaving comments as usual ❤️ I hope you’re all safe and well. Thank you for the one shot suggestions last chapter!  
> A note on character ages: since this is an AU their ages aren’t exactly the same as in DN. L for instance is around 28, Misa 23, Mello 22, etc.


	10. The Open Wound

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content Warning: brief mention of rape/sexual assault.

_ _

_What do I owe to you  
Who loved me deep and long?  
You never gave my spirit wings  
Nor gave my heart a song. _

_But oh, to him I loved,  
Who loved me not at all,  
I owe the little open gate   
That led through heaven’s wall._

_Debt, Sarah Teasdale_

* * *

Misa had never been in that type of pain before. Her entire body felt as though she'd been ran over by a truck. She was weak, achey, and according to her doctors, the concussion would leave her feeling foggy and confused for a few days at least. She would also have to wait several weeks on her broken and bruised ribs to heal.

Every deep breath she took felt like someone stabbing into her side. She was told multiple times how lucky she was that it wasn't worse. She had to stop herself from snapping at a nurse who kept insisting that Misa was fortunate. They hadn't gotten their head bashed and thrown in the back of a van by a strange man.

She tried not to think too hard about it.

Matsuda carried her bag from the hospital. She was a little embarrassed that earlier he had to go out and buy her clothes to wear from it, since her little black dress from the date ended up covered in dirt and blood. He didn't seem to mind however, and acted especially protective over her-which she found endearing.

He lead her into L's apartment, constantly turning to ask if she needed anything, maybe they should have gotten a wheelchair for her and was she _sure_ she was feeling alright?

"I'm fine." She reassured him. "I'm just tired."

It was hard to get any rest. Her mind ricocheted from gratitude towards L and feeling panicked that she was almost taken. If L hadn't been there...

 _I can't focus on that. He was there. He saved me._ She only wished he would have come to see her while she was in the hospital. Matsuda said he did, but he never came in to talk to her. She wanted to thank him, to tell him what it meant to her, what it was like seeing him open the door and carry her away. It was the only memory from that event she would cherish.

Matsuda helped her to the couch in L's living room. Her new home for the foreseeable future. She figured as much afterwords. She wouldn't be able to live alone until her stalker was caught. She didn't mind. She hated the thought of being left alone at the moment.

L walked out from the master bedroom, his arms full of folded clothes. He paused at the sight of her. She wondered how bad she must look. She tucked her hair behind her ear nervously.

He opened his mouth to speak, but the sound of quick footsteps clicking on marble tiles alerted them to Naomi's arrival.

Her eyes moved from Misa sitting on the couch to L. Her mouth was set in a thin line and there was a fire behind her eyes.

Misa started to say hello, but Naomi walked past her and slapped L hard across the face.

"Naomi!" Misa cried out in shock, hand clutching at her side in agony as she jolted up. L staggered slightly, dropping the clothes to the ground. Matsuda gawked at her, edging away and excusing himself, wisely deciding not to get involved.

"Just what the hell are you good for?" She yelled. "How could you let this happen?"

Misa winced as she tried sitting up. "Naomi wait-"

She ignored her.

"You should have protected her!" She hissed. "You said she'd be safe!"

L's face was still turned away from when she slapped it, a red mark now appearing.

"Please don't fight! It's not his fault." Misa said weakly, "Really, how could he have known-"

"No, she's right, it is my fault." L said quietly. "I take full responsibility. I should have been more careful."

Naomi still glared at him, nostrils flaring in anger. "Put me on your team. I don't trust you to do this alone."

Misa felt a knot tie in her stomach as L responded, sounding surprised. "You'll come out of retirement?"

"No, Naomi," Misa pleaded. "You quit for a reason right? Please don't do this just for me!"

Naomi finally turned to Misa. All the fire was extinguished leaving concern there in its place.

"I can't stand by and watch you get hurt again."

Misa bit her lip, trying to keep herself from getting upset. Already too many people were putting themselves in harms way to keep her safe. It was too much. She was becoming more and more of a burden on everyone she cared about.

Seeming to read her mind, Naomi sat with her, speaking more kindly. "Think of it this way. He's not only hurt you, he's hurt other women too. Your coworkers, remember? He won't quit until someone stops him. The more of us looking for him, the better."

But Misa couldn't just see it that way. Maybe she was being selfish, but she thought of her family, taken away from her too soon, leaving her alone to figure everything out. She had so few people in her life that she cared for. And they were all getting involved with something that was becoming increasingly more dangerous. Her head was beginning to pound.

"I'm tired." She said wearily. "I need to lay down."

Naomi nodded, her brow still creased in concern. L pointed to the master bedroom he'd just come from.

As Naomi helped her up, Misa glanced at L who stood there awkwardly, staring at her. She wanted the chance to speak to him alone, but her head wasn't cooperating. _I'll have time._ She thought. _I'm basically living with him now._

* * *

After a fitful and restless few hours in bed Misa woke up. Despite the mountain of pillows she used to cradle her injured side, she still ached every time she took a deep breath. It was a few days after the attack and her headaches were finally starting to subside, and she didn't feel as foggy or forgetful. She stood in the huge master bathroom after her shower, carefully pulling back her hair to look at the gash more fully in the mirror, wincing. There were several neat stitches on it that she'd get taken out the next day at the doctor. She needed to put more cream on it which wouldn't be so bad if she didn't have to raise her arms to do it, causing her muscles to tug against her injured side.

She thought of asking L for help, but given how distant he'd been towards her over the past couple of days she thought better of it. _I'll just do it later._

She padded back out into the bedroom. L had been gracious enough to have her stay there rather than one of the guest bedrooms. He assured her he hardly slept in there. Still, she was a little embarrassed.

She pulled a pair of black leggings from the drawer, noticing L had left some of his own clothing behind. A neatly folded pile of white shirts. She pursed her lips, pulling one out.

 _Is this really the only shirt he owns?_ It was soft though, and loose. The clothes she had Naomi bring from Misa's apartment fit her too snugly, more built for sexiness rather than comfort. And since she wasn't exactly in the right state to be sexy, she needed to prioritize comfort. She pulled L's shirt gingerly over her head, careful to avoid exerting herself too much. It was long on her, falling past her thighs. She pushed back the sleeves, looking in the full length mirror that leaned against the opposite wall. She couldn't help but smile a little. Something about wearing something of his felt intimate and warm.

She opened the door peeking out. L's office was dark, which meant that he was gone again. After Naomi left a few days before, he'd mumbled about needing to get work done and disappeared. Where he spent most of the week she wasn't sure, but she was starting to get lonely being in the apartment by herself all the time. She tried keeping herself busy with watching TV, checking her phone constantly, but with even Naomi busy now, she was growing bored. At least he had the sense to make sure to stock real food in the kitchen now.

The penthouse was quiet. The sky outsid _e_ now dark. She made a habit of napping throughout the day to pass time and as a result hadn't eaten since that morning. _Maybe I'll make a snack..._

As she headed to the kitchen however, past the living room she froze.

There was a man was laying on the couch.

He turned his head towards her as she stopped. "Ah Misa-Misa." He said, his tired voice having a somewhat teasing tone. "You look different with clothes on."

"Who are you?" She whispered. Her heart sputtering into action. _I left my phone in the room I'm so stupid-_

His head turned, as if he was confused by her reaction for a moment before he quickly spoke again. "I forgot you've got someone after you. I promise I'm not him." He raised his hands in mock defeat. "I'm L's brother, Mello."

She breathed out a sigh of relief, hand pressing over her pounding heart. "You should have said so sooner!"

He shrugged. "I told you I wasn't your stalker."

 _Yeah, that's very reassuring._ She thought despairingly.

While he didn't look anything like L, with his honeyed hair and more obvious European features, they both had the same dark, pronounced under eye circles. She wondered if all the men in his family had something against a good nights sleep. He also dressed completely different from L, all black, leather and edge.

She walked over cautiously, sitting down on the loveseat across from him. She was so interested in people who knew L. With Watari still gone she had no one to talk to. _I wonder if he'll mind._

"Um, are you waiting for him to get back or something?" She asked curiously.

"Oh he's not here?" He said, looking mildly surprised, nodding his head towards the room she came from. "I assumed he was in there with you."

Her face burned. "What? Of course not! Why would he be?"

A knowing smile lit up his face, he tucked his arms behind his head. "Oh did I hit a sore spot? Well, don't worry. I've seen him sleep with tons of his clients. You're probably just too beat up to mess around with."

Her mouth fell open in shock. _This guy is nothing like L!_ He laughed at her expression. "Don't look so offended. I'm just surprised that he hasn't already."

"Well he hasn't. He's very professional." She shot back at him acerbically, not at all wanting to admit she was the one always trying to make a move on him. "Why are you here?"

"I just got back from a photoshoot, thought I'd take a nap before asking L something." He yawned, stretching his body with a grunt. "I thought I'd just have to sit there looking pretty for 20 minutes. Instead they had me there for hours trying on clothes, taking pictures. They want me back in another hour or so, but I skipped out..."

"You're a model?" She asked doubtfully. He definitely wasn't terrible looking, he had a certain appeal to him-if you ignored his crappy attitude, but she found the idea strange. Not that L would ever mention It to her.

"Should I tell you?" He mused, mostly to himself. "I'm not sure. It's top secret stuff."

He seemed to enjoy holding information over her head. She rolled her eyes. "I'll find out anyway." Now that Naomi was helping L she planned on getting every bit of information she could from her.

He nodded, seeming to weigh the likelihood of that happening. "Maybe. I guess I can tell you a little bit."

He swung himself up suddenly and smiled widely, "I just started at Facade. I think you've heard of it."

Her agency?

"What for?" She asked slowly.

"Undercover." He said, his tone smug. "L wants me to get information on why someone would be stalking _you_."

Oh. That made a little sense. Still, she wondered why his attitude towards her was so hostile. "Obviously this guy is just a creep who wants to date me, right?"

He scoffed. "That's dismissive. There's lots of creeps who don't stalk women. And you're not any more special than the other models I met today. In fact, there's quite a few I personally find very-."

"Do you just like to insult people or something?" She interrupted annoyed. Not five minutes talking to him and she was already disliking the guy immensely. He had a self important aura to him she was finding more and more off putting.

"Do you want to know why I don't stalk women?" He asked, ignoring her jab.

"Why?" She asked sarcastically.

"I don't need to." He said confidently. "If a woman doesn't have something I want, I move on."

"Okay and my stalker is...?"

"He's after something. It probably doesn't make sense, especially to the average person. They're never as logical as they think they are, and they always think they're geniuses, but he's locked on to you of all people. We need to know why."

At least so far he seemed smart like L. But he was also wild and tactless. Where L was more measured and careful, Mello had a fierce tenacity to him. It was interesting that the two of them were close enough to consider one another family. She could now see why Watari said L wasn't any worse than his brothers. She couldn't imagine the headaches that one caused.

"Just how many brothers does L have?" she asked curiously. She watched as he leaned back into the sofa, another self assured grin on his face.

"That means he hasn't told you." He said shaking his head. "Sorry, brotherly bonds outweigh a clients curiosity."

She pursed her lips. _So irritating._ "Whatever I don't care then."

He stared at her strangely for a moment, tilting his head as if he was trying to figure something out. She felt self conscious under his scrutiny. Something about it made her feel as if he was able to see things she didn't want him to, make connections without seeing the whole picture. The last thing she wanted him to know was how she felt for L.

He jerked his head up at her forehead. "You should take care of that or it'll leave a scar."

"I'm fine." She sniffed. "I'll take care of it later."

"Don't be stubborn." He got up with a heavy sigh and grabbed the first aid kit Naomi had brought sitting on the coffee table. He squeezed some antibacterial cream onto a finger.

Alarmed, she sat back feeling wary. She wanted to stop him or tell him she was fine again. Especially since she didn't much care for the proximity, or his sudden, odd bout of kindness.

"How did you learn about my brother?" He asked, dabbing the cream lightly along her forehead with his ring finger.

"Top secret." She muttered.

He stopped and looked at her pointedly.

"He helped me out a few years ago okay?" She said, dodging the question. "Watari introduced us."

He nodded, something in his expression told her he was making more of those connections. "I'm just not used to seeing him like that." Speaking again more to himself than her.

This piqued her interest. "Like what?"

But just then, L walked in. She hadn't heard him enter, too absorbed in her bickering with his brother. He paused at the sight of the two of them. Misa felt her stomach summersault inside of her. She missed him.

"There you are." Mello said, his voice bored as he continued to apply the cream to her head, "Someone has to take care of your woman."

She glared up at him, trying to smack his hand away as she blushed furiously.

"I'm not his woman. Thanks."

He stood back shrugging, tossing the tube back into the box on the table.

"There. Can't mar your only valuable asset."

 _My only valuable-What a jerk!_ His attitude towards her made no sense. He bounced back and forth from being friendly to being a complete asshole _. Is this what having a brother is like?_

"I hope L's other brothers a lot are nicer than you." She said haughtily.

He gave her an angelic smile as he spoke, his dark voice going sickly sweet. "You'll never meet them so it doesn't matter."

That stung. She gave him a reproachful glare. He knew exactly how to wound her, and she was right; He definitely saw more than she wanted him to see. He could tell she had feelings for L. What she didn't understand, was why he seemed to resent her for it.

L watched the exchange before speaking, his smooth expression blank.

"I have your new manager here."

Mello smiled, "Good. Glad I'll be useful unlike some-"

But the blood drained from his face. " _Shit_."

Someone had entered behind L. A beautiful looking woman in a tight black pencil skirt and turtleneck. She had sharp eyes and red lips that were currently curved into a graceful smile as her eyes landed on Mello.

"What're you doing here?" He asked incredulously. His eyes darted between the two of them in disbelief.

"Mihael." She said, her voice crisp and businesslike. "Good to see you again."

"Unbelievable!" He said angrily, turning to L. "Why her?"

"Who is it?" Misa asked mystified. _Mihael?_

Mello spoke through gritted teeth. "My parole officer."

Misa tried unsuccessfully to hold back the small giggle that bubbled up in her throat, her hand covering her mouth. Mello glared at her.

"I needed someone reliable to make sure you're not going off on your own." L said casually. "You wanted to be useful, did you not?"

"She'll send me back the moment she gets the chance! You understand that right?" Mello spat, his eyes wide with indignation.

"Halle has promised to hold off on extraditing you to the US if you help me on this case. However, If you decide to mess around and make any mistakes, she has full authority to do just that."

"You have another photoshoot in an hour." She said checking her phone. "I'm here to escort you."

Mello looked utterly humiliated and Misa reveled in it. After his bizarre treatment of her she was grateful for the beautiful angel who seemed to give him so much grief. _Serves you right._

He grabbed the jacket hanging on the end of the couch with an aggressive swipe. Throwing another annoyed look at Misa before following the woman out, his boots stomping.

"What a baby!" She said laughing. Her hand instinctually holding her injured side. Her smile however fell slightly as L watched her.

They were alone for the first time in days. She smiled at him eagerly. He, however, already seemed to be looking for an exit.

"Wait-don't go yet!" She said quickly. She scanned around the room for an excuse to keep him there. She didn't understand why he was avoiding her.

Her eyes landed on his hands, his knuckles appearing to have several cuts on them.

"Ah I can take care of that!"

She grabbed the first aid kit, and dragged him to the couch, gently applying the antibacterial salve with her fingertips as lightly as possible, just as Mello did for her. He sat there passively while she worked.

She couldn't bring herself to look up at him, even though she could feel his gaze boring a hole in her. They hadn't been alone together since the attack. And holding his hand like that reminded her of the last time they held hands. She wondered if he was thinking about it too.

She applied the last small bandaid on his knuckles. They really didn't need it as they were already healing, but the task made her feel useful.

"I'm sorry you got hurt too." She said softly.

In response to this, he carefully took her arm and rolled the sleeve of her shirt up, revealing the black and purple bruises that stretched along it, mottling her pale skin from where her attacker had grabbed her and dragged her down the stairs.

He inspected them, his expression still smooth and unreadable.

She frowned. They were healing though, yellowing on the edges. Her doctor warned her they would get worse before they got better. She pulled at the shirt to cover them back up, remembering that it was _his_ shirt she was wearing, but he didn't say anything about it.

She recalled what his brother had just told her. _"I'm surprised he hasn't already..."_ So why hadn't he made a move on her then? Did he really sleep with his other clients? She could hardly imagine it. He never showed her any interest and It wasn't like she was hideous. What was stopping him when she was always so eager?

But she remembered before she kissed him, how he took her hands in his. And it also seemed like he did return her kiss, if only briefly. And when he saved her from her attacker, he looked scared. Like he did care, like he was relieved. More than just a detective glad his client wasn't dead. He looked at her now with something more. Was it possible then?

"Your brother told me that you- um" She paused, stuttering through it. "That you used to sleep with some of the people you worked for on cases?"

His head lifted slightly, listening as she spoke.

She continued, her face getting more red with every word. "That just made me wonder, why you don't...or why didn't you ever try anything with-with me? Like even back...then..."

He had leaned over her suddenly, careful not to put any pressure on her body, his long arms caging her in, gripping the couch on either side of her. She pressed herself back into the cushion with a small gasp, shocked by his sudden closeness.

"Is that what you think of me?" He asked, his voice oddly light and quizzical, his head dropped down, his warm breath near her neck, lips ghosting against her skin as he spoke. She shivered, holding as still as possible.

"You think I'd try to _fuck_ the seventeen year old who just found the bodies of her murdered parents?"

Her pulse hammered in her chest at his words. She'd never heard him curse before. She felt a rush of intense remorse, and more horrifyingly, _arousal_ course through her.

"N-no!" She tried, head tilted away, "I didn't mean-"

He pulled back to look her in the eyes. His were black, void of all light. His pale face unreadable, but she could feel the anger and disapproval radiating off of him. His eyes moved down to her lips and back up, he spoke again, his voice low.

"Or maybe you think now I'd try to take advantage of the same woman who was just beaten and thrown down a flight of stairs?"

"No I-I don't-" She stuttered out, overwhelmed by how close he was, and against the rational side of her brain, still insanely, inappropriately, turned on. He was so close, she could smell his skin and whatever soap he used, feel the warmth of him over her, see the slight, barely visible grazing of stubble along his jawline. She sincerely wished she wasn't hurt, she wished he _would_ take advantage of her. She didn't care how it sounded, at least, part of her didn't.

She raised a shaking hand up, wanting to touch his face, reassure him. "I'm sorry-"

His jaw clenched and he pushed himself back up before she could.

"Don't listen to my brother and don't compare me to-."

He stopped turning away with a steadying sigh. "Nevermind. Goodnight Misa."

She watched him leave. She could hear him pressing buttons on the elevator. Finally she was left alone. Again. Shame wasn't a good enough word for how she felt. _What is wrong with me?_ She didn't mean to insinuate that he was a bad guy. Not really. She just wondered if he really slept with his clients why was she any different? Why did he keep her away? She cringed, thinking of exactly what she said.

_"Why didn't you try anything with me back then?"_

How else would he react? Of course he wouldn't try to hit on her back then. She knew that. And Mello probably lied to get a reaction out of her and she fell for it. She smacked her hands to her face. _What was I thinking._ She was going about it all wrong again.

There had to be something there though. She could feel it when they were together, he must too. _That's why he never wants to be alone with me._ Did he still think of her like how she was when they met? That she was still broken and fragile? She needed to clear it up with him and apologize again, and maybe there was a chance he'd see she wasn't seventeen anymore.

* * *

L sat at Watari's large oak desk, his temporary space since having Misa stay. Watari would be back tomorrow and L would have to find some other place to make an office, somewhere far from Misa. His eyes barely focused on the screen before him, long past being able to get any real work done. He hadn't slept in a while and it was quickly catching up to him.

Naomi dropped a manila folder on the desk with a slap.

"I'm not sorry for hitting you." She said bluntly.

"Of course not." He murmured. "I agreed with you."

"I think she loves you." Naomi said, almost accusingly. "I know how you can be. Don't get distracted and don't lead her on."

"That was never my intention."

"She's been through a lot." She continued, ignoring him, "I don't know what case you helped her with before but-"

"Her parents were murdered."

Naomi looked startled, "What?"

"She was seventeen. Both died due to exsanguination, multiple stab wounds. Misa was the one to find them."

Naomi slid slowly into chair opposite of the desk, looking horrorstruck. "What happened?"

"She tried to perform CPR, but it was too late. She was covered in their blood. She found the knife used in the attack outside the entrance to the home and picked it up without thinking. She was immediately implicated. She admitted to having an argument with them that night. She was out late seeing a boyfriend. They didn't approve. Watari told me about the case when I was visiting Japan. I wasn't interested in taking it at first...but I eventually stepped in."

Naomi looked stricken, but listened without interrupting him.

"I was able to track the man down. A serial rapist. Mostly middle school girls. Misa was certainly older than his usual type...but she looked younger than her age back then."

Here he paused, fiddling with the spoon in his coffee, his gaze unfocused.

"He'd watch them for a time, get to know their schedules before he'd sneak in and sexually assault them, repeatedly in their own homes. He wore a mask, so victims could never recall his face. Misa snuck out the night he planned to attack her. He came in, enraged that he couldn't have her and he took that rage out on her parents. The first and only time he killed. Her father was found outside of her bedroom door. It is believed he died trying to protect her, thinking her to still be in the home."

He remembered Watari going in the interrogation room, talking to her gently. Urging her to eat, to rest, making sure she was comfortable. He had a certain way of talking to people when they were scared to calm them, to ease them into listening. It stretched back into L's childhood. He recalled Watari talking to him precisely in that manner as well, the day he came to the orphanage.

When L met to speak with Misa again after their first meeting, she had a very specific sort of misery in her eyes. He recognized it at once.

"We need to go over some details again." He said, after Watari settled them across from one another, in a more secluded interrogation room. L didn't bother saying it was nice to see her again, under the circumstances it was anything but. She nodded slowly, her eyes far away. He doubted she even remembered his name.

By the end of his second round of questioning, her eyes still had that same glazed look. The fiery spirit he saw in her before dwindled down into muted embers that threatened to extinguish entirely. When she spoke, her voice came out as a rasp.

"I should have come home sooner." She said blankly. "Then I'd be-"

"Dead." L finished for her. She looked up at him, and nodded. "Yes. I'd be dead."

"Then we wouldn't have your valuable insight to find the man responsible. There's no use thinking like that."

"You think this is better for me?" She'd asked, her voice barely above a whisper. More tears spilling from her bloodshot eyes. "I'm alone. I wanna be _with_ them."

Her voice was weak as she spoke, the pain in it palpable. "Neither of my parents had siblings. My grandparents died years ago. _I'm alone_."

L wasn't one for thinking about life after death. Never found the need to. He preferred living in the here and now, if not just a few steps ahead when needed. But looking at the girl in front of him he could see her future clearly, or rather lack thereof. She had one foot already in the grave. He'd seen it before, and felt a variation of it himself before. The type of grief that threatened to pull someone down prematurely, the desperate longing to sleep beside the bones and decay that left them behind.

"Your parents wouldn't want you to think that way surely."

More tears leaked from the corners of her eyes. "The last thing we did was argue."

"So you should die too?" He challenged. Her mouth had trembled as if she was confessing some unforgivable, egregious sin. An argument? Even he knew that an argument wouldn't make them feel that way. She looked down at her lap, her eyes squeezed shut.

"I didn't know them, but I know they wouldn't want that for you." He said firmly, with conviction. "No good parent wishes for that. You should stay alive to honor that and-" he paused before adding: "...because you deserve to."

She lay her head on the table before her, arms crossed over her head, and heaved with sobs.

He was never very good at comforting people when they cried. Was he supposed to touch them? Hug them? Leave them alone? He remembered when he was a child the younger children, his brothers especially, would always come to him when they were crying, with stubbed toes and scraped knees. He never understood it, but they'd sit there with him, their eyes and noses running. He was unsure of how to help beyond putting a bandaid on and giving them an awkward pat. Their sniffles would eventually subside and they'd thank him, running off too quickly and surely ending up injured again. Watari would probably say something about his presence being enough, L wasn't sure. But in the case of Misa Amane he hoped it was, because there weren't any words, not in any language he knew, sufficient enough to truly quell grief.

Naomi wiped her tears with the back of her hand. She closed her eyes. "Why did she never tell me?"

Brought back to the present, L shrugged a shoulder, still stirring his coffee absentmindedly. "I couldn't tell you, but please trust me when I say I don't want to put her through any worse than what she's already been through. I've seen firsthand how she's suffered."

"She never said." Naomi said thickly through her tears. "I don't understand, why not even mention it?"

"I had the records sealed. Her request. Maybe she wanted to move on as if nothing happened. I think she must have grown up overnight then. Or perhaps she just didn't want to relive it by repeating it."

He leaned towards the latter, she seemed to compartmentalize her life quite well. Whether that was necessarily _healthy_ was another thing. So it was confusing to him why she ever reached out to him again. Why over the years before this case, she had tried so hard to get a hold of him. To find out how he was, to try to reconnect. Surely he had to remind her of that terrible time in her life.

But she probably saw him differently.

She only idolized him because he caught the man who killed her parents. It was that thought alone that kept him from ever eagerly returning her touches, her smiles, her glances. Shockingly, he realized, it wasn't just about sparing her feelings, but his too.

Because what if he did return them? How quickly would she realize her infatuation with him was simply because he listened? That he only showed her the absolute bare minimum of care that she deserved? He needed her to want more, to _expect_ more from people. It was even worse since he stopped her attacker, because she didn't see it like he did-as his utter failure and gross underestimation of her stalker-but instead like he _saved_ her. She looked at him like the sun shined from him. Her gratitude was making her delusional.

Because no one looked at him like that.

His stomach flipped, his mouth went dry. He couldn't bear to be around her. It was worse when they were alone and she inevitably got closer to him. That strange magnetism she had for him. Her small hands delicately bandaging his like he was actually hurt. Like she wasn't the one wincing every time she took a breath. Like she wasn't the one covered in bruises because he failed.

He briefly wondered if he'd gone overboard by hiring Lidner to babysit Mello, but now that he knew exactly what types of conversations his dear brother was having with Misa, he no longer worried. He'd argue that he simply valued his privacy and that's why he kept her from knowing that part of him, but really he hated the idea of her being disappointed in him.

His hands rubbed over the bandages on his knuckles, fingers peeling up the edges. But did it matter? Wouldn't it be for the best if she found out sooner? Maybe he'd need to do just that. Rip the bandaid off for the both of them.

A ringing phone stirred him from his rumination. Naomi was digging through her purse for her cell phone. He'd almost forgotten she was there.

"Yeah...listen come down to the floor below. He's here...Yeah, I'll meet you out there."

He wouldn't even protest, there was no use. He knew Misa was the one calling.

"I think I understand now." Naomi said as she hung up, now standing to leave. "Why you're so hesitant with her. But, I think she deserves to understand too." She gave him a small nod before excusing herself.

A few minutes later there was a gentle tap at the door. Misa opened it hesitantly, peeking in. It always amazed him how young she looked without makeup on. She looked even more fragile than before. And he noticed, for the first time, what shirt she was wearing.

His.

"Oh this?" She said quickly, incorrectly assuming he was staring at the pillow she brought. "The doctor said it might help my rib if I carried one to hold against me. She was right, it helps! I look a little silly though. But it’s comfortable. Too bad I can't walk around outside like this!"

She was babbling. One of her nervous habits. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Another nervous habit. He memorized them all. Her face took on that same reverent expression when she looked at him. Like he could do no wrong.

She sat down across from him. Under the soft glow of Watari's old yellowed lamps she looked warm, inviting. Sweet. What was a good comparison? Honey, cream, strawberries? He gnawed at his thumbnail. Even in his old shirt she looked beautiful. He became particularly distracted by her lips as she spoke. It would make what he was about to do even worse.

"About earlier, I shouldn't have just assumed your brother was right and that you would do something like that!" She said quickly, "I'm sorry for ever thinking you could. You have to know how much I care about you. I just want-."

"He was telling the truth." He said, his eyes raising to meet hers. "And you should know if I was ever interested in you, I would have tried by now."

Her brows creased for a fraction of a second, betraying the pain he caused her. He wondered if she'd cry, or argue, half wishing she would, because he had a sinking feeling it wouldn't take much to sway him. The moment the words left him he felt sick. He was used to lying, and never felt guilty about it before, but somehow now it felt wrong. More than dishonest, it was cruel.

But she didn't cry, she straightened back up in the chair, fixing her posture.

"Oh!" She said overly brightly, wincing slightly at the effort. "I must have really made you uncomfortable when I kissed you then, huh?" She said with a laugh, "I won't do that again."

L nodded taking a cursory sip of coffee he couldn't taste. "Good. I need to focus more on this investigation. I can't afford to be distracted. Watari returns tomorrow, if you need anything don't hesitate to ask him."

She nodded, bright smile still plastered on her face. "Oh good! I'll do that. Well, I guess I'll get out of your way."

He'd already turned back to the laptop in front of him, pretending to be absorbed in the blank screen. But he watched her, from the corner of his eye, back out and close the door with a small click. He closed his eyes, breathing out a small sigh, feeling no relief.

It wasn't at all like ripping a bandaid off.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...now you know I HAD to pull out the ol' 'Wearing L's Shirt' trope. Had to. Absolutely had to. If you write an LxMisa fic it's required by law. Okay not really, I just think it's stupid cute...but also the pain I felt writing this one haha I'm so sorry :')
> 
> Ten chapters in aaah! This was one of those late updates I warned would happen, midterms hit and then one exam on top of another. But it's a bit longer than usual so I hope that makes up for it.
> 
> I also started working on that smutty one shot I mentioned. It's set in the DN universe with a couple small twists, so I’ll let you guys know when I finish it. 
> 
> Thanks again for your comments. I hope you're all having a lovely and spooky October! L's birthday is Halloween, so indulge in some sugar for him.


	11. The Bargain

_  
there are worse things than_

_being alone_

_but it often takes decades_

_to realize this_

_and most often_

_when you do_

_it's too late_

_and there's nothing worse_

_than_

_too late._

_Charles Bukowski, Oh Yes_

* * *

Misa sat in the back of Watari's car, leaning her head back, her eyes closed. Her agency determined that enough time had passed from her disastrous meet and greet and her doctor agreed she was healing quickly enough to return to work as long as it wasn't strenuous. She was desperate to get back to work, to distract her mind.

She cracked an eye open to look out the window, watching the muted colors of the people walking on the sidewalks, umbrellas and rain obscuring their misty forms. It was a grey and lonely few weeks. Her thoughts strayed to the enormous arrangement of flowers that currently sat on L's dining room table, a gift from Light, that managed to bring some sunshine into her life. She messaged him not long after the attack to explain what happened. And since then, she was never without fresh flowers. They arrived nearly every other day.

She had admired the most recent bouquet, one with bright yellow sunflowers, carnations and sprigs of baby's breath, grateful he knew to skip out on roses. Naomi, who adored all plant life, also admired them with her earlier that morning.

"He certainly makes an impression doesn't he?"

Misa nodded, running her fingers over the delicate, silky petals of a red carnation. She couldn't exactly look back on their date with much fondness, but she appreciated the gesture. And the attention.

After L rejected her, he stayed away from the apartment. The only time she saw him was when she peeked out of her room one night to see him grabbing folders from his office before locking it tightly and leaving again. His back had straightened and for a moment she wondered if he sensed her looking at him. She just closed the door silently and buried herself in the cold bedsheets.

_"...you should know if I was ever interested in you, I would have tried by now."_

She had never faced rejection like that before. To say her ego was bruised put it lightly. He told her she was confused, that he wasn't interested. _He_ wasn't interested...in _her_. Along with the hurt, she felt distinctly put off that any man would reject her. Especially one that looked at her like he did when she kissed him, when he saved her.

_It doesn't matter._ She thought sullenly. She didn't try talking to him again after that. She knew what it was like to have someone not take no for an answer.

"We're here Miss Amane."

Misa looked up, Watari's kind eyes regarding her through the rear view mirror.

"Thank you Watari."

"Are you sure you're feeling alright?"

The old man had made sure she wanted for nothing the moment he arrived back from his trip. He visited her nearly everyday and cooked for her every evening, even when she insisted she was fine. She was grateful for his company even if he usually had to leave soon after to assist L.

"Yeah of course. I'll see you later." She gave him a small smile before ducking out of the car, opening a bright red umbrella to shield her from the pellets of rain. She steeled herself against what she assumed would be lots of backhanded whispers and sideways glances based on everything she'd been through in the past few months.

What Misa did not expect, however, was to be ambushed almost as soon as she came through the door. Several models clamored and crowded around her as she shook off her umbrella, all talking at once.

"Are you alright?"

"Misa is it true there's a serial killer going after models?"

She blinked in surprised. She wasn't sure of how much the other models at her agency had been told, and in fact assumed they were all in the dark. _Serial killer?_ The words rang with alarm inside of her.

"Don't tell me someone died?" Misa asked feeling sick.

"Well, no, but Kana is missing." One said, her face pale. "Her roommate was a makeup artist here, she complained to upper management and she was dismissed! _"_

"Not just her." Another said cutting in worriedly, "You remember Yori Nakamura? She used to work here a few years ago. I heard she went missing too. They said it's the same guy."

Misa felt her stomach drop. She couldn't exactly lie to them. She was hoping nothing would come back to her agency about the stalker, but apparently it was too late for that.

"Oh Misa is that who attacked you?"

"You heard about that too then?" Misa said with a grimace. "I think so, but I haven't heard much either to be honest."

"We thought you'd be next. I'm so freaked out. I actually turned down a shoot next week."

One of the models clasped Misa's hands, speaking tearfully. "That's why you freaked out at that meet and greet isn't it? We all thought you just went crazy. I get it now. I'd probably act the same."

They all nodded solemnly around her. Their eyes filled with worry-not mocking her like she assumed. It was a relief on some level that she wasn't being treated like a pariah, but it worried her too. She didn't want to expose anyone else to her issues.

"The police are looking into it." Misa said weakly. "When I know more I'll make sure to let everyone here know."

"Well why haven't they caught him yet?"

A few more echoed that sentiment, complaining about their safety. She didn't have any answers for them. Her stalker seemed to be even more dangerous than she first thought, but she didn't want to tell them that. It would just scare them even more. She recognized her makeup artist who was waving her over from down the hall.

"I gotta go, but I promise if I hear more I'll let you know!"

She left them feeling her regular pit of anxiety stirring in her stomach. Where did a rumor about a serial killer come from? He was just a stalker, right? _But the other missing girls..._ It occurred to her that something bad had to happen to them if they weren't back after that many years.

She thought of the van and being tied up and thrown inside. Where exactly would he have taken her? What did he have planned? She imagined a future where no one was there to save her, a future where everyone assumed she just quit, like the other girls. With no family to file a report, she'd stay missing forever.

"You'll be working with a new model who came in from overseas." Her makeup artist said cheerfully, cutting into Misa's bleak thoughts. She checked her watch as she ushered her into a chair. "Wait until you see him."

_New model from overseas?_ She had a feeling she knew _exactly_ who she'd be working with.

Misa was pensive as people came in and out, brushing and straightening her hair until it was silky smooth, applying shimmer to her eyes and spreading a peachy pink balm on her lips. She noticed a certain tenseness that pervaded the air, replacing the lighthearted excitement that she usually felt before a shoot. Everyone was on edge. News of Kana's disappearance along with the implication that other models had been missing for years before had everyone nervous.

She was dressed in a pale pink Lolita-esque dress with a matching pink collar fastened around her neck. Looking over the progression of her wardrobe, her outfits became darker, more seductive in color, with less and less fabric, each with its own matching collar. She wondered vaguely if she was being put into some kink magazine. It wouldn't be the first time.

She was lead into the studio where, lo and behold, Mello sat draped on a red velvet couch, a black crown artfully skewed on his carefully tousled hair. The golden lighting that was set up on him made him look like a fallen angel. Adding to this effect was the wicked smile that lit up his face as Misa entered.

"Misa-Misa!" He grinned, eyebrow cocked at her outfit, "I didn't know I'd have the honor of working with you today."

_I seriously doubt that_ she thought sourly, mentally rolling her eyes. He probably jumped at the opportunity to work with her so he could criticize and annoy her all day. But careful to keep up the pretense that they'd never met, she treated him like anyone else. She gave him a small bow, smiling brightly.

"Let's have a great shoot today!"

He smirked under her sugary sweet smile. She was placed at his feet as an assistant arranged her dress.

"I thought you'd be a little more feisty." He muttered under his breath to her. "I get the impression you don't like me."

"I'm a professional." She responded sitting up straight, still keeping her face sweet, "l can ignore how annoying you are if I'm getting paid to do it."

"Oh is that all it takes?"

Another assistant came over, hooking a black leash to Misa's collar, the other end he placed into Mello's hand.

"Keep that relaxed for now." The photographer directed, standing back to check their positions. "We'll have you do different poses for each of her outfits."

"Don't worry I won't let her get loose." Mello vowed. He winked down at Misa, who had the sudden urge to stomp his smug face with her pink platform heels.

She thought she might be uncomfortable with Mello as a partner, given his biting attitude and sarcasm, but surprisingly he was professional and admittedly-a natural. He took cues on demand, knew the right facial expressions for every pose the photographer wanted. He even made his own suggestions that, when she looked over the photos after, definitely made a huge difference in the quality of the shots.

As the shoot progressed her sweet Lolita princess dresses steadily melted away and were replaced with more black leather and lace, with her final outfit being a tangle of provocative leather straps that hugged her body.

Misa stood in front of a mirror checking her outfit. Her side was beginning to ache from the different positions she was put in, not to mention how the director insisted on having her lay on the hard ground while Mello lounged on the sofa above her.

The photographer came over to help adjust her outfit. The way he arranged the leather straps on her panties wasn't exactly obscene, but he lingered there a moment longer than necessary, his cold, clammy hand brushing down her backside. She suppressed a shiver and grit her teeth through it. Not the first time, wouldn't be the last, and from experience if she complained she'd be losing work. She couldn't afford that now.

"Is that really necessary?" A voice said from behind her. She turned to see Mello's manager, who she only saw briefly before, with her arms crossed over her chest. She wore a tight black business suit that Misa thought looked very classy with her red lips. She was zeroed in on the photographer who withered under her sharp gaze.

"I'm just adjusting-"

"Yes, she's very well adjusted thanks to you."

"W-we'll take a break." The photographer stuttered, smiling weakly and looking nervous as he backed up.

Misa turned back to Mello's manager, who she knew as Halle Lidner. Halle watched the photographer scurry away with a look of disdain on her face.

"Thanks." Misa said shyly. "They aren't all like that I promise."

"He's the second one I've had to watch mishandle a model. This agency is-"

"They're all like that." Mello cut in, approaching from behind them. He nibbled at a chocolate bar, looking bored. "I've had some handsy assistants myself."

He grinned at Halle, leaning in. "Would you protect me like that?"

She eyed him cooly. "Of course, I'm your manager." She snatched the chocolate bar from his hands and tossed it into a nearby garbage can. "There. I'm protecting your figure."

He gawked at her as she walked off.

"I like her." Misa said dreamily. She reminded her of Naomi. Both women had a way of speaking their minds that she admired. And envied. Seeing Mello sulk was a definite plus, too.

"She's a pain in my ass." Mello muttered, still watching Lidner's form as she approached the director of the shoot.

"She's your parole officer?" Misa asked curiously.

"Yep."

"Maybe you should be the one wearing this then." She said tossing the leash she wore during the shoot at him.

He caught it, rolling his eyes. "Don't threaten me with a good time."

Misa's makeup artist called out to her, jogging over looking flustered, "Misa, the president's son wants to talk to you. He's in the dressing room."

"Oh!" She said, pulling on the short grey robe the assistant held out for Misa.

Mello's eyes narrowed as Misa quickly walked around him.

Almost as soon as she was through the dressing room door, Light was at her side. He approached her swiftly, pulling her to him and squeezing her body to his which made her keenly aware of how little she was wearing, the thin silk robe being the only barrier, and how she still had more healing to do. She winced in his crushing grip.

"I've been so worried about you." He sighed in relief. She could feel his lips moving in her hair as he breathed in. "I'm sorry I haven't been able to visit you."

He pushed her back gently to get a better look at her, eyes going to the now mostly-healed scar on her head. When covered with makeup it was hardly noticeable. He reached a hand up to cradle it with his, thumb tracing over it lightly. His expression darkened.

"I knew something like this would happen. He isn't protecting you at all."

Misa tried brushing his hand away, "I'm f-"

"Don't say you're fine." He said quietly, "I went to your apartment the day after." His eyes closed, as if in pain. "There was police tape...I saw blood. When I called Ryuzaki to ask what happened, he wouldn't tell me anything."

Misa frowned, "He...didn't tell me you called..."

Light scoffed, pushing his hair back in exasperation. "Of course he didn't. He's incompetent at best and dangerous at worst. What will it take for you to see it?"

He pressed closer to her, his hand caressing her face. Her pulse fluttered in her chest, trying to think of a way out of his insistent grip. _I can't handle this right now!_ She twisted in his arms.

"Someone might come in, they'll see-"

"This company is about to be mine." He murmured darkly. "I don't care."

She stayed still, mind going starkly blank and unable to reason her way out of it. His lips parted, eyes half lidded as he bent low, leaning to capture her mouth.

"Light, please."

He stopped and pulled back to search her eyes. "You don't have feelings for that detective do you?"

She froze, holding her breath. Was it that obvious?

"I do. I mean, I did...and I told him." She admitted. "But he..."

Misa looked down, feeling her face redden. _Don't make me say it._ It must have been answer enough for him though as his eyes glowed in triumph. His grip on her tightened and his laugh was slightly cynical.

"He's even more stupid than I thought."

"That's not fair-"

"Sorry to Interrupt."

She whipped her head around to see Mello who was leaning casually against the door frame, swinging one end of the leash.

"We're due back for the next shots."

Light still hovered near her for a moment, but nodded and leaned back, "Sorry to keep you. I'll call you tonight."

He left looking pleased, which she found confusing considering she just told him she _did_ have feelings for L...but she sighed in relief. Whenever he ambushed her like that she couldn't think straight. Maybe she knew a little of how L must feel when she did the same to him.

Mello whistled low. "Is that how he is with all models? Should I prepare myself?"

"Oh shut up." She said walking past him. He quickly caught up.

"So my brother isn't enough for you, you're seducing your boss too? You're more of a conniving minx than I thought..."

She turned on her heel to block him, causing him to nearly run into her.

"Not that it's any of your business, but your brother turned me down." She said hotly, "So it doesn't matter who I'm flirting with does it?"

"He did?" He asked looking surprised.

"Yes." She hissed turning away to wrench the door open, "Go ahead and laugh! I don't care!"

"He doesn't seem like your type anyway." He said suspiciously.

"Yeah let's call it a momentary lapse of judgment." She muttered, taking off her robe and bundling it up before tossing it to a flustered assistant. "I'll get over it."

She threw herself down on the floor in front of the couch, chewing on her bottom lip in agitation.

"Yes," Mello said hooking her to the leash, his voice light, "You do seem _very_ over it."

* * *

The penthouse was dark and cold by the time she arrived home. Misa heaved a sigh as she slid the door to her room open, stripping off her jewelry, letting it clatter on the dresser.

She walked out to the living room, not bothering to turn on any lights. Heavy fog had rolled in, obscuring the city lights, making her feel like she were 100 miles up, high in a lonely tower. She walked out to the balcony, shivering as the a gust of cold wind bit at her face.

It wasn't exactly the day back to work she wanted. She was hoping to come home feeling accomplished, but where she was staying wasn't home. She hated coming back to the empty penthouse. Hated that Naomi was busy. That L wouldn't speak to her. That she wanted to sit and talk with him or bring him coffee and snacks like she did before. _God I'm pathetic._

She wanted an escape. One opportunity did present itself to her. A director she'd never worked with before approached her about doing a winter photoshoot all the way in Hokkaido the following week. She told him she'd think about it. A week away sounded nice.

Her phone rang from in her pocket. She pulled it out to see Light's number. She walked back inside, sliding the doors to the balcony shut as she answered.

"Hello?"

"I'm sorry if I'm calling too late."

She found her cardigan laying on the couch and pulled it on as she walked through the apartment. "Not at all. I was actually feeling a little lonely to be honest."

She could hear the surprise in his voice, "You're not there alone, are you?"

"Yeah, Ryuzaki moved his office to another part of the building i think." She didn't bother trying to find him or asking Naomi, who would have surely told her where he was. He didn't want her near him, he made that clear.

"Are you always there alone?"

"Kinda, yeah."

The line was silent for a beat. She wondered for a moment if he had left, but he spoke again, his words had a careful, controlled quality to them.

"Misa, if I find your stalker, would you choose me instead?"

Her mouth opened and closed. "What? But, people are already looking for him."

"And they haven't found him yet. They won't." He said, a quiet urgency behind his words, "I wouldn't leave you alone. I wouldn't leave you locked up there in the dark." He paused before continuing, his voice steady and determined, "I know about your parents."

This rendered her speechless, panic causing her to feel dizzy. _There's no way!_ "W-what about them?"

"I was going over some documents for when I take over the company and I saw. Misa, if you don't have a family, I can give you one. We can make one-the perfect one."

"Light." She whispered, tears beading in her eyes as she sunk down to the cold floor in front of the windows. "You don't understand I didn't want anyone to know-."

"I can give you things he can't- things he won't." Light insisted, his voice was almost hypnotic in its softness, pulling her in. "I want you. I always have. So let _me_ take care of you."

Misa felt the unmistakeable heavy pressure of loneliness sinking into her, like she could sink through the marble floor beneath her from the weight of it. She used to think that part of what made her connection to L so special was his intimate knowledge of her pain. He was the only one she could trust, the only one who saw her when she was at her lowest, who helped her out of the dark. But Light was offering her everything she wanted, a place to belong and someone to care for her.

She turned to look at L's dark office, feeling another rush of painful longing. She used to dream about seeing him again after he solved her parents murder. When she did a TV commercial or landed a coveted spot in a famous magazine, she imagined him seeing it from wherever he was in the world, and being proud of her for growing, for taking his advice to heart. She wanted to meet him again, to tell him how much his comforting words meant to her, how they shaped her. How much _he_ meant to her, tell him how often she thought of him, how often she wished she knew more about him. But that meeting had been tainted, perhaps forever, by her stalker. It wasn't at all how she dreamed of seeing him again. She wanted to meet up with him as a friend-not a client. But it occurred to her that he would probably always see her that way, so it didn't matter what she wanted.

"Light I-" She swallowed at her tears once more, "I'm just so lonely."

* * *

"I know. Look, I'll see you at work tomorrow, I promise. I'll make everything better...I have to go. We'll talk about this more then."

L watched as Light quickly hung up the phone, tucking it into his pocket.

"You can come in now, Mr. Yagami." L said politely.

The two men entered the interrogation room together. Watari and Mello were watching from behind the one way mirror to observe the questioning. He trusted Watari's expertise and Mello too had exceptional observational skills he could utilize. It was the first time he was getting Light Yagami alone for a conversation. The first of many he assumed.

Light sat down opposite him, his face polite, but distant.

L could see the slight outline of Light's cellphone poking out of his jacket pocket. "I heard you on the phone before you came in."

Light smiled, "Yes, it was someone important to me. I'll leave it at that. You don't want to get into my dating life."

"On the contrary I'd love to hear about your dating life," L said casually, pulling his tea towards him to sip on. "You seem to have a pretty sparse one. It's surprising."

"Why is it surprising? I'm a busy man and I always have been."

"Too busy for a relationship?" L mused. "I find that hard to believe."

"Well, what about you Ryuzaki?" Light asked, he leaned back in the chair comfortably as he spoke. "You seem pretty busy too, I'm assuming you don't have a partner as well?"

_Turning the question back on me. Deflection._

"Hmm." L responded thoughtfully. "I suppose it is possible to be too busy. We're two different people though. Different goals and expectations...And as I gathered from your illuminating conversation with Miss Amane a few weeks ago, you're seeking a wife almost immediately, so you'll have to excuse my confusion as to why you're now so eager?"

Light didn't outwardly react to the news that their dinner wasn't private. L thought he must have had some clue that it wasn't. Still, he watched him carefully.

"Everyone needs to settle down at some point." He said reasonably, shrugging a shoulder. "I'm about to take over a large company, I want my life in order before I do it."

L set his cup back down. "I have to wonder what keeps you occupied outside of your work life. What hobbies do you have?"

Light smiled again, one that didn't quite reach his eyes. "I'm sure you've looked into my habits and hobbies enough to know that answer."

"Yes, I just wanted to hear it from you. I'm very curious as to what goes on in that head of yours. You're very guarded."

Light's head tilted slightly. "And here I thought you had a stalking case to take care of."

"So I do." L murmured.

Light's eyes went to the manilla folder sitting on the table between them. Aside from his tea accoutrements, it was the only item on the table. L purposefully hadn't referred to it. Instead he continued their conversation.

"How long have you known Teru Mikami?"

"Sorry, I don't know who that is." He could tell Light expected the question. There was a practiced and careful look of confusion that flitted across his face. _What an actor._

"It's the man who assaulted Miss Amane." L said, keeping his tone light and even. "Facade hired him for set construction in January this year before he was fired for sexual misconduct in April."

Light stared at him as if he were dense. "If you know who her stalker his, why haven't you caught him? Why bring me in?"

"Because Mikami isn't her stalker." L said, reaching across the table, his hand hovered briefly over the folder before pushing it aside to pull a small bowl to sugar cubes towards him. Light's eyes followed the movement carefully.

"I suppose you can't remember everyone the company hires though, can you?" L mused again, plunking more sugar into his tea.

"It looks like we did the right thing by firing him." Light said seriously. "He was dangerous. I'd be more than happy to help you if needed. I once had an interest in criminal justice you know."

For a moment he considered it. His main suspect was volunteering to help with his investigation. _Interesting_. Was it a play to look innocent? Of course it was. _But keeping him close could be a unique opportunity._ An image appeared in his mind of the two men playing chess, with Light grinning at him triumphantly from across the board. How simple would it be to make him falter? To watch how quickly his confidence would ruin him? It would be a challenge, a tempting one.

But this wasn't a game.

All of his excited thinking halted, however, when he remembered where his headquarters were and who currently resided above them. _Misa_. He felt his chest tighten. Keeping Light Yagami too close would undoubtedly be dangerous. The thought of bringing Light anywhere near Misa was out of the question. He wouldn't risk her safety anymore.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline." He said quietly.

Light sat back looking disappointed."That's too bad." He responded, "I have some free time before I take over the company and-"

"Are you bored?" L asked softly. "Have the women you've taken finally lost their appeal?"

The room was suddenly silent, void of air. Even the hum of traffic outside the building, the footsteps down the hall, the ticking hand on the clock, all seemed to cease. L again saw a flash of the sociopath he knew lived inside of him, behind the carefully crafted shining facade. L continued on, keeping his voice light.

"Perhaps they're not even around anymore to tempt you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Ryuzaki." Light cut in, his voice razor sharp. "But if you're insinuating what I think you are, this conversation might be better had with a lawyer present."

"Why did you agree to speak without one?"

"I respect you. I was hoping to work with you." He spat the words out in anger.

L cocked his head in surprise. _That might actually be the truth._

"But it looks like I'll need to go ahead with hiring my own investigators-you're not taking care of my model."

For the first time since they started talking, L felt irritation pricking under his skin at those words. He felt his palms itch. _My model._ The possessive monster inside of him sulked at that. _She's not yours._

_Not mine either._

Unfortunately, he was more perceptive than L hoped, his eyes narrowed in understanding. Light stood up, metal chair scraping loudly against the floor.

"I think I'm ready to leave. I'm sorry we couldn't work together Ryuzaki." He said coldly.

"It's unfortunate." L agreed.

The door to the investigation room opened, with Watari entering, probably noticing the subtle shift in L's mood and sudden hostility from the usually mild mannered Light.

Light paused in the doorway, turning to Watari.

"Sir?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry to bother you, but do you know of any good jewelry stores nearby?"

Watari blinked looking bemused. "There's Piaget in Shinjuku and I believe a Harry Winston nearby as well-"

"Thank you." Light said with a tight smile. "I'm in the market for a ring."

L's body felt tightly coiled and tense. He swallowed back the fierce possessiveness that boiled up inside of him as Light slammed the door behind him. _Trying to mark your territory I see._ L realized he may have been making a mistake pushing Misa away all this time. Perhaps he needed to remedy that.

Mello had wandered in after he was sure Light had gone. He flipped open the manilla folder on the table with a laugh.

"It's empty!"

L bit his thumb, mind still partially distracted by thoughts of Misa. Just how close was he supposed to keep her? He responded to his brother absentmindedly.

"I needed him to think we have more information than we do."

Mello hopped up on the table, tossing a few cubes of sugar directly into his mouth.

"It worked. He couldn't keep his eyes off it. I bet he's wondering what dirt is in there."

"What do the other models make of it?" L asked suddenly, remembering something.

"They're scared." Mello said simply. "I've overheard them. I spread the rumor a few days ago at a drinking party after work like you asked. They're definitely being more cautious now."

L nodded, satisfied. If Facade wouldn't warn their models about a dangerous predator in their midst, he'd have to do it for them. The more models on alert, the better.

L wasn't sure exactly what Light did with the models, but he did know that any model would willingly go with him if he asked. He was charming, handsome and in a position of power. Based on his internet search history, which he finally managed to get a hold of, Light had a taste for sexual torture. It wasn't enough to bring him in for anything more than the questioning they just had, but it was enough to solidify what he knew from the beginning: Light Yagami was not safe.

"You'd better do something about him." Mello said seriously. "I wasn't sure at first about it being him at first, but I saw him getting cozy with your little model today."

"What were they saying? Did you keep an eye on-"

Mello held up a hand. "I'm not an idiot of course I kept an eye on her. He's a good actor when she's watching him, but the moment she's not." He paused with a frown. "There's something not right about him."

_So Mello sees it too._

Continuing in a slightly lighter tone he added, "There's got to be something wrong with him if he's talking about marriage."

"I would like the two of you to settle down someday."

Watari had come back in the room from escorting Light looking weary.

Mello looked aghast at the idea. "Us?"

Watari nodded. "You-neither of you-will be young men forever. It would be nice to see you happy."

"And-" Watari added, pulling on his long grey overcoat. "I would like to retire and be a grandfather someday, and not spend so many of my nights outside of an interrogation room."

Mello rolled his eyes. "You may have adopted the wrong sons then."

"I've pulled the car around you should head through the back door first so no one sees you."

Mello cocked an eyebrow, but obviously recognizing the dismissal in Watari's tone, he nodded and left.

L and Watari left the interrogation room together, walking in silence. L felt ruffled by his conversation with Light. He didn't learn much of anything new, but his relationship with Misa was advancing much more quickly than he preferred. He couldn't ignore the constant delivery of flowers to his apartment everyday. After all, Light designed them that way. They were extravagant, over the top displays of affection. What was the term? _Love bombing?_ Typical behavior of abusers to overwhelm the object of their desire with gifts and flattery in order to better control them later. He'd seen it many times before. Light was at least predictable in that way.

He would have to think of a way to distract her from all that. _"I apologize for pushing you away Misa, I actually lied I do want you."_ Yes, that would definitely go poorly, wouldn't It? So what, enter into a fake relationship to distract her away from Light? Just until he had enough evidence to prosecute him...It could work. It didn't even have to be a relationship per se, just some distraction. Though, eventually he'd have to end it, whatever it ended up being. He wasn't looking forward to that conversation. Maybe he'd make himself into a terrible romantic partner, to make it easier _? That won't be hard_ he thought sardonically _._ All of this, of course, was dependent on if Misa was still angry with him which he had a feeling she was. _So it might not even work out anyway._ But if it did, there would certainly be _other_ benefits.

He tried to ignore the guilt that came with those thoughts.

"I rarely give you advice," Watari said, cutting into L's thoughts. They were at a back area of the police station. Watari stopped him before he could head out the door to the waiting vehicle, "-but I feel as though now I should."

L frowned. "That's not true, you always give valuable input on cases."

Watari shook his head. "Not that kind of advice."

He could tell Watari searched for the words carefully before he spoke.

"Someday, when you're an old man like myself, you will look back on your life and reflect-it's what old men are best at- and in those quiet moments you'll notice what's missing. You'll come home to an empty house and you'll spend many lonely nights wondering what you could have done to keep her beside you."

L let out a breath. He should have known exactly where the conversation was headed. There were many times recently he noticed, particularly after he spent time with Misa, that Watari would look at L with something similar to disappointment. It was uncommon for him, as he spend most of L's life telling him how proud he was. He was also somewhat shocked at how sentimental the old man was.

"And so your advice?" L asked softly.

"My advice: When you become an old man reflecting on your days, make sure you have a wiser old woman beside you."

He gave L a gentle pat on the shoulder before putting on his hat and heading out the door. L stopped and watched the cold wind pick up the last scattering of brown leaves swirling around.

If only it were that simple.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the late update. I live in the US and this election combined with school and work have me seriously beat, but I'm not abandoning my child, no worries. This is my little self indulgent escape I’ll always return haha. 
> 
> I did get a question on FF about how long this story will be and when I outlined it earlier this year it was around 20 chapters, but I’ve changed a lot of it and added some things since then sooo long story short...uhhh who knows! We’ll see haha!
> 
> Thank you for the support and comments you leave, they have made me so happy to read and made me finally sit down and update properly.
> 
> AN: I forgot to mention! There will be a little bit of *SPICE* within the next two chapters don’t worry ;)


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